And you're a great support group, can't even start on how much you have helped me
https://redd.it/1m8kw15
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1m8kw15
@asexualityonreddit
Being asexual but not aromantic sucks sometimes
I still get crushes so I have feelings to refferance back to on what I could be missing out on. Every time I have liked anyone it was unrequited and just stung me. I've never been in a relationship but I wish I didn't long for emotional and physical intimacy like cuddling. I see romantic things everywhere and instead of just not caring I feel jelous for a time I could have had my feelings requited but didn't because of not being desirable. If I was aromantic I wouldn't care about romance. I try to just decenter romance as the most I can do but it is everywhere when I go out and see couples or when I can't hang out with a friend without being a third wheel to their partner.
The worst part is I am jelous of what I missed out on but if there was never the romantic attraction there in the first place it wouldn't be just something I missed out on from being romantically undesirable because I just wouldn't care about it in the first place. It sucks that I'm shackled to this primal urge within me for love that I can't even attain in the first place. Its such a waste of feelings to always catch them for the wrong person. I can't escape my biological need for companionship romantically but why should I feel that I need it when I can't even have it? Why should I feel a need for it if I don't even have the courage to attain it or talk to anyone? The logical solution would be to be born aromantic but I can't make myself become that or get rid of my desire.
Romance is a part of almost everything and since I feel romantic attraction that is what makes it sting all the worse because it is a desire in the first place. I think of all the times when I had crushes that were unrequited and get jelous of people who got what I wanted. Desire really is the root of all suffering.
https://redd.it/1m8pe6s
@asexualityonreddit
I still get crushes so I have feelings to refferance back to on what I could be missing out on. Every time I have liked anyone it was unrequited and just stung me. I've never been in a relationship but I wish I didn't long for emotional and physical intimacy like cuddling. I see romantic things everywhere and instead of just not caring I feel jelous for a time I could have had my feelings requited but didn't because of not being desirable. If I was aromantic I wouldn't care about romance. I try to just decenter romance as the most I can do but it is everywhere when I go out and see couples or when I can't hang out with a friend without being a third wheel to their partner.
The worst part is I am jelous of what I missed out on but if there was never the romantic attraction there in the first place it wouldn't be just something I missed out on from being romantically undesirable because I just wouldn't care about it in the first place. It sucks that I'm shackled to this primal urge within me for love that I can't even attain in the first place. Its such a waste of feelings to always catch them for the wrong person. I can't escape my biological need for companionship romantically but why should I feel that I need it when I can't even have it? Why should I feel a need for it if I don't even have the courage to attain it or talk to anyone? The logical solution would be to be born aromantic but I can't make myself become that or get rid of my desire.
Romance is a part of almost everything and since I feel romantic attraction that is what makes it sting all the worse because it is a desire in the first place. I think of all the times when I had crushes that were unrequited and get jelous of people who got what I wanted. Desire really is the root of all suffering.
https://redd.it/1m8pe6s
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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UK's online safety act and what it means for this subreddit
Hello everyone.
As you might have heard the UK's Online Safety Act has come into force this week. One of the consequences is that websites are now required to verify the age of anyone in the UK accessing "adult content". In the case of Reddit they have decided that this means all subreddits and posts with the "NSFW" label, which will unfortunately catch a lot of queer support groups / content. We believe is inappropriate in general, and particularly in our case where what's marked as "NFSW" is tame textual content.
The mod team are considering changing our post labelling policy so that no posts are marked "NSFW". Instead we can create a new flair for this purpose. This does unfortunately mean that we lose some features – with the official NSFW label users that don't want to see such content can set it to hidden in their settings. However, having a new flair hopefully strikes the right balance.
Let us know what you think of this proposal and the situation in general.
Thanks – your mod team.
https://redd.it/1m8sj6q
@asexualityonreddit
Hello everyone.
As you might have heard the UK's Online Safety Act has come into force this week. One of the consequences is that websites are now required to verify the age of anyone in the UK accessing "adult content". In the case of Reddit they have decided that this means all subreddits and posts with the "NSFW" label, which will unfortunately catch a lot of queer support groups / content. We believe is inappropriate in general, and particularly in our case where what's marked as "NFSW" is tame textual content.
The mod team are considering changing our post labelling policy so that no posts are marked "NSFW". Instead we can create a new flair for this purpose. This does unfortunately mean that we lose some features – with the official NSFW label users that don't want to see such content can set it to hidden in their settings. However, having a new flair hopefully strikes the right balance.
Let us know what you think of this proposal and the situation in general.
Thanks – your mod team.
https://redd.it/1m8sj6q
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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Learned this sub was a thing (which I’m very glad for), have some garlic bread I made the other day (week? Idk anymore)!
https://redd.it/1m8usmr
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1m8usmr
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Reddit
From the aaaaaaacccccccce community on Reddit: Learned this sub was a thing (which I’m very glad for), have some garlic bread I…
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witch asexual are u?
are u a garlic bread asexual or cheesy bread asexual?? owo
for me, i am a cheesy bread asexual. uwu
https://redd.it/1m8wf93
@asexualityonreddit
are u a garlic bread asexual or cheesy bread asexual?? owo
for me, i am a cheesy bread asexual. uwu
https://redd.it/1m8wf93
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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would i make more sense to date another asexual?
18f, i feel like no men will really want to be in a relationship with me because im ace. especially being aego can be really confusing to them. most dudes either think it's not real, or it's just not their thing (which is fine). so would it make sense to just date another ace man? i feel like this has probably already been talked about so sorry😭
https://redd.it/1m929m9
@asexualityonreddit
18f, i feel like no men will really want to be in a relationship with me because im ace. especially being aego can be really confusing to them. most dudes either think it's not real, or it's just not their thing (which is fine). so would it make sense to just date another ace man? i feel like this has probably already been talked about so sorry😭
https://redd.it/1m929m9
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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Adult sites no longer accessible in the UK
UK internet users may (or may not) have noticed that a lot of sites hosting adult content are no longer accessible from today. Proof of age is now required, which could mean uploading documents or using facial recognition.
Although there are some good intentions behind this, it isn't proving popular with many people. And I'm guessing if it works here, it will be rolled out elsewhere.
I'm curious to know how aces feel about it? Will you / would you go down the proof of age route? Will you miss those sites or will you barely notice? And do you feel this is potentially about more than supposedly keeping kids safer?
https://redd.it/1m92wfi
@asexualityonreddit
UK internet users may (or may not) have noticed that a lot of sites hosting adult content are no longer accessible from today. Proof of age is now required, which could mean uploading documents or using facial recognition.
Although there are some good intentions behind this, it isn't proving popular with many people. And I'm guessing if it works here, it will be rolled out elsewhere.
I'm curious to know how aces feel about it? Will you / would you go down the proof of age route? Will you miss those sites or will you barely notice? And do you feel this is potentially about more than supposedly keeping kids safer?
https://redd.it/1m92wfi
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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Genuinely why do ppl care what we do in private?
Listen, I understand asexuality can be a complex sexuality due to the large spectrum surrounding it, so there's bound to be questions out of pure curiosity. I get that.
But then almost half of the questions I see here are stuff like "do asexuals enjoy sex???" "do asexuals masturbate???" "do asexuals enjoy hot sloppy style footjob dommy mommy mlm french kissing??" and shit like that. Literally, why do y'all wanna know so badly? Do u see us, ace folk, asking u, an allo, what u do in bed 24/7? No we do not bcuz we're not licensed sex therapists therefore it's none of our fucking business. Plz be respectful and do the same, what we do with our sex lives does not concern u, nor does it affect u in any way.
There's an entire FAQ here just for that reason which answers every question in detail, no need to be so invasive with ur questions.
Also srry if I came off very aggressive with this post, I rlly needed to voice my frustrations abt the fact that some ppl rlly need to just stfu over certain personal topics
https://redd.it/1m9741a
@asexualityonreddit
Listen, I understand asexuality can be a complex sexuality due to the large spectrum surrounding it, so there's bound to be questions out of pure curiosity. I get that.
But then almost half of the questions I see here are stuff like "do asexuals enjoy sex???" "do asexuals masturbate???" "do asexuals enjoy hot sloppy style footjob dommy mommy mlm french kissing??" and shit like that. Literally, why do y'all wanna know so badly? Do u see us, ace folk, asking u, an allo, what u do in bed 24/7? No we do not bcuz we're not licensed sex therapists therefore it's none of our fucking business. Plz be respectful and do the same, what we do with our sex lives does not concern u, nor does it affect u in any way.
There's an entire FAQ here just for that reason which answers every question in detail, no need to be so invasive with ur questions.
Also srry if I came off very aggressive with this post, I rlly needed to voice my frustrations abt the fact that some ppl rlly need to just stfu over certain personal topics
https://redd.it/1m9741a
@asexualityonreddit
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Am I asexual?
Hi! I’m a 25yo female and really would like to conceptualize my sexuality. For starters, I’ve had very negative interactions around sexual experiences due several molestations between my early childhood and into late teens. Unfortunately, that led to me becoming hyper sexual within my late teens early twenties. I also struggled with the PTSD from one of the repressed molestations as a child which resulted in me having recurring nightmares all throughout my early twenties. I’m currently on the other side of this hurdle with some therapy and some close platonic relationships that came and go through the years. I think I’m doing better now.
In this years, I found myself in some monogamous relationships (while they weren’t always the best I don’t think they were caused by my traumatic childhood). I say all of this to say, sex feels like a tasks that I get a reward for which would be satisfaction for my partner but it doesn’t inherently feels like a shared experience for me anymore. From partner to partner, I could never shake the feeling of it being nothing more than something to do and something that I should do right. I do enjoy sex, I do get urges with being with someone, even more if I’m attracted the person but also feel like it’s a chore and then I also have to be good at it.
I never really thought much of this until I’ve met my most recent partner who identifies as polyamorous. I enjoy our relationship for what it is and him being polyamorous didn’t change my feelings but I do think it has highlighted this feeling of sex being a chore even more. I thought it was because I was averse to physical intimacy but I enjoy experiences with him and enjoy satisfying him, that chore again. Our relationship is new and I’ve shared with him about this disconnect I have with sex but I haven’t told him about the sexual abuse I experienced as a child (mainly because in my previous relationships it never felt as if it carried much weight neither did it feel like my partners made room for it. Not saying my current partner wouldn’t be receptive but I’m so tired of being let down and being vulnerable with the weight of something so heavy and having someone drop it like it’s nothing. I’m also just scared of not receiving the care I need. As a person, I’m very selective in terms of being vulnerable and I pose as being well rounded to protect myself as I don’t really have anybody). I don’t think his sexual relations is affecting it because I feel like if we have sex more then this feeling grows more even though I enjoy being with him sexually. If it matters our relationship is poly/monogamish ( although I don’t really like to identify myself as monogamish or anything really; I feel like “me”). Just really needed someone to talk to about this tbh
TLDR; am I asexual? Navigating internal conflicts post childhood sexual abuse.
https://redd.it/1m9a2ez
@asexualityonreddit
Hi! I’m a 25yo female and really would like to conceptualize my sexuality. For starters, I’ve had very negative interactions around sexual experiences due several molestations between my early childhood and into late teens. Unfortunately, that led to me becoming hyper sexual within my late teens early twenties. I also struggled with the PTSD from one of the repressed molestations as a child which resulted in me having recurring nightmares all throughout my early twenties. I’m currently on the other side of this hurdle with some therapy and some close platonic relationships that came and go through the years. I think I’m doing better now.
In this years, I found myself in some monogamous relationships (while they weren’t always the best I don’t think they were caused by my traumatic childhood). I say all of this to say, sex feels like a tasks that I get a reward for which would be satisfaction for my partner but it doesn’t inherently feels like a shared experience for me anymore. From partner to partner, I could never shake the feeling of it being nothing more than something to do and something that I should do right. I do enjoy sex, I do get urges with being with someone, even more if I’m attracted the person but also feel like it’s a chore and then I also have to be good at it.
I never really thought much of this until I’ve met my most recent partner who identifies as polyamorous. I enjoy our relationship for what it is and him being polyamorous didn’t change my feelings but I do think it has highlighted this feeling of sex being a chore even more. I thought it was because I was averse to physical intimacy but I enjoy experiences with him and enjoy satisfying him, that chore again. Our relationship is new and I’ve shared with him about this disconnect I have with sex but I haven’t told him about the sexual abuse I experienced as a child (mainly because in my previous relationships it never felt as if it carried much weight neither did it feel like my partners made room for it. Not saying my current partner wouldn’t be receptive but I’m so tired of being let down and being vulnerable with the weight of something so heavy and having someone drop it like it’s nothing. I’m also just scared of not receiving the care I need. As a person, I’m very selective in terms of being vulnerable and I pose as being well rounded to protect myself as I don’t really have anybody). I don’t think his sexual relations is affecting it because I feel like if we have sex more then this feeling grows more even though I enjoy being with him sexually. If it matters our relationship is poly/monogamish ( although I don’t really like to identify myself as monogamish or anything really; I feel like “me”). Just really needed someone to talk to about this tbh
TLDR; am I asexual? Navigating internal conflicts post childhood sexual abuse.
https://redd.it/1m9a2ez
@asexualityonreddit
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Quote from my asexual friend
"Imagine if i could do actual asexual reproduction. like imagine if i could make clones of myself and take over the world."
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@asexualityonreddit
"Imagine if i could do actual asexual reproduction. like imagine if i could make clones of myself and take over the world."
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Trying to figure out which section of ace I am
I’m ok with kissing and cuddling and other intimate things like that but sex…I realized I have very little desire for it but that I could maybe do it with my partner. I’m scared that means I’m not ace, even though I know being ace means “experiencing little to no sexual attraction”. I hope this makes sense
https://redd.it/1m9gxrp
@asexualityonreddit
I’m ok with kissing and cuddling and other intimate things like that but sex…I realized I have very little desire for it but that I could maybe do it with my partner. I’m scared that means I’m not ace, even though I know being ace means “experiencing little to no sexual attraction”. I hope this makes sense
https://redd.it/1m9gxrp
@asexualityonreddit
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Do we have stereotypes?
So I feel like all other sexual orientations have stereotypes: like gay men are feminine, or gay women move way too fast, or bisexuals are artsy/alternative. Not saying I agree with these or anything, but they definitely exist.
So I guess I’m wondering if there are similar ideas about asexuals that you have heard?
https://redd.it/1m9ghdw
@asexualityonreddit
So I feel like all other sexual orientations have stereotypes: like gay men are feminine, or gay women move way too fast, or bisexuals are artsy/alternative. Not saying I agree with these or anything, but they definitely exist.
So I guess I’m wondering if there are similar ideas about asexuals that you have heard?
https://redd.it/1m9ghdw
@asexualityonreddit
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