The Matter of Representation
I struggled with my sexuality since I was a kid.
I always knew I liked boys and girls, but there was always a sort of... Layer separating me from my attraction. I never knew what it was.
I considered asexuality for a while, and my partner was more than understanding, but he also honestly told me that he didn't think it was the right fit for me. Ultimately, he turned out to be right.
And while I was already familiar with the label I'd eventually end up using, I'd never given it enough thought.
Then, one day, I read a comic. An older, Tumblr era MLM comic that my partner gave me. "This character reminds me so much of you!" And so I read.
And about halfway through that same character, the character I'd begun to project onto, came to a realization.
He couldn't feel any sexual attraction or drive without some emotional connection. Even with a previous partner, when he thought that their emotional connection weakened, he'd begun to lose that sexual urge.
Eventually, the characters put a label on it.
"Are you Demisexual?"
...
That was the one time I've ever felt like representation not only mattered, but was genuinely helpful.
Eventually, I brought this back to my partner. Explained that when they addressed it in the comic, I'd also felt understood. And since he'd read it too, he had no trouble understanding me.
And so now I know.
I know that I'm Demisexual, and Demiromantic.
And I could've lived my whole life without these labels, true...
But I'm still glad that just reading a webcomic put an end to my questioning.
https://redd.it/td5avs
@asexualityonreddit
I struggled with my sexuality since I was a kid.
I always knew I liked boys and girls, but there was always a sort of... Layer separating me from my attraction. I never knew what it was.
I considered asexuality for a while, and my partner was more than understanding, but he also honestly told me that he didn't think it was the right fit for me. Ultimately, he turned out to be right.
And while I was already familiar with the label I'd eventually end up using, I'd never given it enough thought.
Then, one day, I read a comic. An older, Tumblr era MLM comic that my partner gave me. "This character reminds me so much of you!" And so I read.
And about halfway through that same character, the character I'd begun to project onto, came to a realization.
He couldn't feel any sexual attraction or drive without some emotional connection. Even with a previous partner, when he thought that their emotional connection weakened, he'd begun to lose that sexual urge.
Eventually, the characters put a label on it.
"Are you Demisexual?"
...
That was the one time I've ever felt like representation not only mattered, but was genuinely helpful.
Eventually, I brought this back to my partner. Explained that when they addressed it in the comic, I'd also felt understood. And since he'd read it too, he had no trouble understanding me.
And so now I know.
I know that I'm Demisexual, and Demiromantic.
And I could've lived my whole life without these labels, true...
But I'm still glad that just reading a webcomic put an end to my questioning.
https://redd.it/td5avs
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
The Matter of Representation
I struggled with my sexuality since I was a kid. I always knew I liked boys and girls, but there was always a sort of... Layer separating me from...
How did I not know this? I just wanted to learn how to build traps T^T
https://redd.it/tdml6m
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/tdml6m
@asexualityonreddit
I don’t think he knows that I am Ace but look at what my Grandpa wore at my birthday.
https://redd.it/tduxe8
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/tduxe8
@asexualityonreddit
My friend sent me this chart she found in her textbook. She’s taking a class on the psychology of sex.
https://redd.it/tdz7c6
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/tdz7c6
@asexualityonreddit
This is the first thing that comes up when you search ‘asexual’ in Urban Dictionary, and I find it amusing
https://redd.it/te97xw
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/te97xw
@asexualityonreddit
Brooklyn-99 made a ace joke and it’s kinda left me with a poor taste in my mouth.
I forgot what episode specific it was but it is late in the second season. The episode revolved mostly around Jake’s dad coming back because he needed help while everyone else was solving a puzzle captain holt gave them. At the end of the episode while they where at the bar like usual at the end of the episodes they where talking about the puzzle. Gina was, well being gena and was talking to Amy and Terry about how they failed. I don’t really remember it when I actually watched but was going to find it after and post it to some other ace sub so we can add something to the representation board and saw what it actually said.
Terry: “I’m sorry if we implied you weren’t smart.”
Gina: “oh, and I’m sorry if we implied you’re both asexual nerds who can only be friends with service animals.”
I don’t know how I never noticed this line on my first watch through of the series and how I didn’t catch this ether poorly executed joke or “lighthearted” joke. After hearing this I’ve kinda lost motivation to finish watching it again and am just tired of media showing us as mentally ill and unstable freeks.
https://redd.it/teiv5l
@asexualityonreddit
I forgot what episode specific it was but it is late in the second season. The episode revolved mostly around Jake’s dad coming back because he needed help while everyone else was solving a puzzle captain holt gave them. At the end of the episode while they where at the bar like usual at the end of the episodes they where talking about the puzzle. Gina was, well being gena and was talking to Amy and Terry about how they failed. I don’t really remember it when I actually watched but was going to find it after and post it to some other ace sub so we can add something to the representation board and saw what it actually said.
Terry: “I’m sorry if we implied you weren’t smart.”
Gina: “oh, and I’m sorry if we implied you’re both asexual nerds who can only be friends with service animals.”
I don’t know how I never noticed this line on my first watch through of the series and how I didn’t catch this ether poorly executed joke or “lighthearted” joke. After hearing this I’ve kinda lost motivation to finish watching it again and am just tired of media showing us as mentally ill and unstable freeks.
https://redd.it/teiv5l
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Brooklyn-99 made a ace joke and it’s kinda left me with a poor...
I forgot what episode specific it was but it is late in the second season. The episode revolved mostly around Jake’s dad coming back because he...