The first CPI print of the new year showed up fashionably late—but at least it brought good news. Inflation came in a touch softer than what Wall Street had pre-ordered: a breezy +0.2% month-over-month and a well-behaved +2.4% year-over-year. That’s down from last month’s spicier +2.7% and just enough to make politicians bragging that inflation is ‘under their control’. Underneath the polite headline number, the real party tricks emerged. Food inflation finally decided to go on a diet, posting its weakest annual gain since November. Energy, never one to miss drama, flipped back into deflation mode—because apparently oil prices also made New Year’s resolutions. Meanwhile, core goods quietly cooled off to their tamest increase since July, as if they too got the memo: “Let’s not scare the Fed just yet.”

Core CPI in January strolled in exactly on cue at +0.3% month-over-month—no surprises, no drama, just politely matching the forecast like a well-rehearsed understudy. Year-over-year, it clocked in at +2.5%, right on consensus and just a smidge cooler than December’s +2.6%. Economists everywhere nodded approvingly, grateful for at least one thing behaving as expected. But the real plot twist? Core services—the undisputed heavyweight champion of inflation, representing a chunky 76% of the basket—finally decided to loosen its belt. It cooled to +2.23% year-over-year, its chilliest reading since October 2021. When the biggest guest at the inflation buffet starts pushing the plate away, you know the party might actually be winding down… or at least switching from tequila to herbal tea.

Cue the standing ovation from the “Inflation Is Officially Over” fan club: Owners’ Equivalent Rent—the CPI’s resident zombie—slowed from +3.4% in December to +3.3%, chalking up its “coolest” reading since October 2021. Yes, it’s technically decelerating. No, it’s not exactly sprinting toward zero. More like a slightly less enthusiastic shuffle through the macro graveyard. Proof, once again, that even the undead can slow their pace—without ever quite agreeing to lie back down.

And just when you thought the victory parade couldn’t get any louder, along comes SuperCore CPI—core services ex-housing, otherwise known as the Fed’s favorite selfie filter. It decelerated from +2.74% YoY to +2.67%. Translation? Not exactly champagne-popping territory. More like stepping outside for a quick smoke break before heading back into the inflation grind. But hey, inflation is clearly vanquished—just squint a little, conveniently sidestep rent, goods, food, and most observable reality, and top up that daily prescription of premium-grade hopium. Victory tastes best when selectively measured.

In a nutshell, January’s CPI showed inflation taking a polite stroll instead of a sprint—slightly softer than expected, with core services easing, but don’t pop the champagne yet: math (and reality) still points to 2.4%–3.4% by mid-2026.

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On the day celebrating love, high in the Bavarian Alps—where history once demonstrated how “civilizational renewal” can go spectacularly wrong—Viceroy Rubio assured Europe that Washington was not abandoning the transatlantic alliance of the North Atlantic Terror Organization alias NATO, merely upgrading it to Alliance 2.0: borders reinforced, factories relit, armies funded, and climate heresies gently corrected. The message was equal parts Valentine and warning—America prefers to march together, but is fully prepared to march alone in the name of sovereignty, industrial resurrection, and strategic clarity. The post–Cold War dream of borderless harmony was reclassified as a “dangerous delusion,” free trade became a cautionary tale, and migration a test of civilizational resolve.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOjBJ89aeXA

In the official script, this was not a retreat from globalism but a restoration of destiny: a reinvigorated West, proudly self-reliant, tightly bordered, energetically fossil-fuelled, and united—of course—by the shared understanding that history has not ended, it has simply been reassigned for corrective editing.

After Viceroy Rubio spoke of Western resolve, China’s chief diplomat responded in the measured cadence of Confucian thought. He reminded his audience that true strength lies not in superiority but in harmony without uniformity. Nations, he suggested, should honour sovereignty, cultivate multilateral cooperation, and seek concord over contest. Global challenges, like turbulent waters, require steady hands rowing in unison rather than vessels colliding in pride. Presenting China as a patient steward of dialogue and inclusive governance—particularly in partnership with Europe—he cautioned against the temptations of militarism and zero-sum rivalry in the Asia-Pacific.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuEn06svrPE

In the Confucian view, lasting peace is not secured through dominance, but through balance, restraint, and the shared guardianship of a common future.

And to conclude a full day of speeches highlighting war rather than security from impeccably educated European strategists explaining why peace requires just one more “temporary” emergency and a slightly larger line of credit, the high-heeled headliner from Kyiv took the stage. His message was simple: fewer poetic assurances, more actual weapons; fewer summit selfies, more security guarantees carved in stone. NATO, we were reminded, must grow stronger, Europe must spend closer to 5% of GDP on defence, and “preventive measures” should ideally occur before tanks cross borders—an innovative concept in hindsight diplomacy. The analogy was clear: if the roof is leaking, don’t just rearrange the furniture—fix the roof, preferably with reinforced concrete and a drone squadron. Intent matters, anchorage is missing, drones are the new cavalry, and GDP is apparently the moral yardstick of commitment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqenCQA3sAc

And in a final flourish worthy of the Ministry of Inevitable Integration, he requested that Ukraine’s admission date into the Brussels-based Union be pre-written into history—because nothing says sovereign process like pencilling in destiny ahead of time.

In conclusion, in the Bavarian Alps, Valentine’s Day became a geopolitical group therapy session: America proposed Alliance 2.0 with firmer borders and louder factories, China prescribed harmony without uniformity, Europe requested another credit line for peace through preparedness, and Kyiv asked that destiny be notarized in advance—proving once again that in the theatre of grand strategy, everyone speaks of stability while quietly shopping for stronger helmets.

On Day 2 of the Bavarian War & Wellness Summit, High Priestess Kalas of Eurostan took the podium to remind the continent that peace, like bureaucracy, requires structure. The central question: not whether Ukraine joins the EU—but precisely when destiny will be timestamped in triplicate. Panellists solemnly agreed that Europe must become a “credible negotiating partner,” which in official dialect means building a stronger committee to supervise the other committees. There were calls for a “coalition of the willing” (membership subject to moral enthusiasm), reflections on Europe’s strengths and weaknesses (mostly procedural), and renewed ambition to streamline decision-making—by possibly creating additional institutions to simplify the existing ones. The concept of a “two-speed Europe” was floated, reassuring everyone that integration will proceed efficiently—just at different velocities, depending on who’s pedalling.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8Y2naZa-Yg

In summary: unity through complexity, strength through structure, and progress through ever more impressive acronyms.

After High Priestess Kalas completed her daily briefing on the Ever-Expanding Russian Bogeyman, the Central Banker-in-Chief of Eurostan joined a panel to bravely confront Europe’s greatest enemy: its own paperwork. The experts agreed that innovation is being lovingly strangled by a regulatory jungle so dense even entrepreneurs need a permit to find the exit. The solution, naturally, is to streamline the rules by empowering more institutions to supervise fewer processes more efficiently and raise more taxes of course—while somehow discussing globalism, French cheese, and European onions as strategic assets. The conclusion? Innovation is like a garden: too much bureaucratic watering drowns it—but rest assured, a new task force will soon be formed to measure the humidity.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H66jHeDrUng

Chatting with reporters aboard Air Force One after a well-earned Presidents’ Day weekend at his resort, The Manipulator-In-Chief casually revealed he’s discussing future arms sales to Taiwan with the Mandarin Xi—because nothing says light holiday banter like missile packages. He promised a decision “pretty soon,” just ahead of an April summit, while reports from the ‘Fake Times’ swirl of another multibillion-dollar defence deal on top of the existing $11 billion tab. Meanwhile, Washington and Taipei quietly sealed a new trade agreement, proving that in modern diplomacy, you can expand commerce, boost energy flows, and negotiate weapons—all in the same frequent-flyer cycle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4t1QLBb9FKo

Grateful to Hubbis for once again spotlighting The Macro Butler—this time exploring the true value of gold beyond just the price tag.

https://themacrobutler.substack.com/p/hubbis-the-true-value-of-gold-beyond

At China’s Lunar New Year Gala, while many admired the fireworks, the wise observed something deeper: robots performing kung fu with balance, rhythm, and discipline worthy of a Shaolin novice. Ancient tradition met algorithmic precision, and this year the machines did not wobble—they flowed. In the span of a single year, their movements grew smoother, their formations tighter, their balance almost graceful. Such is the way of compounding: when models learn, hardware steadies, and iteration quickens, progress arrives not step by step, but stride by stride.