Hardness of belly and lymph from small excess sugars; pain, bloat, sickness.
Food security, food sovereignty; food resource stabilization, food misinformation, food marketing, food trauma, food apartheid.
The word 'food' looks funny writ lots of times...
What is safest for the body while being held down and harmed?
Starvation, despair.
We can trace from the symptoms we catalog to the world we deserve to manifest. We can trace from the resourcing we recognize as necessary through the challenges we have encountered in establishing that resourcing.
When supply gaps and stopgap decisions are made, how do we avoid life-threatening compromises?
If we chart a new path to travel, there is some place to go. On one accessible path, there would be no way to avoid some one thing without entertaining some new thing; here is another possible path. And here is another possible path.
Cleansing fresh vegetables and fruit in combinations that support the nutrient needs of the body have been starvation in the past, impossible or unabsorbable, but are no longer the same as before.
Despite the murky dark, something new is possible now.
Somatic vehicle weeps dark matter tears, yearns entrenched dreams of healthy air and strength and reconstruction of detoxification pathways.
Thrashes in its prison.
Begs silent screaming hope, relief for light and function.
Make the prison pretty enough, no one will suspect imprisonment --- until they're caught themselves in the same trap.
Bars solid, doors clapped shut.
Maybe all are done for.
But is it locked?
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"What is everyone eating from day to day? Are we eating nourishing foods? Are we eating poisons? Are we eating nourishing poisons?" ... "What are we eating? And why are we eating it?"

I have been having challenging interactions with packages of chicken livers, because I want to preserve them and respect them in the best possible way. Because of physical disabilities, it has been a great effort to figure out how I could eat just a little and keep the rest frozen, but if the package is larger, that would require me to be able to repackage the livers so that smaller packages could stay frozen until eating.
Because my body benefits right now from having more, I can have more, so that's what I'm doing. But we know it is not good to thaw / refreeze / thaw / refreeze (even one cycle of this after freezing the first time is not good).
So I am constantly looking for better solutions I can implement on my own when I do not have help, because access to chicken livers or turkey livers has been keeping my body alive in significant ways.
And I am also very grateful that I am managing this for the meanwhile, and with heartfelt wishing blessings and safety and respect to chickens and turkeys.

I don't know what will happen most of the time before I go into the kitchen, which is a great undertaking each time with some questions about how well I will be able to function / cognate.
This morning I am considering how to get spelt nutrients, because some of our food was found to be not safe and other necessary components are missing.
I wanted to sour some spelt flour overnight, but did not manage to start this yesterday and some challenges are seeming to prevent me from starting it today (I think).
There is some spelt cereal, though I need to be careful not to have very much raw milk if I have that cereal.
I think what I may try —- what has worked fairly well in the past —- is to lightly cook livers in a skillet with farm butter, lightly steam asparagus in a little steamer basket, include some fresh sprouts if I can find them (I think there may be some alfalfa I can use), and maybe I will add berberé again this morning. I can add a peace of fresh fruit. Maybe a little bit of sunflower seeds or pumpkin seeds. There is seaweed sauerkraut I have been eating, some small portion on the side of the bowl.
It has been good for me to add spelt bread to this, but without that, and unfortunately I think without carrot salad —- carrot + carrot greens salad is so helpful when we have carrots with healthy green tops —- I think I could still do radish salad with radishes and radish greens. I think I could even possibly try chopping it tiny with the chopper machine the way I do with the carrots. Radish salad! That seems like a very good idea, I will probably not chop it today because that is a lot of work. But I will probably add radishes too. Yesterday I steamed them and it was delicious.
After I eat this meal... then it may be good to have a very little bowl of spelt cereal with raw milk to have those nutrients also.
The combinations of these things always have to be very precise and where I am not able to be as precise as needed, there are various consequences.
We have not had food money recently and there is a freezer problem —- a new freezer must be purchased, so that is a whole set of conversations —- but also, we are doing so much better than last year.
Praying for food successes and strength and physical repair.
Blessings to food and to all living beings.