It is like I was always cursed to think about the future....it always seemed hard for me to enjoy now....I was so afraid of the coming pain...I was haunted...

Maybe i am week after all cause it seemed like everyone was good at hiding whatever it is that made them sick...they may be hiding in the loudness of the world or in their hatred... in their laughs in their screams or just in their days....they didnt get consumed in it...they rolled with it....cause maybe after all maybe my weakness had gotten too immersed in me and taken over my whole self...my weak blood won me over and i was just torpid silly mortal too weak to feel...too week to fight ...too dull to bring light..too feeble to to exhale...to breath...to live.too numb to feel.

And suddenly dying will not be the scariest.the thing that will be scary is existing and surviving it

Hey guys I am starting up this new channel...you can find poetry and writings ...those type of writings that just hit you....all your pain that you wish you be explained...join

Here is one

......And at times when I look deeply into myself I find this piece of me that has fallen in love with the pain.I saw this part of myself dancing together with the demons that once frightened me.i saw myself holding the hands of the devils that once strangled me.i witnessed myself and them sitting around a table and drinking wine joyfully like they haven't once drunk the blood that poured from my wrists....That part wasn't small at all...it has absorbed the parts of me I thought I had once and it had made them crave hurt...it was then that I knew the chance of me healing beyond all circumstances is long gone and never looking back.......
@wordsofpain🖤

I am like that cheese that becomes alone at the end of that nursery rhyme

There is pain with out love but what if there is actually greater pain in love🖤

Do people ever realize how hard it is to not live in lord?To not be sure whether you are being watched over or not.To not know what you will do with your problems when you run out of choices and to have nothing to look up to....DO THEY???Not having faith isn't a fuckin choice....its not something you do out of levity .....when you repeatedly get beaten by challenges....serious problems that get close to killing you and you give up that's when you lose hope.....Nothing ever embellishes a soul than living with the lord ....Things around you just can't make that happen...
@Wordsofpain🖤