Just for a little boost remind yourself where you were last time and even if situations haven't changed much or have changed a whole lot you are still here today.

He has this peaceful life to envy.

Being back home strikes all the same old feelings as fresh as new. From the dents on my mother's and father's face to a random space on the corridor where major fights went down, each space has a story of its own. Trying not to be triggered by it is another story.አምልጣችሁ የማታመልጡት ነገር የለም?....ሊውጣችሁ አሰፍስፎ የሚጠብቅ።
In each encounter I am reminded of how much of my father is "me" to a point where I am doubting if ever I was given space to have a part of me without the marks of my mother or father who also are resluts of their parents.
In every thought there are so many stories of forgiveness written. Behind being reminded of voices shouting constantly I am also reminded that there is also silent "I forgive you"s given for me to stand here sane today to remember it.
I am reminded mostly of all the burden of what I have to not pass to innocent souls and all of the things I have yet to relearn and most of all why it is important to forgive my parents for whatever wrong they did in raising me and my siblings. I realize that me and them are still liitle children both walking in the same shoes....paying the same debt we didn't acquire....both remenants of a long line of unspoken trauma. As I sit here teary eyed writing this overhearing my mom talk I only feel love(with all its bits of guilt,anger,regret, extreme attachment,reliance......) and all I can do is forgive her. Its feburary 15th and I am still understanding that forgiving that little me has a lot to do with forgiving them.
-Yeab T