#friendship #friends

When I was in college, I had a ton of friends. Then life happened, no more free time to hang out and these friends became acquaintances. I'm 40 now and literally have only one friend who I talk to maybe once a month cause we both are really busy with work, families, etc. On the other hand I have one or two old work colleagues who I've known for 20 years and we kept in touch. It used to bother me a lot before. Now I realized it's just a part of adult life.

nonamebrik

listen 🎧

Friendship is a mutual affection shared between two people who care for and respect one another. Your closest friends are those you can rely on in times of need, who you can laugh with, whose company you enjoy and who you communicate with on a regular basis.

JULIE BASSET

listen 🎧

I don't have any friends. I find interacting with people draining, and I don't enjoy socializing. When I'm off work, I just want to relax and recharge.

I'll add that I'm autistic and apparently come off as "odd" to people, so I've found that getting friendly with people just seems to give them permission to point out that they think I'm weird, and demand explanations.

I like to keep to myself and not bother anyone. If people find this offensive, that's not my problem.

benefecial_step9088

listen 🎧

I have a few friends, most of them live a ways away, and most of what we do together happens via the internet. I consider myself lucky.

It is extremely common for adults to have few or no friends, now. There are some sociological studies on this, and many of them posit that we don't really have the social spaces that foster friendships anymore.

There's a term "third place," as in, a place you regularly go besides work and home. Church is one example, but a lot of us don't go to church anymore, and even when we do, it doesn't really serve the social role terribly well anymore.

Diabolical jazz

listen 🎧

#rest #relax 🌴🍍

Spending time with friends really helps me. Reading fiction, walks and hikes, going to anywhere where I can see a body of water, napping, sitting outside in a lounge chair and listening to the birds, playing with my kids, dancing or other fun active activities. I have to schedule it and try to stick to it, or I have the same problem. It’s hard to stop pushing and give in to it, but if you consistently rest you can keep moving forward longer. Keep fun in mind. You don’t have to be the best at resting.

listen 🎧

I'll go against the grain here but f*ck rest. If going hard for 6 months and burning out for 1 works for you but sucks, it's not the worst case. Some people don't need as much rest.

If you're dead set on it, break your rest down like you would any other plan. I have daily rest, weekly rest, and monthly/bimonthly rest depending on my schedule. Daily rest would be like reading or cooking or going for a walk. My personal weekly rest is spending a day drinking with friends over the weekend, and then monthly rest is getting away for a weekend to go camping/hunting alone or with a friend or two.

Plan a vacation for 4-6 days and unplug every couple months. I've noticed that if my phone is within reach, I'm not really resting so that's another rule I have.

by yutrahkill11

listen 🎧

Aside from the solo activities like walks, gym, reading fiction, tv, etc, I find I like to relax around my friends. When I'm by myself, even my leisure activities can start to take on a productive mindset so dinner with friends, board games, zoo, movies, out etc helps me unwind.

by shepardcommanderSR2

listen 🎧

Music and art are two things that put me into a flow state—but they are also skills that I can intentionally work on to improve. To me, engaging with those activities is both working on a skill (productive) and relaxing because I get the benefits of being so focused on something that I'm not thinking about stresses. If I'm worried about Iosing myself to time, I'll set a timer and let the alarm tell me when it's time to come back to earth.

I can pick up a guitar and play for 5 or 10 minutes, or sit down and doodle freely or work on an already started project for whatever amount of time I can.

Otherwise, I like to listen to things that feel like learning—podcasts, audio books, etc while I do dishes or laundry. It's partly to help me keep track of time though. If I listen to a 30 min podcast, then I have a built in timer for 30 minutes that I can use for whatever.

by waygono

listen 🎧

Few things are more satisfying than kicking back and relaxing in a sparkling space with dust-free surfaces, freshly made beds, and fingerprint-free...everything. But getting your home to that point might not be exactly how you want to spend your time.

listen 🎧

I used to have what I called "self care Saturdays". I would sleep in, drink coffee and then deep cleaned my apartment. I love cleaning so it never felt like a task. I would also make lunch for myself, my sister and my mom. It always felt super relaxing because I love doing both and it's also productive. Then I'd finish my day with showering, shaving, skin care etc. Took ~2h for myself and spent them in the bathroom. I work full time while being a full time college student and this helps me prevent burnout.

by pulicaaaa

listen 🎧

#pets #cats #dogs 🐈 🐩

Everyone I know has pets. Some of them clearly get a lot of joy from them and don't find them a hassle. Others struggle constantly with problematic pets that need a lot of money and time invested in them, yet they still get more. Why do they do that?

Personally, I have high standards for hygiene, I'm allergic and I don't want to invest the time and money.

by my_milliom_alt

listen 🎧

On my 10th birthday, I got a puppy. I was so shocked—I had wanted a dog for as long as I could remember—and so overwhelmed with happiness that I burst into tears. For the next 14 years, Happy, a beagle, charmed everyone he met. And when he passed, all of us who had known him mourned, as we would for any loved one. Two in three American households have a pet—that is, an animal kept primarily for companionship. And despite the fact that these housemates may bear scales, fur, fins or feathers, people often view their animals as family members. In 2017 we spent an estimated $69 billion on our animal companions and untold hours caring for them.

by ScientificAmerican

listen 🎧

Do you have a dog at home? If so, you know that special feeling you get when you arrive home after a long day of school to be greeted with a wagging tail and a few excited licks to the face. When you experience the unconditional love of a dog, you know why the dog is called “man's best friend."

Maybe you have a cat at home instead. When you're down in the dumps, your furry and purr-y friend is sure to be there to snuggle up beside you to let you know everything is going to be just fine. Cats make great cuddle buddies any time of the day.

by wonderopolis

listen 🎧

Animals have something to offer everyone. Whether it is company or protection. It is apparent though that many of the characteristics we see in domesticated animals are bred into them as a result of humans naturally selecting the features they desire. Some dogs are bread to be placid whilst others to herd sheep’s. Some horses are bread for speed whilst others for stamina. What does this tell you? Animals are kept because we can benefit from them, this innate human nature. To do what we can for ourselves.

by Keele

listen 🎧

Pets have evolved to become acutely attuned to humans and our behavior and emotions. Dogs, for example, are able to understand many of the words we use, but they’re even better at interpreting our tone of voice, body language, and gestures. And like any good human friend, a loyal dog will look into your eyes to gauge your emotional state and try to understand what you’re thinking and feeling (and to work out when the next walk or treat might be coming, of course).

by helpguide

listen 🎧

#sayingno #psychology

My anxiety was too bad to come up with clever ways of saying no so I went the cold turkey method and just started bluntly saying "Nah I can't". You really find out who likes you for you, and who previously liked you because you always said yes. But my god the amount of times the past few years I've been cussed out, judged, threatened, and once even punched in the face. All for saying no. It is an absolutely wild world we live in, I'd highly recommend learning more clever and proper ways to say no. Donэt do my method unless you're absolutely ready for confrontation.  Plus side, my business is handled quickly now. It also expanded into other skills and now I am super good at making split decisions on a whim. That's also an often underappreciated skill. Sometimes stopping to take time to think about a choice and the consequences can lead to more consequences. Make a choice and deal with any consequences later! 

by cabavion

listen 🎧

100% of the time someone that's not my boss tells me to do something like this i say something to the effect of "I can't, i'm swamped with.." and then list every single thing i can think of that i need to do in the next week or so. Eventually they get the point and stop asking. If you do something for someone once they'll just ask for more.

by PatrickMorris

listen 🎧