Meet Carmilla, The Human Bookmark. A superhero blessed with an oddly specific gift. She can instantly tell you the exact page where you stopped reading any book… but only if she has never read that book herself. Hand her a random novel, textbook, or 700-page fantasy saga, and she’ll confidently point to your last page without hesitation. Unfortunately, the moment she becomes interested and reads even a single chapter, her power vanishes completely for that book. Her greatest enemies are spoilers, unfinished trilogies, and her own curiosity. Despite possessing perhaps the least useful superpower in history, Carmilla takes her duties very seriously and proudly patrols libraries, bookstores, and book clubs in search of readers who have lost their place. 📚🦸♀️
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Maerwen Targaryen
✶ 𝐄𝐍𝐆|𝐕𝐀𝐋 .𝐎𝐂. @AncientValyria once my whole world now in ruin
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Meet Ellie. The one who possesses a power so extraordinary that scientists refuse to study it and governments pretend it doesn’t exist. At any moment, Ellie can sense when someone, somewhere in the world is about to sneeze.
Not their name. Not their location. Not even the exact time. Just a sudden cosmic feeling that a sneeze is loading. What’s even stranger is that he can somehow describe the person.
“A sneeze approaches! The sneezer appears to be a middle-aged man wearing a green shirt… or perhaps a curtain. The vision is unclear!”
Every time his powers activate, Ellie dramatically points at the sky and yells:
“PREPARE YOURSELVES!”
The public immediately panics. Nothing happens.
Not their name. Not their location. Not even the exact time. Just a sudden cosmic feeling that a sneeze is loading. What’s even stranger is that he can somehow describe the person.
“A sneeze approaches! The sneezer appears to be a middle-aged man wearing a green shirt… or perhaps a curtain. The vision is unclear!”
Every time his powers activate, Ellie dramatically points at the sky and yells:
“PREPARE YOURSELVES!”
The public immediately panics. Nothing happens.
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Meet Emmet. Prince Yawn.
He can make anyone yawn instantly. Anyone. Anywhere. At any time.
Unfortunately, this includes himself. Especially himself. The moment he uses his power, a chain reaction begins.
“Behold my ultimate attack—”
YAAAAAWN.
The villain yawns. The civilians yawn. The police yawn. The pigeons yawn.
Emmet yawns so hard he forgets what he was talking about.
His most famous battle lasted only 18 seconds. A supervillain threatened to destroy the city with a giant laser cannon. Emmet arrived dramatically and unleashed his strongest attack: THE MEGA YAWN.
Within moments, the villain was napping. The villain’s henchmen were napping. The mayor was napping. The laser cannon operator was napping. Even the giant laser cannon somehow looked sleepy.
The city was saved. Nobody remembers how.
He can make anyone yawn instantly. Anyone. Anywhere. At any time.
Unfortunately, this includes himself. Especially himself. The moment he uses his power, a chain reaction begins.
“Behold my ultimate attack—”
YAAAAAWN.
The villain yawns. The civilians yawn. The police yawn. The pigeons yawn.
Emmet yawns so hard he forgets what he was talking about.
His most famous battle lasted only 18 seconds. A supervillain threatened to destroy the city with a giant laser cannon. Emmet arrived dramatically and unleashed his strongest attack: THE MEGA YAWN.
Within moments, the villain was napping. The villain’s henchmen were napping. The mayor was napping. The laser cannon operator was napping. Even the giant laser cannon somehow looked sleepy.
The city was saved. Nobody remembers how.
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Meet Raven. The Bathroom Oracle. They know exactly how many people have peed anywhere in the world on any given day. Ask them how many people used the restroom in Tokyo before noon? They know. Curious about how many people peed during a football match? They have the numbers. Unfortunately, that’s all they know. They can’t predict the future, solve crimes, or even tell you who those people are. Their power is entirely limited to global urination statistics. Despite this, they insist on dramatically announcing their findings at inappropriate moments, such as weddings, business meetings, and birthday parties. Their catchphrase? “According to my calculations, 4.2 million people have peed since we started this conversation!” 🚽
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Meet Michael. The Human GPS for Ducks 🦆 He can instantly determine the exact location of every duck. Every single one. Swimming ducks. Walking ducks. Sleeping ducks. Suspicious ducks.
The information floods his brain at all times.
“Three ducks near the fountain.”
“Seven ducks behind the supermarket.”
“One duck has entered a bakery and appears to have no clear objective.”
Unfortunately, his power works only on ducks.
Not criminals. Not missing people. Not his own car keys. Just ducks.
The information floods his brain at all times.
“Three ducks near the fountain.”
“Seven ducks behind the supermarket.”
“One duck has entered a bakery and appears to have no clear objective.”
Unfortunately, his power works only on ducks.
Not criminals. Not missing people. Not his own car keys. Just ducks.
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MO
chronically online just for my baby devora and closest only
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May the Professor Autocorrect who can instantly detect every typo in the world.
Every typo. Everywhere. At all times. Her mind is constantly screaming.
“Someone misspelled ‘definitely’!”
“Apostrophe misuse detected!”
“THERE’S A ‘YOUR’ WHERE A ‘YOU’RE SHOULD BE!”
She has never known peace.
Her greatest battle was opening a YouTube comment section. She lost consciousness immediately.
Her catchphrase?
“I can fix her.”
She’s talking about grammar.
Every typo. Everywhere. At all times. Her mind is constantly screaming.
“Someone misspelled ‘definitely’!”
“Apostrophe misuse detected!”
“THERE’S A ‘YOUR’ WHERE A ‘YOU’RE SHOULD BE!”
She has never known peace.
Her greatest battle was opening a YouTube comment section. She lost consciousness immediately.
Her catchphrase?
“I can fix her.”
She’s talking about grammar.
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charmaine f
in me unfurls a liturgy of stars, anointed by nocturne’s benediction and alvero’s fondness ♡
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