Warning: if you're not autistic then you're not gonna like them

I recently discovered that my mother has been typing the names of as-yet-uninvented mental conditions into Yahoo's search engine: 'delusion syndrome teenage', 'over-active imagination problem', holistic behavioural stabilizers'.

When you type 'delusion syndrome teenage' into Yahoo, the first page it offers you is to do with Cotard's Syndrome. Cotard's Syndrome is a branch of autism where people believe they are dead.

My body has been replaced by a shell.

My internal organs are made of stone.

I have been dead for years.

They believe that I have some emotional problems. I think that is why they do not want to burden me with their own. What they don't seem to understand is that their problems are already my problems.

I have decided that the best way to get my parents to open up is to give them the impression that I am emotionally stable.

Pansexuals are sexually attracted to everything. Animate or inanimate, it makes no odds: gloves, garlic, the Bible.

I swear oli sounds like a villain 😭😭😭😭😭

I smile because I want him to believe we have a chummy rapport.

He smiles because he thinks he is a good father.

Enough for today. Those were the first five pages

I'm lord Henry

Oh the richard i am

I think I am Richard Papen
And my friend here is Henry Winter.....