Cop or nah?

Whoever wrote these headlines had a field day

𓀟 𓀟𓀕

𓁆𓁌 𓀠𓁀

Real

I own a coop of chickens. I think a few months ago, when trying to get inside the coop, I scraped my thigh on loose chicken wire, and it started bleeding. My chickens smelt it and tried pecking at me, but I obviously closed to door to the coop and went inside. Later that night, I awoke to scratching at my door and I heard the clucking of my chickens beneath the crack at the door. Moments later, they figured out how to open the door and swarmed at the gash in my thigh. I picked up the firearm behind my headboard and started firing. Each chicken died quite easily, and I went back to bed and decided I’d clean the mess up tomorrow. I woke up again the next hour, and the chickens were actually zombie chickens, and they smelt really bad. Everyone knows you can’t kill zombies, so I died that night. Typing this from hell. Thanks for the read.

# Ì̵̛̈̐͋̑̍̐̆ ̪̻͘ ̴̗͋́͌̔̽͑̑̾͘F̴̈́̏́ ̐̂̚ ̏͠ ̱̫͎͉͇͓̣͖̘͍E̷̡̥̲̙͇̲̓͋̆̽͆̚Ȇ̵͍̘̱̖̱̗͆̔̕ͅ ̣̱͎͈̗͜L̴̂͌ ̀͂̈̈́͠ ̛̪̐͂ ̴̡̫̙̼͚̩̫̞͔̰̃̑̀̕Q̵̉̀́ ̢̹̮͉͚̥̝̍̄U̴̢̻͉͕͇̞̱̠͕͓͑̓Ĩ̴̀̅͋̐̇̉̄̄́͒̆̐͘ ̟̭̦̱̹͎̘Ṫ̷̝͚̮̥̮̼̭̰͍̋̌̅̉͆͂͘̚͜Ę̸̛̲̭̥̫̭̱͓̘̬̤͈͔̪͑̔̆̃̅͋͛͝͝ ̴̧̭̭̭̫͇̯̬̣̺͇͇͗͛̑̌͘͜Ḣ̸̖̥̖̦̺͍̜͖̥̲͙ͅŨ̴͘ ̡̛̽̈̽Ń̸̛̦̙̤̙̲͎́̋͌͌̒̀̑͒̍̏̀̉͘G̷̢͔̤̱͍͉̣̘̗̟̰̺͎̩̐͑͂̄͂͜͠R̸̔̉̍̉̀͋͆̇́͠͝ ̘̌̀Y̷͎͖̫͙̋̋̎͊̋͒̎̏̀̈́