Yes. Also, spoons should dispense milk (via the handle from an external reservoir) so that every bite of cereal is crispy. The amount of cereal that gets soggy sitting in a bowl of milk is mind-boggling.

Look at this guy, just giving discarded jokes away for free on the internet.

https://twitter.com/the_kyle_mann/status/1500293453355184130?s=21

I'm not sure what I'd say, other than, "You seem a little crazy. Please don't hurt any of us . . . especially if I have to let you go for being crazy."

https://nypost.com/2022/03/06/employers-need-to-reach-out-for-mental-health-issues/

Making jokes come true is their specialty.

Own the bigots with a non-binary shirt available in exactly two gender-specific cuts.

Fact of the day: A woman is an adult female.

No questions asked.

“This apple is delicious,” they all said, even if it wasn’t.

But she can't even tell you what a woman is . . .

Ask her about countries led by male "women." Would they go to war?

https://twitter.com/_hadleygamble/status/1501249006034468870?s=21

Disney CEO Bob Chapek wants you to know that he's a groomer, too.

I'd also like to thank Facebook for funding this fact check with a generous grant. Hoax satire is dangerous. I'm just grateful that Facebook is doing their part to protect us from it.

How can they return to work if they all died from being unvaccinated?

https://thehill.com/policy/transportation/aviation/597715-united-airlines-letting-unvaccinated-employees-return-to-work

They’ve always enforced their policies selectively and unevenly. At least in this case they’re admitting it.

https://twitter.com/reuters/status/1502036658979495940?s=21

This is so dangerous. What if his attacker strikes again?

That's quite a headline.

https://twitter.com/axios/status/1502346743056318468?s=21

“I’m the CEO of this company. Now tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

https://twitter.com/thedailybeast/status/1502419154237853704?s=21

I wasn’t convinced before, but now I’m pretty sure nuclear war is bad.

"Maybe kids that young [kindergarten to third grade] shouldn't be thinking about sex at all." — @billmaher

Are dumb tweets like this a side effect of the vaccine?

Pfizer CEO says fourth COVID shot "necessary" or there's no chance he'll hit his revenue projections for this quarter.

Just overheard a woman at the gas station complaining about prices. I asked why she's so upset and she said she's a single mom working two jobs. She can't afford $5/gallon gas. So I told her to stop whining and buy a Tesla. And I recommended that she pay cash to save on interest.