We fall, we stand and we keep on going, that's how life goes on. But sometimes you fall so hard, that you let everything go, you lose your will to try again. You feel numbness not just in your body but in your soul too. Darkness takes over, everything feels so heavy and time slows down in that moment. You hardly breath and do not have any thoughts left. That's how you die, from the inside.🐺

What up?

I hope everyone understand me...

Having backpain sucks and you can't even call you sick

Mega Course List

1. The Complete 2020 PHP Full Stack Web Developer Bootcamp
Duration: 48.5 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/the-complete-php-full-stack-web-developer-bootcamp/?couponCode=STAY-SAFE

2. AD’s Hacker 1.0: Extreme Advertisement Hacking
Duration: 1 hour
https://www.udemy.com/course/ads-hacker-10-extreme-advertisement-hacking/?couponCode=0B857434C3AD0C63E5C6

3. Python Programming Beginners Tutorial : Python 3 Programming
Duration: 13.5 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/a-laymans-guide-to-python/?couponCode=PYTHON_JUNE

4. 2020 SEO For Beginners: Boost Your Website
Duration: 25 mins
https://www.udemy.com/course/seo-for-newbies/?couponCode=SKILLS2020

5. Optimization Using Pattern Search Method: MATLAB Programming
Duration: 1 hour
https://www.udemy.com/course/directsearch/?couponCode=FREE4U

6. Android Malware Analysis - From Zero to Hero
Duration: 1.5 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/android-malware-analysis-from-zero-to-hero/?couponCode=43ADD99BE2CE05BE9FFD

7. After Effects : Learn Kinetic Typography and Freelancing
Duration: 2.5 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/learn-kinetic-typography-and-freelancing/?couponCode=22BA0F8C7913DAD1D0F1

8. An Introduction to Python (Volume 2)
https://www.udemy.com/course/an-introduction-to-python-volume-2/

9. Practical Web Development: 22 Courses in 1
Duration: 11.5 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/the-complete-web-development-course/?couponCode=DISCOUNTJUNE2020

10. NLP with BERT - IMDB Movie Reviews Sentiment Prediction
https://www.udemy.com/course/nlp-with-bert-in-python/

11. The Ultimate Cyber Security and Ethical Hacking Course 2020
https://www.udemy.com/course/the-ultimate-cyber-security-and-ethical-hacking-course/

12. The complete gRPC course [Protobuf + Go + Java]
Duration: 6 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/the-complete-grpc-course/?couponCode=3690727A85113246ADD7

13. GO programming language
Duration: 2 hours
https://www.udemy.com/course/go-programming-language-f/?couponCode=1

What's that?

Bye bye,I wanna sleep.So good night!
It's already 3.15 a.m in Malaysia and I'm not sleeping yet so I'm gonna sleep now

The easiest way to be mature is to suffer more than twice.

I have never felt the feeling of having true friends

i don't believe being mature is about suffering more. It's more about an holistic view and way of acting where suffering is needed the least as possible for all involved.

"suffering is needed" kind of mentality keeps the suffering here. Sadly so many people have thoughtprocesses like that.

Thank you

as long as they still with us appreciate them

Life has been kind to us in many ways. But love has not been. You are walking your path of life, quietly, without any communication and I am doing the same. I have missed you a lot. Despite you being 1000's of Kms under the same sky, I am scared to connect and tell you that I am missing you.

Lately, I have been flooded with billions of thoughts. Of my life has a whole. Everyday passes without knowing its purpose. I think I am going through a phase, where I know not what actually am I doing. I have isolated myself from my wife, my kids, my parents, my brother. I do not want to go out. Ideally sitting in my room, on my desk, procrastinating, listening to music, watching some lectures, eat, drink, masturbate, sometimes look over at my Hydroponics set up. I get no sleep too.

Things that come in my mind are -
1. What am i doing ?
2. I am growing old despite being so young.
3. I want to go into few months of seva at Humcha.
4. Finish the project that I am doing.
5. I need to start saving money. Being 30 and having no savings is limiting me of my bare needs. Had i saved money, I could have saved my flat.
6. I have to let go of the flat.
7. What manufacturing business should i be starting? Even if I wish to start, where will I get the money.
8. What am i actually good at?
9. I have to be physically active and need to work out.