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The 3 triggers of procrastination, and what to do about them
1. The task is difficult.
You can postpone completing a difficult task as long as you break it down into smaller items, you will not succeed.
But when you do, it will change from a large and unsolvable to several less dangerous tasks that you will already be able to cope with.
2. A Boring Task
Many people's lives are set up in such a way that they mostly do boring, uninteresting tasks. And they literally force themselves to do it every time.
You have to teach yourself to make the process enjoyable, at least in part. Put on your favorite music, change the environment, make or buy yourself a coffee.
3. Don't contain rewards.
Why try to do something if you won't get any reward for it? There are several solutions here, and they lie everywhere a little at a time.
Try to dilute that with processes that make you feel good. And as for rewards - reward yourself for every point accomplished.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
1. The task is difficult.
You can postpone completing a difficult task as long as you break it down into smaller items, you will not succeed.
But when you do, it will change from a large and unsolvable to several less dangerous tasks that you will already be able to cope with.
2. A Boring Task
Many people's lives are set up in such a way that they mostly do boring, uninteresting tasks. And they literally force themselves to do it every time.
You have to teach yourself to make the process enjoyable, at least in part. Put on your favorite music, change the environment, make or buy yourself a coffee.
3. Don't contain rewards.
Why try to do something if you won't get any reward for it? There are several solutions here, and they lie everywhere a little at a time.
Try to dilute that with processes that make you feel good. And as for rewards - reward yourself for every point accomplished.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
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Send it to whoever you wish a lot of money to.
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3 psychological tricks for every day
⠀
- Reception 10 minutes: for the procrastinator
⠀
It helps to quickly agree with yourself when you need to start doing something and don't want to. Say to yourself, "I'll take ten minutes... (read an English textbook)." Chances are that by the end of the given period you'll get into it, and things will get easier from there.
⠀
- The appraising gaze: disarm the aggressor
⠀
If you feel someone's eyes on you, look into their eyes for a few seconds, then look at their feet, then back to their eyes. Then look away. The opponent sees this as a nonverbal response: I appreciate you and I don't see you as a threat.
⠀
- Suffering collateral: avoiding conflict
⠀
If someone needs to point out a mistake, but wants to do so without an accusatory tone, try using the passive voice rather than the active verb. For example: "You did not complete this task" replace it with "This task was not completed.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
⠀
- Reception 10 minutes: for the procrastinator
⠀
It helps to quickly agree with yourself when you need to start doing something and don't want to. Say to yourself, "I'll take ten minutes... (read an English textbook)." Chances are that by the end of the given period you'll get into it, and things will get easier from there.
⠀
- The appraising gaze: disarm the aggressor
⠀
If you feel someone's eyes on you, look into their eyes for a few seconds, then look at their feet, then back to their eyes. Then look away. The opponent sees this as a nonverbal response: I appreciate you and I don't see you as a threat.
⠀
- Suffering collateral: avoiding conflict
⠀
If someone needs to point out a mistake, but wants to do so without an accusatory tone, try using the passive voice rather than the active verb. For example: "You did not complete this task" replace it with "This task was not completed.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
"Allow autonomy": 9 tips for parents of strong-children
If your child has a strong and strong-willed character, it is important to understand that he will not always agree with your point of view. This is not necessarily a bad thing. But to make him change will be very, very difficult - education can turn into a struggle for power. It is most important that the child feels that you understand him.
The main thing is to make it clear to your child that you love him very much. Here are 9 tips that parents of children with a strong will should listen to.
1. Remember the age
2. Consider the order of birth
Be honest and fair.
4. Offer alternatives
5. Allow autonomy
6. Provide support
7. Show respect
8. Create orderliness
9. Teach how to regulate emotions
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
If your child has a strong and strong-willed character, it is important to understand that he will not always agree with your point of view. This is not necessarily a bad thing. But to make him change will be very, very difficult - education can turn into a struggle for power. It is most important that the child feels that you understand him.
The main thing is to make it clear to your child that you love him very much. Here are 9 tips that parents of children with a strong will should listen to.
1. Remember the age
2. Consider the order of birth
Be honest and fair.
4. Offer alternatives
5. Allow autonomy
6. Provide support
7. Show respect
8. Create orderliness
9. Teach how to regulate emotions
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
How do you get out of a child's position?
▫️Take responsibility
Stop thinking that someone will make decisions for you. Decide what you need and want, even in the little things.
▫️ Set boundaries.
Don't try to please or be comfortable with anyone. If you're given unsolicited advice, stand up for boundaries and don't allow people to intrude on your space.
▫️Take the clamps off.
Shyness and excessive modesty do not embellish, but only prevent you from communicating in a position of equals. Open up to people and the world, show your strong qualities and finally stop being shy about them.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
▫️Take responsibility
Stop thinking that someone will make decisions for you. Decide what you need and want, even in the little things.
▫️ Set boundaries.
Don't try to please or be comfortable with anyone. If you're given unsolicited advice, stand up for boundaries and don't allow people to intrude on your space.
▫️Take the clamps off.
Shyness and excessive modesty do not embellish, but only prevent you from communicating in a position of equals. Open up to people and the world, show your strong qualities and finally stop being shy about them.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Body Language. Part 1.
Few people think about it, but 93% of our communication is nonverbal. The lion's share of that percentage is devoted to body language. Body language is very well read by psychologists in consultations to better understand their clients.
Here are some hidden gestures to help you read a person's behavior.
▪️Crossing arms and legs
This closed posture means that the person is not taking your point of view or is closed to new ideas.
▪️The folding of the arms into a house.
The gesture symbolizes sincerity and honesty. People usually use this gesture when they are sure of what they are saying.
▪️Head nods
Most often, people often nod when they are worried or don't understand what you are saying. They are trying to make sense of what you are saying.
▪️The running look.
Means the person wants to keep something from you or is feeling guilty about something they've done.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Few people think about it, but 93% of our communication is nonverbal. The lion's share of that percentage is devoted to body language. Body language is very well read by psychologists in consultations to better understand their clients.
Here are some hidden gestures to help you read a person's behavior.
▪️Crossing arms and legs
This closed posture means that the person is not taking your point of view or is closed to new ideas.
▪️The folding of the arms into a house.
The gesture symbolizes sincerity and honesty. People usually use this gesture when they are sure of what they are saying.
▪️Head nods
Most often, people often nod when they are worried or don't understand what you are saying. They are trying to make sense of what you are saying.
▪️The running look.
Means the person wants to keep something from you or is feeling guilty about something they've done.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
🎨Ar-brute: an art that originated in a psychiatrist's office
In French, art brut is rough, raw art. Some call it a budget parody of contemporary art, some call it the work of madmen, but researchers and psychologists are convinced that art brut is the most honest art of all.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
In French, art brut is rough, raw art. Some call it a budget parody of contemporary art, some call it the work of madmen, but researchers and psychologists are convinced that art brut is the most honest art of all.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
No sleep? Four deadly dangers of working at night have been named
- Increased blood pressure
Being awake at night disrupts the activation of the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for proper rest. At the same time, the autonomic nervous system is activated. And the opposition of these parties provokes disorders of the cardiovascular rhythm.
- Obesity
This is a consequence of the increase in cholesterol in the blood, a failure in the regulation of appetite due to incorrect production of melatonin.
- Diabetes
Blood sugar levels rise at night, and it is poorly absorbed by the cells. First, "owls" have impaired glucose tolerance (prediabetes), and then diabetes develops.
- Cancer
Working at night increases the risk of developing cancer. The body is less able to produce melatonin, a natural antioxidant that inhibits uncontrolled cell growth.
- Increased blood pressure
Being awake at night disrupts the activation of the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for proper rest. At the same time, the autonomic nervous system is activated. And the opposition of these parties provokes disorders of the cardiovascular rhythm.
- Obesity
This is a consequence of the increase in cholesterol in the blood, a failure in the regulation of appetite due to incorrect production of melatonin.
- Diabetes
Blood sugar levels rise at night, and it is poorly absorbed by the cells. First, "owls" have impaired glucose tolerance (prediabetes), and then diabetes develops.
- Cancer
Working at night increases the risk of developing cancer. The body is less able to produce melatonin, a natural antioxidant that inhibits uncontrolled cell growth.
How to learn to understand each other better
1. Try to look at everything from your partner's point of view and understand why they feel the way they do, instead of defending their opinions at all costs.
2. Avoid criticism, defensiveness, contempt and withdrawal. These four horsemen of the apocalypse are unlikely to promote understanding.
3. Don't doubt your partner; don't think he or she wants to hurt you. Chances are, he has no secret intentions.
4. Go along if your partner is trying to reconcile.
5. Remember: you are not opponents, but a team. You have no goal to beat each other, no goal to prove the other wrong. You are both going in the same direction, and the point of your argument is to clarify the situation and agree.
6. Accept what just won't happen. Especially if your partner is not going to follow these rules.
7. Repeat to yourself as you begin to get angry: "I want to understand you and help you understand me. That's what our main goal is."
1. Try to look at everything from your partner's point of view and understand why they feel the way they do, instead of defending their opinions at all costs.
2. Avoid criticism, defensiveness, contempt and withdrawal. These four horsemen of the apocalypse are unlikely to promote understanding.
3. Don't doubt your partner; don't think he or she wants to hurt you. Chances are, he has no secret intentions.
4. Go along if your partner is trying to reconcile.
5. Remember: you are not opponents, but a team. You have no goal to beat each other, no goal to prove the other wrong. You are both going in the same direction, and the point of your argument is to clarify the situation and agree.
6. Accept what just won't happen. Especially if your partner is not going to follow these rules.
7. Repeat to yourself as you begin to get angry: "I want to understand you and help you understand me. That's what our main goal is."
What will help you overcome procrastination?
Eat the elephant in pieces.
Divide a big task into several smaller ones.
Give yourself time.
Do the easiest and least energy-consuming tasks first, so your brain will practice and be ready to take on more serious tasks.
Eliminate distractions
Sometimes a change of scenery, visiting a co-working space or sitting in a cafe with your laptop, can be helpful.
Motivate yourself
Immediately after completing tasks, promise yourself something nice. For example, a day where you will only rest or visit your favorite places.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Eat the elephant in pieces.
Divide a big task into several smaller ones.
Give yourself time.
Do the easiest and least energy-consuming tasks first, so your brain will practice and be ready to take on more serious tasks.
Eliminate distractions
Sometimes a change of scenery, visiting a co-working space or sitting in a cafe with your laptop, can be helpful.
Motivate yourself
Immediately after completing tasks, promise yourself something nice. For example, a day where you will only rest or visit your favorite places.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
"Don't corrupt the kids!": 5 myths about sex education
MYTH #1. SEX EDUCATION IS ABOUT SEX
Reality: Timely sex education is the foundation for a child to become a conscious adult, spouse, and parent in the future.
MYTH #2. THEY WILL GROW UP AND FIND OUT FOR THEMSELVES.
Reality: Sex education helps you form a healthy personality, avoid psychosexual disorders and learn to protect your boundaries.
MYTH #3. A CHILD ISN'T READY TO TAKE IN THIS INFORMATION.
Reality: By starting to discuss these topics at an early age, you are building a bridge to a future teenager - which means that in a few years you will have a better chance of being heard.
MYTH #4. SEX EDUCATION SHOULD BE HANDLED BY PROFESSIONALS
Reality: It's the parents' responsibility. A child won't be able to share if something bothers him or her.
MYTH #5. I WON'T BE ABLE TO DO IT.
Reality: If you've already tried talking to your child and something went wrong, refresh your knowledge and try again.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
MYTH #1. SEX EDUCATION IS ABOUT SEX
Reality: Timely sex education is the foundation for a child to become a conscious adult, spouse, and parent in the future.
MYTH #2. THEY WILL GROW UP AND FIND OUT FOR THEMSELVES.
Reality: Sex education helps you form a healthy personality, avoid psychosexual disorders and learn to protect your boundaries.
MYTH #3. A CHILD ISN'T READY TO TAKE IN THIS INFORMATION.
Reality: By starting to discuss these topics at an early age, you are building a bridge to a future teenager - which means that in a few years you will have a better chance of being heard.
MYTH #4. SEX EDUCATION SHOULD BE HANDLED BY PROFESSIONALS
Reality: It's the parents' responsibility. A child won't be able to share if something bothers him or her.
MYTH #5. I WON'T BE ABLE TO DO IT.
Reality: If you've already tried talking to your child and something went wrong, refresh your knowledge and try again.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
How to forgive a grudge: 12 useful tips - learn now
It seems almost impossible to overcome the inner pain and even think about forgiving the offender. However, it is necessary to do it. We share tips to help forgive the abuser.
1. Acknowledge the injustice done
2 Recognize the feelings you feel about the injury
3. Ask yourself how you cope with the resentment
Let the situation go even though you continue to feel anger and resentment
5. Accept: forgiveness does not mean that the injustice is insignificant
6. Leave the responsibility to the offender, but treat him or her with compassion
7. Be prepared that forgiveness is not a one-time action, but a process
8. Accept that you will view the world negatively for some time.
9. Imagine that the abuser's identity is not just about what he or she has done.
10. Think back to how you yourself once behaved badly
11. Remember that you are not alone
12. Realize that your suffering was not meaningless
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
It seems almost impossible to overcome the inner pain and even think about forgiving the offender. However, it is necessary to do it. We share tips to help forgive the abuser.
1. Acknowledge the injustice done
2 Recognize the feelings you feel about the injury
3. Ask yourself how you cope with the resentment
Let the situation go even though you continue to feel anger and resentment
5. Accept: forgiveness does not mean that the injustice is insignificant
6. Leave the responsibility to the offender, but treat him or her with compassion
7. Be prepared that forgiveness is not a one-time action, but a process
8. Accept that you will view the world negatively for some time.
9. Imagine that the abuser's identity is not just about what he or she has done.
10. Think back to how you yourself once behaved badly
11. Remember that you are not alone
12. Realize that your suffering was not meaningless
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Making up for our deficiencies
To avoid becoming dependent on those who do it for you.
🔸Care deficit.
It's great to make up for deficits by taking care of yourself. Revisit your beauty rituals, it's time to get busy doing things that make you feel good. Simply put, take good care of yourself!
🔸Material deficits.
A very common story in relationships. Only when a girl can take care of her own well-being, give it to herself, does her man begin to take care of it. It's like an example to him.
🔸Attention deficit.
It will be made up for by talking to people. Meet people, talk about yourself, do social networking, and you're sure to close this deficit!
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
To avoid becoming dependent on those who do it for you.
🔸Care deficit.
It's great to make up for deficits by taking care of yourself. Revisit your beauty rituals, it's time to get busy doing things that make you feel good. Simply put, take good care of yourself!
🔸Material deficits.
A very common story in relationships. Only when a girl can take care of her own well-being, give it to herself, does her man begin to take care of it. It's like an example to him.
🔸Attention deficit.
It will be made up for by talking to people. Meet people, talk about yourself, do social networking, and you're sure to close this deficit!
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
The 3 triggers of procrastination, and what to do about them
1. The task is difficult.
You can postpone completing a difficult task as long as you break it down into smaller items, you will not succeed.
But when you do, it will change from a large and unsolvable to several less dangerous tasks that you will already be able to cope with.
2. A Boring Task
Many people's lives are set up in such a way that they mostly do boring, uninteresting tasks. And they literally force themselves to do it every time.
You have to teach yourself to make the process enjoyable, at least in part. Put on your favorite music, change the environment, make or buy yourself a coffee.
3. Don't contain rewards.
Why try to do something if you won't get any reward for it? There are several solutions here, and they lie everywhere a little at a time.
Try to dilute that with processes that make you feel good. And as for rewards - reward yourself for every point accomplished.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
1. The task is difficult.
You can postpone completing a difficult task as long as you break it down into smaller items, you will not succeed.
But when you do, it will change from a large and unsolvable to several less dangerous tasks that you will already be able to cope with.
2. A Boring Task
Many people's lives are set up in such a way that they mostly do boring, uninteresting tasks. And they literally force themselves to do it every time.
You have to teach yourself to make the process enjoyable, at least in part. Put on your favorite music, change the environment, make or buy yourself a coffee.
3. Don't contain rewards.
Why try to do something if you won't get any reward for it? There are several solutions here, and they lie everywhere a little at a time.
Try to dilute that with processes that make you feel good. And as for rewards - reward yourself for every point accomplished.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
"Real men don't cry."
By constantly suppressing emotions, you form a sense of resistance. So imperceptibly unexpressed, hidden deep emotions are transformed: aggression into permissiveness, fear into indifference, hopelessness into detachment.
Negativity literally accumulates in your body, and at one moment the emotions become more than you are - there is a breakdown.
Recipe for a cure for resilience:
1. Feel your emotion.
2. Give it a name.
3. Fix it on paper.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
By constantly suppressing emotions, you form a sense of resistance. So imperceptibly unexpressed, hidden deep emotions are transformed: aggression into permissiveness, fear into indifference, hopelessness into detachment.
Negativity literally accumulates in your body, and at one moment the emotions become more than you are - there is a breakdown.
Recipe for a cure for resilience:
1. Feel your emotion.
2. Give it a name.
3. Fix it on paper.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
The law of conservation of energy
- Accept what cannot be changed
- don't relive the past over and over again
- don't try to please everyone
- not be jealous
- close an uninteresting book on time
- not borrow money from friends
- not lie
- don't lose faith in yourself
- don't blame yourself for your decisions
- meditate
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
- Accept what cannot be changed
- don't relive the past over and over again
- don't try to please everyone
- not be jealous
- close an uninteresting book on time
- not borrow money from friends
- not lie
- don't lose faith in yourself
- don't blame yourself for your decisions
- meditate
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
9 signs that a turning point is coming in your life
As we reach a certain age point, we begin to prepare for a "midlife crisis. We anticipate unbearable agony and a joyless old age. Do we really expect a sad turn of events, or there is an alternative story? Psychologist Lubov Revenko tells how to recognize the onset of a turning point in life and believe in a bright future.
1. You are asking existential questions.
2. You act in the heat of the moment.
3. You feel like you are losing your mind.
4. You no longer remember when you slept soundly through the night.
5. The future seems bleak and uncertain.
6. Boredom is overwhelming you more and more often.
7. You have a constant feeling of irretrievable loss
8. You are obsessing over your appearance.
9. You stop taking care of your appearance
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
As we reach a certain age point, we begin to prepare for a "midlife crisis. We anticipate unbearable agony and a joyless old age. Do we really expect a sad turn of events, or there is an alternative story? Psychologist Lubov Revenko tells how to recognize the onset of a turning point in life and believe in a bright future.
1. You are asking existential questions.
2. You act in the heat of the moment.
3. You feel like you are losing your mind.
4. You no longer remember when you slept soundly through the night.
5. The future seems bleak and uncertain.
6. Boredom is overwhelming you more and more often.
7. You have a constant feeling of irretrievable loss
8. You are obsessing over your appearance.
9. You stop taking care of your appearance
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Fear or opportunity?
Fears are the body's adequate reaction to something new, to something that once caused unpleasant consequences, or to something that directly or indirectly threatens one's life.
But there are fears that simply must be overcome. For example, if you have an idea, but to implement it, you do not have the courage, and therefore and perseverance.
It is behind such fears that lies your invaluable potential. The body never generates ideas that it doesn't have the resources to implement. Our thoughts are not random. Think of the opportunities that will open up before you after you overcome your fear. Have you imagined it? Now act!
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Fears are the body's adequate reaction to something new, to something that once caused unpleasant consequences, or to something that directly or indirectly threatens one's life.
But there are fears that simply must be overcome. For example, if you have an idea, but to implement it, you do not have the courage, and therefore and perseverance.
It is behind such fears that lies your invaluable potential. The body never generates ideas that it doesn't have the resources to implement. Our thoughts are not random. Think of the opportunities that will open up before you after you overcome your fear. Have you imagined it? Now act!
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
These are things smart people don't do-never.
- Smart people don't allow themselves to be spoiled.
A smart person does not take insults personally. They evaluate themselves objectively and laugh in the face of unjust criticism.
- Smart people do not forget grievances.
Smart people do not live with revenge and bitterness in their hearts. No, they let go of unpleasant emotions, but they do not forget the abusers. They just change their attitude towards the person, stop trusting him.
- Smart people do not lose their heads.
A stupid and weak person can succumb to emotions and in a fit of anger go to clarify relations. Very often such showdowns end sadly. A smart person tries to keep his sanity in all situations.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
- Smart people don't allow themselves to be spoiled.
A smart person does not take insults personally. They evaluate themselves objectively and laugh in the face of unjust criticism.
- Smart people do not forget grievances.
Smart people do not live with revenge and bitterness in their hearts. No, they let go of unpleasant emotions, but they do not forget the abusers. They just change their attitude towards the person, stop trusting him.
- Smart people do not lose their heads.
A stupid and weak person can succumb to emotions and in a fit of anger go to clarify relations. Very often such showdowns end sadly. A smart person tries to keep his sanity in all situations.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
Emotional coping: how to deal with anxiety without harming yourself or others
When dealing with emotions, we have two basic options: to express them (violently or not) or to suppress them. The second is the most popular, because it does not require much effort, but it saves our time and image in the eyes of others.
What should we do if we can't or aren't allowed to react to our emotions in the moment, if we have to hold them back?
1. Respond to them later.
Something that puts the body to work will help: sports, dance, massage or a body-oriented psychologist.
2. go to a psychologist
And work with him on the question of why life's difficulties are causing you such a heated emotional reaction that your body needs to respond.
3. eliminate the provocateurs of your emotions.
You need to put out the fire of unresponsive emotions-then your body has additional resources to spare. All incomplete cycles of stimulus-cognitive reaction-body response need to be ended.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡
When dealing with emotions, we have two basic options: to express them (violently or not) or to suppress them. The second is the most popular, because it does not require much effort, but it saves our time and image in the eyes of others.
What should we do if we can't or aren't allowed to react to our emotions in the moment, if we have to hold them back?
1. Respond to them later.
Something that puts the body to work will help: sports, dance, massage or a body-oriented psychologist.
2. go to a psychologist
And work with him on the question of why life's difficulties are causing you such a heated emotional reaction that your body needs to respond.
3. eliminate the provocateurs of your emotions.
You need to put out the fire of unresponsive emotions-then your body has additional resources to spare. All incomplete cycles of stimulus-cognitive reaction-body response need to be ended.
Join us for more -> @psychologiesi 💡