Idk if it's the former Catholicism the mental illness the bdsm or what but sometimes I do crave a cilice

There was this Catholic Italian writer in the Middle Ages and when his wife died he was traumatised to find out she wore a cilice and since I was a student I remember thinking: Jacopone, you really don't understand women (no man in the Middle Ages did, you are not special)

Let me give it a try