You think about being a kid too much, like you are stuck there reliving it over and over. The last clear memory you have of childhood is sitting in the corner of the sofa eating the snacks your mom bought for your brother’s birthday. It was late. You and her were the only ones in the living room. And then everything changed.
You remember everything that happened after that. You were frozen, stuck in place, watching it all unfold. You didn’t know how to help. You didn’t know what to do. You just sat there, gripping your snack, staring you couldn’t move. You couldn’t scream. You couldn’t cry. It felt like a dream, like any second you would wake up and everything would be normal again.You still remember hearing the question. Why aren’t you doing anything?
And then the next morning came and you were told you were grown now. And you believed it. You thought, Yeah I am grown. I should act like it. It was over. But somehow you were stuck. You never really matured not fully. Even now whenever you fail to help whenever you feel helpless you feel the guilt. It pulls you right back to that sofa gripping your snack when you should have been holding onto them But you never did. And in a way that makes sense.
Because maybe you never knew how. Maybe you were still just a kid, waiting for someone to tell you what to do. But no one did. And now even though you have grown, part of you is still sitting there, frozen in that moment wishing you had done something anything other than just watch.
It wouldn’t change anything for you. But it would have changed something for them. And that would have changed something for you after.
#notesappusedtobeabused
You remember everything that happened after that. You were frozen, stuck in place, watching it all unfold. You didn’t know how to help. You didn’t know what to do. You just sat there, gripping your snack, staring you couldn’t move. You couldn’t scream. You couldn’t cry. It felt like a dream, like any second you would wake up and everything would be normal again.You still remember hearing the question. Why aren’t you doing anything?
And then the next morning came and you were told you were grown now. And you believed it. You thought, Yeah I am grown. I should act like it. It was over. But somehow you were stuck. You never really matured not fully. Even now whenever you fail to help whenever you feel helpless you feel the guilt. It pulls you right back to that sofa gripping your snack when you should have been holding onto them But you never did. And in a way that makes sense.
Because maybe you never knew how. Maybe you were still just a kid, waiting for someone to tell you what to do. But no one did. And now even though you have grown, part of you is still sitting there, frozen in that moment wishing you had done something anything other than just watch.
It wouldn’t change anything for you. But it would have changed something for them. And that would have changed something for you after.
#notesappusedtobeabused
❤8🏆3👍1
My math is that if I have more money than I first thought, then the extra money is to be wasted ,it's a reward for me to spoil myself.
😁5
Did you really love the scars? Did they actually look cool to you, or was it my nakedness that seemed cool?
So today, some girl paid for my taxi (50 birr, btw). I was at Mexico waiting for a taxi and she asked if the taxis take long. I said it’s not long it’s kind of the same wait from here to Megnagna and then from Megnagna too. She said I should go by the train, but I never went on a train to my house because it always gets full, and you have to be shoved in. So I told her she should wait a minute and we started randomly talking. She was nice and to our surprise, a bus took a lot of the people in front of us. Then a taxi came immediately after that. When we got in the taxi, she pulled out her money fast and said 2 people. My dumb ass didn’t think it was for me man. I was shocked. She said, “Abren kowatren ema enen negn mekeflew.” When I said thank you, she said Ende cheger yelem yene konjo ( was feeling myself 😌 I got happy Beka saved my birr and made a friend even though I might not see her again. But man it did make me happy. I was a stranger eko, and when it’s a woman, you don’t have to fear all the way about giving out your phone number. It just feels so genuine man.
Made my day and night guess who has an extra 50 birr
meeeee.
Made my day and night guess who has an extra 50 birr
meeeee.
❤11
Forwarded from Wilderness Of The Soul
There is an island I know
I shouldn’t even mention—
it’s a fairy tale, you see
where no one wears shoes
and no one needs to—
the houses are hobbit-like
with grass on the roofs
and the food is fresh from a nearby farm
every morning the tea sits steeping
on long wooden counters
with toast and jams from local berries—
the crickets always crick here
and the birds call, the kind
that make you stop and say,
“Now that is a beautiful song”—
the sun is hot
without a cloud in the sky
and the beach runs out for a mile
in silky white sand
so that when the tide flows back in the afternoon
it heats up, warm as a bath,
when it rains
you build puzzles, and paint, and read
and light fires that crackle
and smell like cedar saunas
and each night, rain or shine,
you drink wine
and listen to records
while you play games—
and sometimes
you’ll lay in long grass
and chase the stars around the sky
heads close together with the ones you love—
each day is the same
you do what brings you peace—
and the wildest part of it all
is the island is real
my toes are in its sand.
I shouldn’t even mention—
it’s a fairy tale, you see
where no one wears shoes
and no one needs to—
the houses are hobbit-like
with grass on the roofs
and the food is fresh from a nearby farm
every morning the tea sits steeping
on long wooden counters
with toast and jams from local berries—
the crickets always crick here
and the birds call, the kind
that make you stop and say,
“Now that is a beautiful song”—
the sun is hot
without a cloud in the sky
and the beach runs out for a mile
in silky white sand
so that when the tide flows back in the afternoon
it heats up, warm as a bath,
when it rains
you build puzzles, and paint, and read
and light fires that crackle
and smell like cedar saunas
and each night, rain or shine,
you drink wine
and listen to records
while you play games—
and sometimes
you’ll lay in long grass
and chase the stars around the sky
heads close together with the ones you love—
each day is the same
you do what brings you peace—
and the wildest part of it all
is the island is real
my toes are in its sand.
👍1
Now that we have gathered enough evidence, we cannot regret the money we spent.
I admit that I need an education to suffer in.
Bekgn break
( will start my usual crashing out next week when I step foot in the classroom)
Bekgn break
( will start my usual crashing out next week when I step foot in the classroom)
Scribe your soul out
Marvel metawelshhhhh One left I swear to god going back to my nerdy Marvel self.
I did it
Mannn headaches
I finished the whole thinggg
I was indeed illiterate.
Mannn headaches
I finished the whole thinggg
I was indeed illiterate.
🏆1
And favorite line was
“What did you do?”
“I went for the head.”
Which makes me understand it more
“What did you do?”
“I went for the head.”
Which makes me understand it more
🏆1
Maybe I am kind of older now and have become boring, but the excitement isn't there anymore. I mean, I loved it, but it will never be the same as when I first saw it in 8 grade.