I can't have a normal conversation with people. I need you to ask me about stuff otherwise, I am slow.

The way I love explaining things.

Why is the day longer today?

Some days, you don’t feel anything at all not joy, not sadness, just a void. It’s as if your body has ceased to produce even the faintest trace of emotion. You exist in a kind of suspension, where everything is stripped of its meaning. Conversations become tedious, thoughts feel sluggish, and even the act of getting out of bed feels difficult. Sleep no longer offers relief, food no longer brings comfort, and all the things that once sparked happiness or relief now lie flat and lifeless. You aren’t depressed, at least not in the way that word is often defined. You’re simply… numb. Lost in an open silence, you grasp at the memory of feeling, but it slips away like sand between your fingers. You are stopped, neither suffering nor at peace
just drifting,
aimless.

You're not your thoughts, you're who hears them🤎

The weather is having mood swings?

Horton atarfm!

Hmmmmmmmm.🫢

Maybe it's because you care deeply for the environment you keep picking up trash.hmm🤡

I think y'all should leave ,it's all bs here I have officially lost it.

You grew up lying just to make them look good in front of people. You grew up calculating answers so one wouldn’t be seen as the bad guy. You were good at it, really good. All this people pleasing started there, being so careful, like a psychological liar, twisting the perfect answers to keep things peaceful. Every response was crafted with a lie that made them look better or even you you just told what you wished it to be not how it was, made the situation seem brighter. You wanted to feel like everything was under control. But the pleasing didn’t work, did it?
Now, you don’t even think before you speak anymore. You don’t lie like you used to. You try hard to be honest, to let people know upfront that you’re filled with flaws, that you're not the perfect person they might expect. You try hard to be honest, to tell people you’re a disappointment before they even try. Sometimes you wish you could go back to doing what you did before, but you’re tired of it. You're tired of painting other people as something you dream of or even yourself,tired of acting like you’re this perfect human now you're just trying to be.
So now you defend yourself before people even get to know you. You wish people could see your flaws first, so you’d be comfortable later. You tell them the worst so they won’t expect anything better,so you don’t have to lie about it anymore. Because lying is something you did for so long, and the only way to stop it is to show the true colors you have before you start painting again, I show the worst parts of myself first so you won’t see the good. I push you away, not only so you won’t find the good, but so I won’t be tempted to bring it back. It’s like the movies you grew up watching, where you have to fight to see the good. But in my story, there’s no good or bad you can’t predict what’s next, and neither can I.

Ehmm.

You wouldn't understand.

Tewu humble me pleasee.