Why does the Public Education Department (PED) need an Identity, Equity, and Transformation department? What are they trying to transform? And why are they still in masks?

As a middle school teacher, I am strongly against the current trend of keeping secrets from parents. However, I think not all secrets are equal. Let me give three examples of information I found out over the course of last year:

Situation A:
A female 6th grader had a gender support plan meeting in the fall of her 6th grade year. In attendance were my school’s 6th grade counselor, one of the girl’s teachers, and a representative from the district. In the meeting, the girl conveyed that she wanted to go by a different name and they/them pronouns. Most teachers seem to have been notified and began calling her by the new name and pronouns, but I did not find out until the next spring when I actually asked a colleague what was going on with this child.

Situation B:
In the middle of class one afternoon, while I was running around trying to make sure kids were getting started with the day’s work, a girl pointed out a sticker on her Chromebook. (With kids having one-to-one Chromebooks, they often decorate them with stickers like some kids do/did their lockers.) I attempted to redirect her away from her laptop stickers because I was trying to get everyone to work. She started crying because she had been trying to tell me via a certain sticker that she was coming out as gay. I spoke to the 7th grade counselor to let her know what happened and that the issue wasn’t what the girl said, but that she dropped it on me in the middle of class. The counselor talked to the girl, and the girl requested we not bring it up anymore, so I didn’t.

Situation C:
One of my 7th grade boys came in after school to say hi with two female friends who were not my students. In chatting, they somewhat nonchalantly told me that they had seen a female classmate who was one of my students with her boyfriend, and the boyfriend had his pants down. I later relayed this information to my team (the group of teachers who share the same students) and our 7th grade counselor.

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From what I know, parents were not contacted in any of these situations. Should parents have been contacted in all three? Just two?

If it were up to me, I’d definitely contact parents in Situation A. Keeping them out while actively calling a child by a different name and pronouns is unacceptable.

I’m not sure if I’d contact parents in Situation C. A staff member did not witness the incident, so we would be reporting the hearsay of fellow 7th graders. Then again, if it was true that this 7th grader was involved in sexual activity, the parent should know about it.

I do not think parent contact would be warranted in Situation B because the child’s well-being was not at stake, and the announcement did not affect how the child was being treated at school. No changes were made to accommodate the child. To me this would be like a middle school girl announcing a male crush in class one day and then becoming embarrassed about it; I don’t think I would contact parents if the situation quickly resolved.

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I’d be interested to hear anyone else’s thoughts on when parent contact is warranted for this age group. Please note again that all three scenarios I described were real from this past school year.