I was talking to a student today, and we touched upon the importance of self-regulation.
We decided to define this concept so that we both know in which direction we're headed.
Here is how I define it:
Self-regulation is the ability to regulate yourself in the needed direction with the power of your conscious thought.
In other words, you can apply conscious effort to steer yourself in the wanted direction instead of drifting in the autopoilot mode.
We know:
- emotional self-regulation (balancing & harmonizing your own emotional state)
- physical self-regulation (applied to healing the physcial body)
- energy self-regulation (replenishing your energy, balancing your energy)
- self-regulation in learning (consciously regualting your effort, intensity, variety, focus, and routines to achieve the desired result)
Self-regulation involves collecting information (logical and intuitive), and then taking conscious action to steer yourself in the wanted direction.
What qualities must be trained for a person to master self-regulation on all levels:
LEVEL 1 - attentiveness/awareness (to self-regulate your learning)
LEVEL 2 - feeling (being able to listen and understand own emotions and use them as information, not as an excuse)
LEVEL 3 - self- discipline (without it you can't persist to create a lasting change)
LEVEL 4 - energy (without having enough energy all you have is your imagination, but have no real influence on yourself and your environment)
All these skills and levels can be trained at the same time. There is no wrong or right place to begin.
We decided to define this concept so that we both know in which direction we're headed.
Here is how I define it:
Self-regulation is the ability to regulate yourself in the needed direction with the power of your conscious thought.
In other words, you can apply conscious effort to steer yourself in the wanted direction instead of drifting in the autopoilot mode.
We know:
- emotional self-regulation (balancing & harmonizing your own emotional state)
- physical self-regulation (applied to healing the physcial body)
- energy self-regulation (replenishing your energy, balancing your energy)
- self-regulation in learning (consciously regualting your effort, intensity, variety, focus, and routines to achieve the desired result)
Self-regulation involves collecting information (logical and intuitive), and then taking conscious action to steer yourself in the wanted direction.
What qualities must be trained for a person to master self-regulation on all levels:
LEVEL 1 - attentiveness/awareness (to self-regulate your learning)
LEVEL 2 - feeling (being able to listen and understand own emotions and use them as information, not as an excuse)
LEVEL 3 - self- discipline (without it you can't persist to create a lasting change)
LEVEL 4 - energy (without having enough energy all you have is your imagination, but have no real influence on yourself and your environment)
All these skills and levels can be trained at the same time. There is no wrong or right place to begin.
Self-regulation is not self-control. When you control something, you push it down. The direct meaning of the word "depression" by the way is to "push something down".
We don't want to push down our emotions. We want to learn to self-regulate our inner state and consciously replenish our energy levels.
I continue learning self-regulation with my teacher, and I'm attendig a workshop on self-regulating energy levels and emotions on Nov 12. If someone wants to join me, leave a comment or DM me. I'll help you register. The workshop will be in two langugaes: the teacher speaks Russian, and there will be consecutive interpreation into English.
Nov 12, 2022 (Saturday)
10 a.m. - 6 p.m. MSK (GMT+3)
If you live in the US or Canada and would like to attend, you might want to join a US group where the time slots are more convenient for you. Again, just leave a comment.
Managing and regulating your inner state is essential for self-mastery. Many people allow their emotions to consume them, and I choose to learn the opposite - creating conscious thought forms, owning my energy, and regulating my emotions.
We don't want to push down our emotions. We want to learn to self-regulate our inner state and consciously replenish our energy levels.
I continue learning self-regulation with my teacher, and I'm attendig a workshop on self-regulating energy levels and emotions on Nov 12. If someone wants to join me, leave a comment or DM me. I'll help you register. The workshop will be in two langugaes: the teacher speaks Russian, and there will be consecutive interpreation into English.
Nov 12, 2022 (Saturday)
10 a.m. - 6 p.m. MSK (GMT+3)
If you live in the US or Canada and would like to attend, you might want to join a US group where the time slots are more convenient for you. Again, just leave a comment.
Managing and regulating your inner state is essential for self-mastery. Many people allow their emotions to consume them, and I choose to learn the opposite - creating conscious thought forms, owning my energy, and regulating my emotions.
👍1
A failure is a growth opportunity, and not a measure of your capabilities
A lot of non-native speakers want to learn more new words. They are so consumed by the idea of acquiring new, fancy, sophisticated, and more "advanced" vocabulary that they forget to check in with the source (meaning, with native speakers). Do native speakers say so? If yes, in what context? If no, what would sound more natural instead? When people insert "fancy" phrases from a fiction novel they're currently reading in their business conversations (hoping to impress everybody), they sound awkward.
Many students refuse to use simple words because they mistake "simple" for "primitive". Simple is good. Simple helps you to be understood. Simple gets people's attention. Just make sure it's not the predictable kind of simple. Our brain tends to autofill a sentence when it recognizes a phrase it has seen a million times before. That's also the reason why people don't listen carefully. They assume they already know what's going to be said...because it's being said exactly the same way ... again. Clichés are dangerous: they might sound new and "cool" to an English learner, but they actually sound overused and empty to a native speaker. A native speaker's brain immediately autofills when it sees/hears a familiar cliché, and it stops paying attention!
Learning new words is not enough. Learning to feel the language is what you want to achieve, and you can't achieve it by shuffling fancy flashcards in 10 different apps. If you want to learn to feel the language, start writing. You will quickly learn that to write better, you need to read better, and you need to read more. To read better, you need to comprehend faster. To comprehend faster, you need to think better. To learn to think in English better, you need self-discipline and an effective practice routine that has "developing cognitive skills in a foreign language" at its core. Learn to see more than just words. You need to see what mental image people are receiving when they listen to you or read your texts. If you overuse clichés, you don't sound any smarter. You are not sending any specific image, rather a generalization, which is not the smartest move if your goal is clarity in communication.
If you want you high standards to be met and have your texts edited and reviewed by a native speaking professional editor, join the Creative Writing Practice.
The task for Week 3 is to write a creative ABOUT page.
https://community.nataliatokar.me/c/calendar/creative-writing-2-0-352aef
This is a MUST-do exercise for everyone who's getting ready for a job interview in English, sells in English, and communicates with English-speaking customers.
Join today and save your seat at a Friday editing session.
Many students refuse to use simple words because they mistake "simple" for "primitive". Simple is good. Simple helps you to be understood. Simple gets people's attention. Just make sure it's not the predictable kind of simple. Our brain tends to autofill a sentence when it recognizes a phrase it has seen a million times before. That's also the reason why people don't listen carefully. They assume they already know what's going to be said...because it's being said exactly the same way ... again. Clichés are dangerous: they might sound new and "cool" to an English learner, but they actually sound overused and empty to a native speaker. A native speaker's brain immediately autofills when it sees/hears a familiar cliché, and it stops paying attention!
Learning new words is not enough. Learning to feel the language is what you want to achieve, and you can't achieve it by shuffling fancy flashcards in 10 different apps. If you want to learn to feel the language, start writing. You will quickly learn that to write better, you need to read better, and you need to read more. To read better, you need to comprehend faster. To comprehend faster, you need to think better. To learn to think in English better, you need self-discipline and an effective practice routine that has "developing cognitive skills in a foreign language" at its core. Learn to see more than just words. You need to see what mental image people are receiving when they listen to you or read your texts. If you overuse clichés, you don't sound any smarter. You are not sending any specific image, rather a generalization, which is not the smartest move if your goal is clarity in communication.
If you want you high standards to be met and have your texts edited and reviewed by a native speaking professional editor, join the Creative Writing Practice.
The task for Week 3 is to write a creative ABOUT page.
https://community.nataliatokar.me/c/calendar/creative-writing-2-0-352aef
This is a MUST-do exercise for everyone who's getting ready for a job interview in English, sells in English, and communicates with English-speaking customers.
Join today and save your seat at a Friday editing session.
community.nataliatokar.me
Creative Writing 2.0. Week 4. Editing practice with a native speaker | Native-Like Fluency. The Community of Practice
This is a writing challenge for non-native speakers who want to get serious with their writing practice and receive professional feedback.
We will be writing ONE text per week.
The duration of the program is 8 weeks.
Each week we will meet online for ...
We will be writing ONE text per week.
The duration of the program is 8 weeks.
Each week we will meet online for ...
Learning will get easier when people fall in love with effort.
Learning is effective when it’s effortful.
Effortless learning does not bring lasting results, but it’s a beautiful idea to sell. We’re all going to achieve more as language learners when people take serious steps in the direction of believing themselves, and not “experts”, “influencers”, and for God’s sake, celebrities.
Btw, what do celebrities have to do with learning? Why would you even trust someone you don’t know, especially when you DO know that these people are professional actors and can take any role for money? Why would you take the advice of someone who has a totally different lifestyle than you, and most importantly - doesn’t have the results that you’re looking for. They have fame, and they have your attention. But YOU have the power to give or not give your attention to information.
When language learners embrace the idea of effortful learning, they will stop looking for “15-min a day English” solutions. They will not enroll in “3-months-to-fluency” programs. When people wake up to the fact that learning takes time, they will start appreciating the time they have. How long does it take ME to achieve fluency? To remember new words? To read one novel in English? To change my pronunciation? For example, it’s taken me a year to change the shape of my vowels and get to the point where my result is not depending on the circumstances. I reprogrammed my pronunciation autopilot. I don’t know how to learn anything in 15 days. You can learn ABOUT something in 15 days, but it’s not enough time to create a lasting improvement.
When you start respecting your time, you learn to enjoy your effort. I will never become a native speaker, and I don’t want to feed the illusion of becoming one with my time and effort. What I know is that I can achieve native-like fluency, and I’m showing the result of my effort to myself daily.
What I’ve learned over the years is that it takes a very different kind of effort to achieve understanding, whatever you learn. Most people associate learning with “marking new words in an English text”, “sitting through a class”, or “doing endless grammar drills”, but this is learning ABOUT the language. As soon as you get to B2, C1, or as soon as you realize that the result of speaking a foreign language can’t be measured by a test, you stop doing the exercises that will be on the test, and you stop engaging in activities that prepare you for the test. People who need English to get ahead in their career, to build meaningful relationships with people, to share their vast knowledge with native speakers do not need certificates. They need connection and confidence.
To learn connection, you need to apply a different type of effort. You need to learn to be attentive to the target language and to the way you use it, you need to learn to apply conscious effort, to listen carefully (both to yourself and others), to trust your gut, to double-check everything you thought to be true, to self-reflect, to ask for help, to self-regulate your learning, to write (that’s why I’m writing this text in English), and to enjoy the effort you’re putting into becoming a whole different type of learner. Achieving native-like fluency in a foreign language is about becoming, not “studying”.
I have a free course about the 9 essential skills (all human skills) that are required to achieve native-like fluency. If you’re interested, apply for it. Btw, it takes effort to apply, and I hope you’ll like it🙂. Every lesson includes 1 or 2 practical exercises.
Learning is effective when it’s effortful.
Learning to give a lot of effort effortlessly takes time, and I’d rather spend this time enjoying my deliberate practice routine rather than searching for a quick fix. Even the most advanced technology can’t change human nature and the fact that learning something takes time. All serious improvements in life take time. Whatever app you choose to support your learning process, it’s designed to support it, and not to do the learning for you.
Learning is effective when it’s effortful.
Effortless learning does not bring lasting results, but it’s a beautiful idea to sell. We’re all going to achieve more as language learners when people take serious steps in the direction of believing themselves, and not “experts”, “influencers”, and for God’s sake, celebrities.
Btw, what do celebrities have to do with learning? Why would you even trust someone you don’t know, especially when you DO know that these people are professional actors and can take any role for money? Why would you take the advice of someone who has a totally different lifestyle than you, and most importantly - doesn’t have the results that you’re looking for. They have fame, and they have your attention. But YOU have the power to give or not give your attention to information.
When language learners embrace the idea of effortful learning, they will stop looking for “15-min a day English” solutions. They will not enroll in “3-months-to-fluency” programs. When people wake up to the fact that learning takes time, they will start appreciating the time they have. How long does it take ME to achieve fluency? To remember new words? To read one novel in English? To change my pronunciation? For example, it’s taken me a year to change the shape of my vowels and get to the point where my result is not depending on the circumstances. I reprogrammed my pronunciation autopilot. I don’t know how to learn anything in 15 days. You can learn ABOUT something in 15 days, but it’s not enough time to create a lasting improvement.
When you start respecting your time, you learn to enjoy your effort. I will never become a native speaker, and I don’t want to feed the illusion of becoming one with my time and effort. What I know is that I can achieve native-like fluency, and I’m showing the result of my effort to myself daily.
What I’ve learned over the years is that it takes a very different kind of effort to achieve understanding, whatever you learn. Most people associate learning with “marking new words in an English text”, “sitting through a class”, or “doing endless grammar drills”, but this is learning ABOUT the language. As soon as you get to B2, C1, or as soon as you realize that the result of speaking a foreign language can’t be measured by a test, you stop doing the exercises that will be on the test, and you stop engaging in activities that prepare you for the test. People who need English to get ahead in their career, to build meaningful relationships with people, to share their vast knowledge with native speakers do not need certificates. They need connection and confidence.
To learn connection, you need to apply a different type of effort. You need to learn to be attentive to the target language and to the way you use it, you need to learn to apply conscious effort, to listen carefully (both to yourself and others), to trust your gut, to double-check everything you thought to be true, to self-reflect, to ask for help, to self-regulate your learning, to write (that’s why I’m writing this text in English), and to enjoy the effort you’re putting into becoming a whole different type of learner. Achieving native-like fluency in a foreign language is about becoming, not “studying”.
I have a free course about the 9 essential skills (all human skills) that are required to achieve native-like fluency. If you’re interested, apply for it. Btw, it takes effort to apply, and I hope you’ll like it🙂. Every lesson includes 1 or 2 practical exercises.
Learning is effective when it’s effortful.
Learning to give a lot of effort effortlessly takes time, and I’d rather spend this time enjoying my deliberate practice routine rather than searching for a quick fix. Even the most advanced technology can’t change human nature and the fact that learning something takes time. All serious improvements in life take time. Whatever app you choose to support your learning process, it’s designed to support it, and not to do the learning for you.
My learning efforts bring joy because they support the person I am becoming.
And this gives me tremendous confidence that I’m on the right path.
And this gives me tremendous confidence that I’m on the right path.
Some thoughts about learned helplessness, online educational products, and the role of a coach/expert
https://soundcloud.com/natasha-tokar/on-teaching
I remembered about an earlier episode of my podcast about the true role of a teacher. The message is still the same.
BUT!!! my pronunciation has changed😁😁😁
Now, when I listen to this episode, which was recorded 2 years ago, I can clearly hear the problem with my vowels. I couldn't tell the difference between "e" and "a". My "episode" sounded more like "apisode", and "test" more like "tast".
My "o" was a mess, such as in "note" or "rose", or "so".
I'm still falling back into my old pattern at times, but I catch those mistakes quicly
I remembered about an earlier episode of my podcast about the true role of a teacher. The message is still the same.
BUT!!! my pronunciation has changed😁😁😁
Now, when I listen to this episode, which was recorded 2 years ago, I can clearly hear the problem with my vowels. I couldn't tell the difference between "e" and "a". My "episode" sounded more like "apisode", and "test" more like "tast".
My "o" was a mess, such as in "note" or "rose", or "so".
I'm still falling back into my old pattern at times, but I catch those mistakes quicly
SoundCloud
The true role of a teacher and what it takes to help a student become their own teacher
"What avail is it to win prescribed amounts of information about geography and history, to win ability to read and write, if in the process the individual loses his own soul; loses his appreciation of
https://community.nataliatokar.me/c/calendar/grammar-nov-3
Join us tomorrow. The event is free for all the active community members
Join us tomorrow. The event is free for all the active community members
community.nataliatokar.me
📝Grammar Practice: Exercises for Native-Like Fluency | Native-Like Fluency. The Community of Practice
These are regular calls to help community members truly understand and practice certain grammar topics using the best Grammar Books that have been written for and by native speakers.
Listen to this audio message:[grammar (mp3cut.net).mp3]Here is how ...
Listen to this audio message:[grammar (mp3cut.net).mp3]Here is how ...