Decision

The strong person is the one who is willing to make hard decisions. Who actually does make hard decisions. Its all personal, everyone has some sort of decisions in their lives, when they have to decide something that seems hard for them.

And you gotta make sure that you make a decision to do something about it. Not doing anything about it is also a decision. And when you already made a decision, stop thinking and worrying about that, move forward!

Hey people it’s been a while since I posted something in here. I’ve got a lot of stuff going on in my life right now. Also, my mood swings up and down like every other minute. I could feel really happy, than suddenly my mood just drops and I could feel stress with some kinda fear. I don’t know why, it’s weird.

I feel like mentally I became a lot weaker than I used to be. Probably, it has something to do with me missing my family, home, friends. It’s just fucking hard. But of coarse I will get through that. It’s not that big of a deal.

Now I think, I’m gonna be writing more in English, than in Russian. I need to try to focus more on that, starting using less Russian language, so I could get to the point where I will start to think in English. Because now I could easily speak English, I could pretty much understand anything in English, I could read in English, I could write in English. Now I should start to think in English.

That’s my next goal.

Ps. Hope you guys are having some improvements in your journey of learning English as well. Well, if you understood everything in this text, that means your English is already good!

Pss. Дайте знать нажав на соответствующий смайлик, поняли вы этот текст или нет?!

Daaamn, I haven’t seen my family since October 2017!
In three days it’s gonna be two years of me living in the US.

Isn’t that crazy?!

Read!

You should read guys! You should read a lot! You should always read something! You should be like a detective, who’s always looking for books that has some wisdom and philosophy in it. They truly have a huge impact on the way we think and see the world.

Create your own personal library from books, which affected you the most. If you are that person, who says you are just naturally don’t like reading, it just means you haven’t tried it enough. Trust me, there is no person on Earth who likes every book they read. Those people who loves reading, who seems like they always read something, they just figured out what kind of books they like to read.

The same thing for you, in the beginning you just have to start to read books that everyone talks about, that are kinda popular. Try to read ten different books, and I promise that you will definitely like one or two of them. And then after that you will know what kinda books you like, and what kinda books you don’t like.

Why do we always tend to get stuck in our small world in our head, thinking that we’re the only ones who have problems and difficulties ?!

Yes, some people do have an easier life than the others, but all people no matter where they came from face difficulties in life. It might be different kinds of problems, but that’s not the case, we all do have problems in life, or I would say, we all struggle with something..

and understanding that you are not the only one, will make your life easier.

Don’t worry you guys.. I didn’t forget about you. Just had some time with myself, trying to figure out who the fuck I am?!

Well.. I hope you got this part all figured out. Because I haven’t. I don’t think I ever will.. because life is fucking complicated and I don’t think there will ever be a moment of when you will have everything figured out. So maybe I should stop being a pussy and just fuckin’ live, make decisions, take risks, make my own mistakes.. live my own life for god’s sake!

In the meantime, my English is getting real good.. with time, with effort, with a lot of practice, and of coarse livin’ in da states.. it does its own job.
Yay!

Evening.
9 pm.
Flower.
Airplane.
Taking shower.
Speaker.
Music(Post Malone - Congratulations, The Mamas & The Papas - California Dreamin’ [Single], The Scripts - Hall of Fame, Drake - God’s Plan, Michael Jackson - Man in the Mirror, Rigoletto: Act ||| - “La Donna e Mobile”).
Water.
Body.
Warm.
Songs.
Jamming out.
Waves.
15 minutes.
Around.
End.

Get comfortable with loosing

I feel like if you want to win in life — you need to loose a lot at first, or at least be comfortable with it. That’s why people don’t aim high, because they’re so terrified of loosing.

It’s normal. I’m afraid of loosing too. But i understand that if you want to win in life, you gotta be comfortable with loosing. It’s life. Loose nine times and win once, — then you are a winner. But you have to be willing to go through those “nine” failures.

So get comfortable with loosing. Sooner you realize that, I’m telling you, life gets so much easier.

I’d like to add that by risking everything and willing to loose everything you have for whatever it is you want — you’re gonna win inevitably. It might not happen over night, in a year, in five years, maybe in ten, who knows?!
But it will happen eventually,
if you’ll just keep on moving.
So don’t stop.
Life is a marathon, not a sprint.
A lotta people might be ahead of me right now, because they’re running fast, they’re running the sprint(the short distance), while I’m taking it slowly, because I’m running a marathon, I’m playing the long term game.

Black Lives Matter

You all probably already know what is happening right now in the US. People are mad, angry and they are protesting,

Because of the death of George Floyd, and MANY others, who just weren’t documented.

Because of the discrimination that comes from white people towards other races, especially black people.

Because of the police, which uses its authority in a wrong way. Police are supposed to save lives, instead of taking them away. Of coarse there are many exceptions, but after a certain point it just feels like it’s the police who should be policed these days.

People are just asking for the equality. Equality in civil rights. It’s that simple!

People are sick of the terrible consequences which the white supremacy has caused. And please, don’t get me wrong – I’m not against anyone or anything, I’m just saying the facts. And maybe it’s not my place to say anything about it, but I feel like i need to say this , because that feels like the right thing to do right now.

Things are slowly, but surely changing, and hopefully it’ll bring more good than bad into this world.

I hope you all have a good day 💙

Self-education

In my life, self education plays huge and very important role. When it’s not something that you have to do and you’re just forcing yourself to do it. No. You learn new things because you want to.

People don’t understand, that education is not just school, university or some special training courses. Education does not start and end in a classroom.

Education is life itself. It’s the process of you becoming a person. Process of you becoming an individual.

In that case, everything depends on you. And the older I get, the more I realise that we don’t like taking the responsibility, it’s in our nature to blame someone or something else in life. Instead of accepting it.

Every time we say to ourselves that we don’t have enough time, money, resources, there are all purely excuses, which based on our laziness and the lack of desire.

For the man with the strong desire , there is always something to learn,
He always finds a teacher,
He always finds a time,
He always finds resources.

If only he had a little bit of a desire.

Wanted to write something in this channel for you guys, but nothing really comes out of my mind right now. So I’m just gonna write about that lol.

Yea.. I feel like if you don’t know what to write about in general, just write about what you’re thinking and feeling in the moment. Whatever it is that you’re thinking or feeling right in this moment, just write it down.

And always, always, always write for yourself, like nobody is going to see it. Write about what you’re afraid of writing.

Writing is a therapy.

So use it.

Write your own story. Believe in your own story. Which means you’re going to make mistakes all the time, that’s just life. I make mistakes all the time, because every time, right after I’ve already done something, my mind starts giving me the ways of how I could’ve done it better. And it really pisses me off. But I can’t do anything with that, I just have to embrace it and live with it.

Because I know that — because of that mistake, tomorrow I can do better than i did today.
Something like that 🤷‍♂️

Я перестал писать на моём первом канале потому, что появились вещи, которые мне хочется держать при себе. И поэтому, я более откровеннее могу писать там, где меньше людей.

Или я просто взрослею, и взгляды на жизнь меняются, как у любого разумного человека?!

Или я просто сейчас застрял в комфортной зоне из который боюсь высунуться?!

Новая глава. На новый уровень вышел, думаю. Поэтому из-за того, что происходят со мной такие перемены, мне сейчас по началу тяжеловатенько, я как-будто с открытыми глазами лежу, совершенно не двигаясь в полном ахуе от того, что происходит со мной и вокруг.

Но здесь, так же, как и всегда, надо действовать и двигаться адаптируясь под климат. Неимоверно трудно, но очень полезно для здорового — ума, тела и духа.

Или может Грибоедов всё-таки прав?!

Или может я просто сбился с “правильного” пути немного?!

А что такое “правильный” путь?

Не знаю.

Столько мыслей в голове,
Столько вопросов,

А сколько возможных ответов?!

Зато, я теперь понимаю, почему Шекспир считается великим, и в чём заключается суть вечной Гамлетовской дилеммы.

До следующего раза!