i'm glad that you're brave enough to be here today. always. i'm proud of you; even on times where you can't find yourself between the lines. i'll be proud of you even when you're struggling to open your eyes and heart to the world. i'll be proud of you on days when you feel like healing is a big step for your wounded soul.
i'll stay. i'll stay on days when you feel like you're no longer growing. i'll be there applauding on you for making it out of your bed after not getting up for days because you're busy battling your own demons.
i'll be there. i'll sit with you. i'll congratulate your wins and loses. i'll lend you my hand. i'll tell you that it's okay to be this and that sometimes when you feel like the world is too much everytime.
i'll stay. i'll stay on days when you feel like you're no longer growing. i'll be there applauding on you for making it out of your bed after not getting up for days because you're busy battling your own demons.
i'll be there. i'll sit with you. i'll congratulate your wins and loses. i'll lend you my hand. i'll tell you that it's okay to be this and that sometimes when you feel like the world is too much everytime.
👍1
i'll listen to you, wait for you, hug you. i'll be patient enough for you; because i know what it feels like to force yourself to live in a moment you know you left outside of your front door long ago.
i'll be there, knocking. and i'll tell you that i'm glad. i'm glad that you're still alive.
i'm glad that you chose to exist, even though deleting yourself from this world is way more easier.
i'll be there, knocking. and i'll tell you that i'm glad. i'm glad that you're still alive.
i'm glad that you chose to exist, even though deleting yourself from this world is way more easier.
I'm not sad, I'm just exhausted.
I'm too much of everything and that's the only problem.
When I love someone, it really gets to every inch of me.
And when I'm sad, I remember almost everything that did hurt me. Like it was yesterday.
And when I'm happy, I forget about all the horrible things I passed through.
I'm a person who feels everything deep to their bones.
That's why I'm always feeling tired.
Her.
I'm too much of everything and that's the only problem.
When I love someone, it really gets to every inch of me.
And when I'm sad, I remember almost everything that did hurt me. Like it was yesterday.
And when I'm happy, I forget about all the horrible things I passed through.
I'm a person who feels everything deep to their bones.
That's why I'm always feeling tired.
Her.
Dear myself,
I hope you will always remember that it's okay to take a pause, to breathe, to give yourself a break whenever the world is too overwhelming. Sometimes, things can be so hard but please always remember that you can take one day at a time. No one is rushing you but yourself. So, I want you to thank yourself for making it this far. You can be so messed up and full of chaotic thoughts, but I will always try to love you as you are. Thankyou for being you.
I hope you will always remember that it's okay to take a pause, to breathe, to give yourself a break whenever the world is too overwhelming. Sometimes, things can be so hard but please always remember that you can take one day at a time. No one is rushing you but yourself. So, I want you to thank yourself for making it this far. You can be so messed up and full of chaotic thoughts, but I will always try to love you as you are. Thankyou for being you.
❤1
I can be the kindest person you'll ever meet, but I can also be the most heartless person when you hurt me and the people I love. I always try my best to be patient and understanding. As much as I can, I want to tell myself that a person's wrong behavior has a valid reason. I always try to endure all the pain and keep all my feelings to myself. But I am not a perfect person. Most especially, I am not a robot. I can feel the pain when people hurt me. I get disappointed when the people I love betray me. I get sad when I am disrespected and treated poorly. I get hurt a thousand times and still accept it with all my heart. But after that pain, sadness, and hatred, don't expect me to be the same again. I will never be the same after being hurt constantly and brutally.
— Shiori X
— Shiori X
Sometimes you will lose interest in things you used to enjoy, not because you don't want them anymore, but because your soul craves silence and inner peace. It's sometimes better to lie down on your bed and listen to your favorite music or watch your favorite movie alone, away from your phone and all the notifications that bother you from time to time.
It's sometimes better to devote your time alone and reflect on what you want to do, why you keep tolerating stagnant routines, and why you keep staying in places where you don't belong.
Sometimes you have to pay attention to your body and mind when it tells you to take a break from the outside world, take care of yourself, and rest until you feel like yourself again. The world does not revolve around your smile, your love for someone, or your excitement; rather, the process includes silence, sadness, and solitude.
It's sometimes better to devote your time alone and reflect on what you want to do, why you keep tolerating stagnant routines, and why you keep staying in places where you don't belong.
Sometimes you have to pay attention to your body and mind when it tells you to take a break from the outside world, take care of yourself, and rest until you feel like yourself again. The world does not revolve around your smile, your love for someone, or your excitement; rather, the process includes silence, sadness, and solitude.
Take a deep breath and remind yourself that you can comprehend all of this without worrying about what others will think because this is your life and there are no justifications for putting yourself first.
— Balt
— Balt
She changed
Yes
She changed because she did her best for those who did her the dirtiest
She loved those ugliest parts in people which they were hiding but she was left alone even when she was giving her best shots
She changed because no one tried to learn her love language and she was too exhausted translating it
She changed because she couldn't afford anymore wounds on her soul.
She changed because she had dreams too
She changed because she needed love too
She changed because she decided to love herself
She changed because she needed to live too
She changed simply because she was tired and she couldn't find home and comfort in anyone.
Yes
She changed because she did her best for those who did her the dirtiest
She loved those ugliest parts in people which they were hiding but she was left alone even when she was giving her best shots
She changed because no one tried to learn her love language and she was too exhausted translating it
She changed because she couldn't afford anymore wounds on her soul.
She changed because she had dreams too
She changed because she needed love too
She changed because she decided to love herself
She changed because she needed to live too
She changed simply because she was tired and she couldn't find home and comfort in anyone.
I've been too hard on myself lately. I feel like I couldn't give myself the love that I truly deserve. I feel disappointed for treating myself this way. I know that I am worthy of love and that I am enough, but I still feel so worthless at times. I've been telling myself some harsh words that can also hurt me. I lost respect and love for myself. All I know is that I don't want to hurt myself anymore. I feel the guilt in my heart every time I treat myself poorly. It makes me sad that, until now, I am still learning not to hate myself. I am still learning to forgive myself so that I can finally accept myself wholeheartedly. It's quite sad when I can't even see my worth, but it's sadder when I see myself hurting because of the things that I think about myself. I often think that I am not good enough for everything, and that breaks my heart every time I say it to myself.
— Shiori X
— Shiori X
Dear myself,
I hope you will always remember that it's okay to take a pause, to breathe, to give yourself a break whenever the world is too overwhelming. Sometimes, things can be so hard but please always remember that you can take one day at a time. No one is rushing you but yourself. So, I want you to thank yourself for making it this far. You can be so messed up and full of chaotic thoughts, but I will always try to love you as you are. Thankyou for being you.
I hope you will always remember that it's okay to take a pause, to breathe, to give yourself a break whenever the world is too overwhelming. Sometimes, things can be so hard but please always remember that you can take one day at a time. No one is rushing you but yourself. So, I want you to thank yourself for making it this far. You can be so messed up and full of chaotic thoughts, but I will always try to love you as you are. Thankyou for being you.
❤1
May be she exists.
May be she exists in someone's silent point of view, looking at her in all the gentle way that that he can—by never gazing at her as she is not yet his. He's handling her so careful with du'ās to Allāh to take care of her—all without her knowledge and consciousness of his existence. He talks to her in the most gentle way he could—by never daring to utter a brave 'salām' to her privately, but mentions her name to Allāh more often than she can ever imagine.
May be there's a love that she doesn't know in the door that she thought was closed—and maybe it's purposely closed, because the key is still being carefully crafted in du'ās and self—improvement, so when he comes, she'll deserve him and he'll deserve her.
While she doesn't know where he is, she longingly waits to see his smile, yearning to hear him utter her name like a luxury that she never was able to afford, but paid them through her endless du'as and patience, until qadar finally hand her hands to his. Until he can finally call her half of his dīn.
May be there's always a love she doesn't know about, but she trust Al—Wadūd, The Most Loving to give her qalb to someone who will never make it an option to hurt her.
And may be he exists somewhere, may be somewhere near or perhaps so far to a place she have never been, but he exists, all the time, in her imagined future with him; imperfect yet together and Allāh—loving and fearing, earning the Love of Al—Wadūd Who Wills for hearts to meet, even if the distance is heavens and the earth.
He exists. He exists in her du'ās, praying to Allāh to be his qurratu ayn, asking Him to take care of him, loving him already in her du'ās.
She exists here in her die—hard hopeless romantic self, scarred by life, and living in saudade. She exists here, waiting for him.
—Veiled Poet | She Exists
May be she exists in someone's silent point of view, looking at her in all the gentle way that that he can—by never gazing at her as she is not yet his. He's handling her so careful with du'ās to Allāh to take care of her—all without her knowledge and consciousness of his existence. He talks to her in the most gentle way he could—by never daring to utter a brave 'salām' to her privately, but mentions her name to Allāh more often than she can ever imagine.
May be there's a love that she doesn't know in the door that she thought was closed—and maybe it's purposely closed, because the key is still being carefully crafted in du'ās and self—improvement, so when he comes, she'll deserve him and he'll deserve her.
While she doesn't know where he is, she longingly waits to see his smile, yearning to hear him utter her name like a luxury that she never was able to afford, but paid them through her endless du'as and patience, until qadar finally hand her hands to his. Until he can finally call her half of his dīn.
May be there's always a love she doesn't know about, but she trust Al—Wadūd, The Most Loving to give her qalb to someone who will never make it an option to hurt her.
And may be he exists somewhere, may be somewhere near or perhaps so far to a place she have never been, but he exists, all the time, in her imagined future with him; imperfect yet together and Allāh—loving and fearing, earning the Love of Al—Wadūd Who Wills for hearts to meet, even if the distance is heavens and the earth.
He exists. He exists in her du'ās, praying to Allāh to be his qurratu ayn, asking Him to take care of him, loving him already in her du'ās.
She exists here in her die—hard hopeless romantic self, scarred by life, and living in saudade. She exists here, waiting for him.
—Veiled Poet | She Exists
❤1👍1
I'm so sick of all the people who hurt me, and then they act as if there's nothing wrong with it. I hate being very forgiving. I know that nobody is perfect, and we all make mistakes. But it is not a valid reason to hurt someone. I wish they would understand how painful it is to bear everything that they do to me, even if I pretend that I am still okay. I am so sick of everyone who makes me feel terrible about myself. They will hurt me and do everything to make me feel small, and then they will blame me for the way I reacted. Their insensitivity makes me feel like I don't even have the right to complain about the pain that I receive from them. These things are making me sick, and I even wish I could just disappear so I could never see them again.
👍2
I wish people would learn how to be kind to others. Sometimes, I wish I could control how they treat me. It's just sad that we can't force them to do good things for others. We can't control someone's actions and words. I want to be patient with others, but sometimes I can't take it anymore. I am so sick of tolerating the wrong behaviors of others. I am so sick of being treated poorly. And I am so sick of forgiving people and watching them do the things that could hurt me over and over again. I am so sick of people, and I am so sick of them for making me feel so unwanted and unlovable.
— Shiori X
— Shiori X
👍1
I thought the most heartbreaking sound is a crying of a broken heart
every sniff and sob are like thousands of darts
getting through the system that it hurts
till the last strand of being—the pain burns.
I thought the most painful tears are those which you see
flowing from the eyes forming rivers to a sea
those which come with painful sobs
echoing behind locked door knobs
but I never knew there's still one
painful crying that creates no sound
a sound of a crying heart in silence
a sound of sniffs and sobs that yearn for recompense
I never have heard of a tearless cry
but I have seen her eyes and they can never lie
her tears streams down to her wounded soul
behind her laughter I can hear—it howls
I never have heard of cry without sniffs, sobs, and deep sighs
but I saw her beyond the lines
I heard the silent crack of her heart that shattered
into millions of pieces of words she never utter
I never knew how painful it could be
when you cry without tears melancholically
tears that's caged inside the heart for it can't flee
as no more of them can shed for the heart's too tired to bleed
and may be the most painful tears to cry
are the ones that come out dry
they don't show traces of pain
except by the confession of eyes that show no fain
the most painful cry is the one you can't hear
when the soul silently howl in sheer
tears which sound is only known to The Seer,
to Allāh alone Who is Near.
Veiled Poet | tearless cry
every sniff and sob are like thousands of darts
getting through the system that it hurts
till the last strand of being—the pain burns.
I thought the most painful tears are those which you see
flowing from the eyes forming rivers to a sea
those which come with painful sobs
echoing behind locked door knobs
but I never knew there's still one
painful crying that creates no sound
a sound of a crying heart in silence
a sound of sniffs and sobs that yearn for recompense
I never have heard of a tearless cry
but I have seen her eyes and they can never lie
her tears streams down to her wounded soul
behind her laughter I can hear—it howls
I never have heard of cry without sniffs, sobs, and deep sighs
but I saw her beyond the lines
I heard the silent crack of her heart that shattered
into millions of pieces of words she never utter
I never knew how painful it could be
when you cry without tears melancholically
tears that's caged inside the heart for it can't flee
as no more of them can shed for the heart's too tired to bleed
and may be the most painful tears to cry
are the ones that come out dry
they don't show traces of pain
except by the confession of eyes that show no fain
the most painful cry is the one you can't hear
when the soul silently howl in sheer
tears which sound is only known to The Seer,
to Allāh alone Who is Near.
Veiled Poet | tearless cry
❤2
When I say I'm tired, it doesn't mean I am giving up. I just feel so exhausted in everything, that no matter how many times I force myself to get up, I still end up feeling completely wear out. I've been thinking about my life and it's a shame on me seeing myself helplessly not progressing. I can't even make myself proud.
When I say I'm tired, I want people to understand me. I want them to appreciate me eventhough I will never be enough to impress them. I want them to give me silence for awhile or simply leave me alone. I never want to quit, but at least give me a time to rest from this tiredness.
I may have failed so many times, but I am working hard to make myself better. I'm tired of proving myself to anyone. But I wish they know that before they become disppointed with me, I've already been disappointed with myself for a long time.
— Shiori X
When I say I'm tired, I want people to understand me. I want them to appreciate me eventhough I will never be enough to impress them. I want them to give me silence for awhile or simply leave me alone. I never want to quit, but at least give me a time to rest from this tiredness.
I may have failed so many times, but I am working hard to make myself better. I'm tired of proving myself to anyone. But I wish they know that before they become disppointed with me, I've already been disappointed with myself for a long time.
— Shiori X
She's tired.
She's tired of the psychological mind games and people pretending to be someone they're not.
She's tired of the shallow conversations with people that only care about themselves.
She's tired of attention from men with hidden agendas.
She's tired of being treated like an option when she should have been treated like a priority from the first conversation.
She's tired of spending countless nights questioning her own self worth.
She's tired of people not respecting her boundaries and forcing her to do things she's not ready to do.
She's at a point in her life where she wants to be loved correctly or be left alone completely.
~ Cody Bret
She's tired of the psychological mind games and people pretending to be someone they're not.
She's tired of the shallow conversations with people that only care about themselves.
She's tired of attention from men with hidden agendas.
She's tired of being treated like an option when she should have been treated like a priority from the first conversation.
She's tired of spending countless nights questioning her own self worth.
She's tired of people not respecting her boundaries and forcing her to do things she's not ready to do.
She's at a point in her life where she wants to be loved correctly or be left alone completely.
~ Cody Bret
I disappear sometimes. It's my thing. No one notices, but there are days when I choose to just shut the door of my heart, and focus on trying to get through the rain and the sad thoughts that always find their way to the surface.
There are moments when people may need me and I'm not reachable. When the phone would ring and I'll just stare at the caller ID and wait it to stop because I don't want to talk. I hope they don't mind. I'm never good with opening up to people, or with sharing the weight of my world, and I think that it's fine. We all fight battles we don't tell anyone.
Don't get me wrong, my life has a lot of happy moments. But I disappear sometimes to save myself, and I hope it's not a selfish thing to do. I just want to win my battles, too.
— JMP
There are moments when people may need me and I'm not reachable. When the phone would ring and I'll just stare at the caller ID and wait it to stop because I don't want to talk. I hope they don't mind. I'm never good with opening up to people, or with sharing the weight of my world, and I think that it's fine. We all fight battles we don't tell anyone.
Don't get me wrong, my life has a lot of happy moments. But I disappear sometimes to save myself, and I hope it's not a selfish thing to do. I just want to win my battles, too.
— JMP