Death Of An Artist

By Alexander Raju

If death's inevitable, die at the right time,
While people retain you dear to their hearts;

Don't die too young, before your talents proved
That your death a devastation to the world;

Don't die too old that you a skeleton turned,
Your body shrunk to a shrimp, and face dried;

Die when your image is quite fresh and clear
In the minds of your kith and kins so dear;

Die when others could say, ‘early a bit'
That a few drops of tears would stain their cheeks;

Do your best and leave your life incomplete,
Give yourself a chance for a life second;

Hate the longevity of Tithonus,
Be Ulysses and conquer your lifespan;

Live and die a beauty, and be content,
For singing you stopped when your voice was good.

"Do I have an original thought in my head? My bald head. Maybe if I were happier, my hair wouldn't be falling out. Life is short. I need to make the most of it.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.
hhffff, I'm a walking cliché.
I really need to go to the doctor and have my leg checked. There's something wrong. A bump. The dentist called again. I'm way overdue.
If I stop putting things off, I would be happier. All I do is sit on my fat ass.
If my ass wasn't fat I would be happier. I wouldn't have to wear these shirts with the tails out all the time. Like that's fooling anyone. Fat ass.
I should start jogging again. Five miles a day. Really do it this time. Maybe rock climbing.
I need to turn my life around. What do I need to do? I need to fall in love. I need to have a girlfriend. I need to read more, improve myself.
What if I learned Russian or something? Or took up an instrument? I could speak Chinese. I'd be the screenwriter who speaks Chinese and plays the oboe. That would be cool.
I should get my hair cut short. Stop trying to fool myself and everyone else into thinking I have a full head of hair. How pathetic is that?
Just be real. Confident. Isn't that what women are attracted to? Men don't have to be attractive. But that's not true. Especially these days. Almost as much pressure on men as there is on women these days.

Why should I be made to feel I have to apologize for my existence?
Maybe it's my brain chemistry. Maybe that's what's wrong with me. Bad chemistry. All my problems and anxiety can be reduced to a chemical imbalance or some kind of misfiring synapses. I need to get help for that. But I'll still be ugly though. Nothing's gonna change that."

- Charlie Kaufman, Adaptation (2002)

Alone

"From childhood’s hour I have not been
As others were, I have not seen
As others saw, I could not bring
My passions from a common spring
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow, I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone
And all I loved, I loved alone"

-Edgar Allan Poe

Prep for the AI apocalypse😉

You can say Feminism this Feminism that, but attacking a whole movement for a single person is wrong. Because በተሳሳተ ሆነ በተቃና Feminism in its early rise that it has in our country, we should work to shape it for good than ጉድጓድ ምሰን ለመቅበር ከምንሮጥ። I don't personally agree some paths and ideas of some of the vocal feminists on Tiktok, but it doesn't mean i should hate on the whole movement ፥ የሚጋጥፈጡትን ጭቆና ደጋፊ ሆኜ መገኘት የለብኝም.

You know why ...

I work in Somali region ያለ Hospital. And if only you saw,

* Where I work at 90% በላይ ሴቶች have Type 3 FGM i.e Infibulation የሚባለው አይነት ግርዛት ፥ ተቆርጦ ሁሉም ደግሞ የሚሰፋው

* Where I work at የተሰፉ ወጣት ሴቶች come with period pain and even puerperal infection በጣም ጠቦ ተሰፍቶ, having no exit for their menstrual flow and it accumulating for days n weeks

*Where I work at young 15/16/17 year old teenager comes with her mother at night prior to her weeding to some ብዙ ግመል የሰጠ 80 year old የተሰፋውን ለመክፈት before her wedding and also for the mother to check the child's virginity still being there by the local nurses ... mind you እንግዲህ this is in a government hospital

* Where i work at a woman on her 6th 7th pregnancy comes ምጥ ይዟት while ባሏ ትቷት ለስራ ሌላ ቦታ የሚሄድ ከሆነ ለምን አስር አትወልድም ሲሄድ አሰፍቷት ነው ... mind you a 30 35 year old mother of 6 7 kids in. labour ተሰፍታ then ተከፍቶ she gives birth n as soon as she goes home ድጋሚ ትሰፋለች። A sad never ending cycle

*Where I work at the CEO of the hospital, mind you a Doctor who learned in Addis has his female children go through FGM or else the society will ostracize them and him n she would be unmarried forever

*Where I work at complicate አድርጎ the pregnancy either the kid or the mother or both will die unless Operation is done ሲባል the mother can't decide. If her father says no, በቃ እምቢ አለ ነው ... Operate ከተደረገች ቶሎ አታረግግዝም ደግማ ብሎ .... Uterus Rupture. አርጎ a mother and the baby died on my watch because both her husband and father said no to operation

ብቻ ብዙ ብዙ

ጠርበን through being an ally of women and helping symbiotically through Feminism our women liberate ማረግ ሲገባን the educated የተባልነው እንዲህ ጭፍን መሆናችን ያሳዝናል

At last as Jay Z said
"No civilization is conquered from the outside until it destroys itself from within."

-from Facebook.

Whatever movements accomplish or don't accomplish, whoever they offend and alienate, whatever reservations , social points and cynicism want to hold us back from participating...they should not deter us.

No one bats an eye about protesting big tech with clippy profile pics but when it comes to the rape and murder of women, it suddenly becomes a ground for debate.

Neon green profiles will not abolish the problem, they certainly won't bring back these women or heal the victims families. But if an onslaught of bold, glaring neon greens make the tiniest difference in the suffering of women, we should have it on our profiles and sign the petitions.

It's vibrant, it's visible, it's revealing and it will announce your presence to the deaf. Why should that stop you?

Oh, and if people call you feminist, that's not something to recoil from. If feminism means putting a spotlight on women's suffering and doing this tiny thing to fight it, then in Adichie's words, we should all be feminists!

We've reached 24K

I'm sure there's such a thing as social media psychosis.

YouTube is like psychedelics. Enlightening until you start hearing voices.
Not in the definitive, medical sense, of course. It's like what the Queen says to Alice, "Why, sometimes I believed in six impossible things before breakfast." And if you have a certain kind of temperament, you too can believe in six impossible things before breakfast, because there's a lot of voices and lots of them make sense. Although it's commendable to entertain numerous thoughts, at some point it becomes too much for your sanity.

If your sense of reality is malleable enough, you become susceptible to psychosis. Each voice appears as flesh and blood. And if you're mistrustful of your ability to interpret theories, statistics and evidences, you'll have to rely on some kind of a qualified mentor.
Your sensei tells you which voices are real. And just like that you start doubting your eyes and ears.

If you're lucky, you become disillusioned with them.
What if they're lying? What if they're all fathered by
the same source, money. Or they're honestly deceived?
Caution slowly grows into paranoia. And that's just the voices of politics, where nuance goes to die.

Then there are the voices of everyday people imparting their wisdom about the good life. Polyphonic voices booming through the other side like the voices of the damned, warning you against wasting your 20's. Long video essays about the "Percy Jackson and the X-ification of Y".

Worldview upon worldview. An overwhelming amount of good and bad and contradicting advice. Tasteless takes. Tasteful takes. Beautiful souls that might simply be results of your imaginings.

Eventually, you lose your ability to be sure. Why is everyone so sure in front of the unknowable? You mysticize until you're convinced that you are the other and the other is you.

That's how I came to hear voices and I can't distinguish real from fake. Or mine from others.
I don't know what knowing is or what can be known beyond reasonable doubt?


Just as in the case of classic psychosis it's the invasion of the conscious by the subconscious. That's because our online persona becomes
the place where our shadows go to be realized. Social media became a place where we can send our monsters to come out and play. In the process we feed Instagram's insatiable appetite for vile comments and YouTube's policy for burying deviant comments to protect the echo chamber.


Indiscriminate integration of these alien voices is fragmentation of spirit. Say no. We need to be whole.
And to be whole is to choose who to be. To show forgiveness to oneself in a digital age that has abolished forgetfulness and won't let anyone live down their mistakes.

Decide what to be, and go be it.

-The Avett Brothers

Ok, thanks.