Pain didn’t destroy; sometimes, it created a heartless version of you.
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Almost a month has passed since my Sikkim trip, but my heart is still there. I miss those unforgettable moments with my friends, the breathtaking views of nature, and the icy roads that felt like a dream. The fresh mountain air, the peaceful silence of the hills, and the thrill of exploring new places, it all feels like yesterday. Sikkim wasn’t just a trip; it was an experience that will stay with me forever.
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No matter how much temperature rises, but can't stop me from wearing black clothes.
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It’s something I’ve unconsciously made a habit, this silent retreat whenever I’m not in the mood to talk. I’ve normalized it so much that it feels like second nature now, but deep down, I know it’s not the healthiest way to deal with my emotions.
When I’m sad or hurt, I struggle to put my feelings into words. Not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t know how. It’s as if the moment I try, my mind shuts down, and instead of explaining or expressing, I withdraw. I distance myself, not out of spite or to punish anyone, but because it feels easier, less exhausting than opening up.
So, I keep everything inside. I have conversations with myself in my head, replaying situations, analyzing emotions, and trying to make sense of it all. I feel everything so deeply, but the words never make it out. And that’s the hardest part, carrying the weight of my emotions alone, knowing that no one really understands because I never let them in.
When I’m sad or hurt, I struggle to put my feelings into words. Not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t know how. It’s as if the moment I try, my mind shuts down, and instead of explaining or expressing, I withdraw. I distance myself, not out of spite or to punish anyone, but because it feels easier, less exhausting than opening up.
So, I keep everything inside. I have conversations with myself in my head, replaying situations, analyzing emotions, and trying to make sense of it all. I feel everything so deeply, but the words never make it out. And that’s the hardest part, carrying the weight of my emotions alone, knowing that no one really understands because I never let them in.
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I have a deep attachment to my phone, more than anything else in my life. It’s not just a device; it’s my constant companion, the one thing that never leaves my side. No matter what time of day it is, no matter how I’m feeling, my phone is always there especially in those long, lonely nights when the world feels quiet, and everything around me fades into darkness.
There are moments when I find myself lost in my thoughts, struggling with emotions I don’t know how to express. During those times, when there’s no one to talk to, no one to understand, my phone becomes my escape. It holds my memories, my thoughts, my music, and my distractions. It lets me connect with people even when I feel disconnected from everything else.
While others may see it as just another object, to me, it’s more than that. It’s the silent witness to my solitude, the keeper of my late night thoughts, and the only thing that never leaves me alone in the dark.
There are moments when I find myself lost in my thoughts, struggling with emotions I don’t know how to express. During those times, when there’s no one to talk to, no one to understand, my phone becomes my escape. It holds my memories, my thoughts, my music, and my distractions. It lets me connect with people even when I feel disconnected from everything else.
While others may see it as just another object, to me, it’s more than that. It’s the silent witness to my solitude, the keeper of my late night thoughts, and the only thing that never leaves me alone in the dark.
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