Pain didn’t destroy; sometimes, it created a heartless version of you.
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Almost a month has passed since my Sikkim trip, but my heart is still there. I miss those unforgettable moments with my friends, the breathtaking views of nature, and the icy roads that felt like a dream. The fresh mountain air, the peaceful silence of the hills, and the thrill of exploring new places, it all feels like yesterday. Sikkim wasn’t just a trip; it was an experience that will stay with me forever.
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No matter how much temperature rises, but can't stop me from wearing black clothes.
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It’s something I’ve unconsciously made a habit, this silent retreat whenever I’m not in the mood to talk. I’ve normalized it so much that it feels like second nature now, but deep down, I know it’s not the healthiest way to deal with my emotions.
When I’m sad or hurt, I struggle to put my feelings into words. Not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t know how. It’s as if the moment I try, my mind shuts down, and instead of explaining or expressing, I withdraw. I distance myself, not out of spite or to punish anyone, but because it feels easier, less exhausting than opening up.
So, I keep everything inside. I have conversations with myself in my head, replaying situations, analyzing emotions, and trying to make sense of it all. I feel everything so deeply, but the words never make it out. And that’s the hardest part, carrying the weight of my emotions alone, knowing that no one really understands because I never let them in.
When I’m sad or hurt, I struggle to put my feelings into words. Not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t know how. It’s as if the moment I try, my mind shuts down, and instead of explaining or expressing, I withdraw. I distance myself, not out of spite or to punish anyone, but because it feels easier, less exhausting than opening up.
So, I keep everything inside. I have conversations with myself in my head, replaying situations, analyzing emotions, and trying to make sense of it all. I feel everything so deeply, but the words never make it out. And that’s the hardest part, carrying the weight of my emotions alone, knowing that no one really understands because I never let them in.
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