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There are not many big problems or mistakes in your writing. ideas are clear and support is mostly enough and logical. It would be better to have just two supports for each main idea in each paragraph and support them with about 40 to 50 Words. having more than that would be dangerous because you probably can not give enough support and there will be a lack of coherence and cohesion. Moreover, conclusion could be smaller and more concise.
Grammatical structures, collocations and vocabulary could be taken to the next level and more uncommon words could be used to explain whatever you had to say in your writing.
Provided that you can write the same way for more tough topics my guess is you can get a solid 6.5
Estimated Score is 6.5 🌹
There are not many big problems or mistakes in your writing. ideas are clear and support is mostly enough and logical. It would be better to have just two supports for each main idea in each paragraph and support them with about 40 to 50 Words. having more than that would be dangerous because you probably can not give enough support and there will be a lack of coherence and cohesion. Moreover, conclusion could be smaller and more concise.
Grammatical structures, collocations and vocabulary could be taken to the next level and more uncommon words could be used to explain whatever you had to say in your writing.
Provided that you can write the same way for more tough topics my guess is you can get a solid 6.5
Estimated Score is 6.5 🌹