The outward appearance could not reveal the fact that his ‘personality’ was no true self-expression but was largely a series of impersonations. The part he regarded himself as having been playing most of his schooldays was that of a rather precocious schoolboy with a sharp wit, but somewhat cold. He said, however, that when he was fifteen he had realized that this part was becoming unpopular because ‘It had a nasty tongue’. Accordingly he decided to modify this part into a more likeable character, ‘with good results’.

As an actor, he wished always to be detached from the part he was playing. Thereby he felt himself to be master of the situation, in entire conscious control of his expressions and actions, calculating with precision their effects on others. To be spontaneous was merely stupid. It was simply putting oneself at other people’s mercy.

Referring back again to David, his actions seem from the beginning of his life to have been in almost total compliance and conformity with his parents’ actual wishes and expectations, i.e. he was a perfect model child who was never a trouble.

آخر بوست والعباس:

It is not uncommon for depersonalized patients, whether or not they are schizophrenic, to speak of having murdered their selves and also of having lost or been robbed of their selves.
Such statements are usually called delusions, but if they are delusions, they are delusions which contain existential truth. They are to be understood as statements that are literally true within the terms of reference of the individual who makes them.

The schizophrenic who says he has committed suicide, may be perfectly clear about the fact that he has not cut his throat open or thrown himself into a canal, and he may expect this to be equally clear to the person whom he is addressing, otherwise that person is regarded as a fool. In fact, he makes many statements of this order, which may be expressly intended as snares for those he regards as idiots and the whole herd of the uncomprehending. For such a patient it would probably be a complete non sequitur to attempt to kill his self, by cutting his throat, since his self and his throat may be felt to bear only a tenuous and remote relationship to each other, sufficiently remote for what happens to the one to have little bearing on the other. That is, his self is virtually unembodied. The self is probably conceived as immortal or made of nearly imperishable non-bodily substance. He may call it ‘life substance’ or his ‘soul’, or even have his own name for it, and feel that he can be robbed of it.

هاهية خلصت الكتاب...

يمكن واحد من أحلى الأشياء بألف ليلة وليلة هو أُسلوبهم بالوصف. مثلًا المقدمة الشهيرة ببداية كل ليلة لما أُخت شهرزاد الصغيرة (دنيازاد) تكول: "باللهِ عليكِ يا أُختاه، حدثينا حدوتةً مِن أحاديثِك الحِسان نَقطَع بها سَهر ليلتِنا،" فتجاوبها شهرزاد: "حُبًا وكرامةً."

أو لما وحدة من الشخصيات تروي قصتها فتكول: "جَرَى لي حَديثٌ لو كُتِبَ بالإبر على آماق البصر لكانَ عِبرةً لِمَن اعتبر"

أو "... وإذا بِشابٍّ نقيِّ الأثواب، بوَجهٍ أقمَرْ وطَرفٍ أحوَر وجَبينٍ أزهَر وخدٍّ أحمر وعِذارٍ أخضَر وشامةٍ كأنّها قُرصُ عَنبر"

أو "... وبَعد ساعةٍ أقبَلَ كأنّه البَدرُ إذا أبدَر أو الصُبحُ إذا أسفَر"

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بالمناسبة، النسخة اللي داقراها هي اللي حققها محسن مهدي.
أكو نسخ ثانية مشهورة أكثر (وهي غالبًا اللي رح تلكاها بالمكتبات أو pdf) بس ذني معدّلين على لغتهن—بشكل سيء—وحاذفين هواي أشياء عود تُعتَبَر "لاأخلاقية."

"بَلَغَني أنّه كان في قديم الزمان، بإقليم مصر سُلطانٌ، صاحبُ عدلٍ وأمان، وجودٍ وإحسان، يُحبّ الفقراء ويُجالِس العلماء، شُجاعٌ مُطاع. وكانَ له وزيرٌ عاقلٌ خبير، ذو عِلمٍ وتأثير، وحِسابٍ وتحرير، وهو شيخٌ كبير، وكانَ له ولَدان كأنّهما قَمَران، أو غزالان مليحان، كاملان في الحُسنِ والجمال، والبهاء والقدِّ والاعتدال. إسمُ الكبير شمسُ الدين محمد، والصغير نور الدين علي..."

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عصفورة بغداد is my spirit animal

napoleon retreating from Moscow by Adolph Northen, 1851.

هو العُمر ايه غير ليلة؟

Edward Moran (1829_1901) Moonlit Scene