Me after the kids are asleep and wife texts me "Come here"

https://youtu.be/Ixrje2rXLMA

RIP

The soul of dolly Parton fuels the Hitler spirit for telegram subscribers.

POV: It's Penis Inspection Day

These glasses look like someone drew them on her face

https://youtu.be/U_U59u69tys

RIP

Man, celebrities are dropping like fruit flies this month

A pro-Ukrainian account just posted a picture of Tim Curry from Command and Conquer Red Alert and claimed that he was a Russian general that was KIA

"Just one more thing ma'am. We found your astrology blog and your rants about how clancy is innocent. You see my wife follows that astology stuff. Me? Im a leo apparently, wife is a a, what do you call it piscese...fish! Anways my wife shows me this blog and its fascinating. Truly. So we did some digging into the astrology blog you have.The date of those posts perfectly lines up with when the children were "murdered by your husband" as you claim. Who you said was outside in the back yard with them during the time of the murder. But we found a post from your husband claiming he hates grocery shopping with a picture of the store 3 miles away. So that means shortly after your post partum party post you went out and murdered your kids, and tried to blame it on your husband. If that isnt the most damnable case of bad motherhood, I dont know what is."

rate my EDC

That’s what I love about them “Holocaust” survivors. I get older, they stay the same age.

"Richard strocher"
"Dick stroker"

You know, David Chase will never confirm this and even actively deny this in a hostile way but this in actuality is the 90 pound mole that Ginny Sacramoni had removed from her ass.

Real. GSP are corn bred super road warriors who have a death wish.

Go outside with wife to do some chores.
Im cleaning the garage while she tends to the chickens.
Every 5 minutes: "babe can you help me with..."
Then every week she says: "we really need to clean up the garage it looks so bad."
MFW Big wife throws a monkey wrench in another gear.

You already know it

HEY EVERYONE, LOOK AT ME. I'M SO COOL. WHO WANTS TO TOUCH ME?

Jk. Daily reminder to actively figure out HOW to get a bunch of something for free or cheap.

A user wrote to me:

"Good evening yall. idk where to post this rant so its going here. I am borderline crashing out tonight. My town has a total of two flock cameras, and do you wanna know where they are? Thats right, they are pointing in and out of the towns trailer park. The feds are punishing some already disadvantaged people just to make their situations worse. I tend to avoid politics whenever possible but this has made me genuinely upset.

anyways, completely unrelated question: If I wanted to cut some 3 inch aluminum pipe for a scrapping project, what would be faster? A cordless angle grinder with a skinny disk or a cordless reciprocating saw with a fresh diablo blade? Man, I really love you Uncle Scoot. I'm so thankful we're friends. Thanks in advance!"


Should he just drunk-drive into it with his ACTY?