I couldn't get in to see a doctor,
So I went to the airport, mentioned Al Queda, and got a free x-ray, breast exam and colonoscopy.
@deepthoughts2
So I went to the airport, mentioned Al Queda, and got a free x-ray, breast exam and colonoscopy.
@deepthoughts2
Having a toddler in their βwhyβ phase makes you realize how much you know and donβt know about things.
@deepthoughts2
@deepthoughts2
As a child, α°α¨α΅ α°α¨α΅s taught me Stepmoms are the worst. Then as an adult, porn taught me Stepmoms are the best. Now I am all confused.
@deepthoughts2
@deepthoughts2
I broke up with my girlfriend because she screamed too much during sex
Sometimes I could hear it two blocks away
@deepthoughts2
Sometimes I could hear it two blocks away
@deepthoughts2
That feeling when your phone rings and it was with your mom with a contact name "babe" and she gives you the phone saying "α€α€ αα΅α«α΅ αα°αα½ α°ααα½" ... God is good!
@deepthoughts2
@deepthoughts2
β€1