*When visiting someone sick
Americans: Get well soon
British: Wishing you speedy recovery
Ethiopian: I know someone who died with that same illness
Americans: Get well soon
British: Wishing you speedy recovery
Ethiopian: I know someone who died with that same illness
Foreign accent syndrome is a medical condition in which patients develop speech patterns that are perceived as a foreign accent that is different from their native accent.
Smoke weed on top of that and you will get ααα΅
Smoke weed on top of that and you will get ααα΅
The way some of you jump to conclusions will qualify you to the Olympic pole-vault game
When you fall in love with the words, it doesnβt mean you know the writer
If your mere existence put a little smile on people, you worth living!
Why women live a better, longer & a peaceful life?
Because, women don't have a wife
Because, women don't have a wife
β€1π1
My dream job is being unemployed and getting paid in six figures
*approaches woman in club*
Me: Would you like to dance?
Her: Sure.
Me: While you're dancing can I sit in your chair? I'm really tired
Me: Would you like to dance?
Her: Sure.
Me: While you're dancing can I sit in your chair? I'm really tired
*Students this days
Teacher: You have one orange, there are four people who want share your orange, what percentage of the orange would you get?
Students: 100%
Teacher: You have one orange, there are four people who want share your orange, what percentage of the orange would you get?
Students: 100%
Her: I like men who have pets
Me: [trying to impress her] Does α αα₯ count?
Me: [trying to impress her] Does α αα₯ count?
The difference between a bitch and a girl is, a bitch wonβt get offended reading this
Truth or Dare in middle school is more like βwho do you likeβ or βdo awkward sexual taskβ.
π€―1
*Presenting in class*
My Brain: Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Me: *thanks for getting this βGOLDENβ opportunity...
My Brain: Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Me: *thanks for getting this βGOLDENβ opportunity...
Ohhh Yes! Arki new... Esssay! ... ooh Hiwot....Eden genet....Fikerrrr....Cool...!!
Am talking about our bottled water, nothing sexual
Am talking about our bottled water, nothing sexual
2 reasons I don't give money to homeless people:
1. They would spend it on alcohol.
2. I want to spend it on alcohol.
π
1. They would spend it on alcohol.
2. I want to spend it on alcohol.
π
π3
If you work for yourself, you are a permanent employee of your self that you will never get fired.
But
.
.
.
.
.
You gonna starve, broken down, humiliated, and sometimes you might even become hopeless!
But it worth it! It worth every bits of sweat, disappointment and rejection!
It worth it! Trust me it worth it!
But
.
.
.
.
.
You gonna starve, broken down, humiliated, and sometimes you might even become hopeless!
But it worth it! It worth every bits of sweat, disappointment and rejection!
It worth it! Trust me it worth it!
π1
Forwarded from Deep Thoughts (Born Fighterπ―)
If your mere existence put a little smile on people, you worth living!
Isaac Newton died a virgin, there is still hope for you
β€1
text: i canβt
email: i cannot
ααα¨α α« α½αα : i am unable to can
email: i cannot
ααα¨α α« α½αα : i am unable to can