Fear of public speaking and how to deal with it
Shaking hands, confused speech, dry throat - familiar sensations?
Today we're about to mention some simple and effective tricks to help you feel more confident and perform great in publicππ»
π» Write out a detailed speech plan for yourself, so you stick to structure and save time on the speech itself.
π»Remember 2 simple numbers - 80 and 20. Women look more feminine if they use more facial expressions than gestures in their non-verbal communication. Men, on the contrary, should have more gestures. Observing this simple proportion, you will appear more harmonious and confident, and the audience will like you more.
π» To speak confidently and beautifully - learn how to breathe correctly. There is a special technique of breathing "diaphragm", it allows you to make your voice more voluminous and less tired during long speeches.
The main advice is to adopt the experience of the best speakers.
Shaking hands, confused speech, dry throat - familiar sensations?
Today we're about to mention some simple and effective tricks to help you feel more confident and perform great in publicππ»
π» Write out a detailed speech plan for yourself, so you stick to structure and save time on the speech itself.
π»Remember 2 simple numbers - 80 and 20. Women look more feminine if they use more facial expressions than gestures in their non-verbal communication. Men, on the contrary, should have more gestures. Observing this simple proportion, you will appear more harmonious and confident, and the audience will like you more.
π» To speak confidently and beautifully - learn how to breathe correctly. There is a special technique of breathing "diaphragm", it allows you to make your voice more voluminous and less tired during long speeches.
The main advice is to adopt the experience of the best speakers.
Life is teaching you to combine extremes
βοΈ love people, but be indifferent
βοΈ do good and wait for evil
βοΈ hope for the best, but expect the worst
βοΈ believe in people and trust no one
βοΈ be optimistic with a realistic outlook
βοΈ live with an open heart and let no one in
βοΈ part of you should love the world and admire it, while the other part should wait to strike and be ready for war
βοΈ love people, but be indifferent
βοΈ do good and wait for evil
βοΈ hope for the best, but expect the worst
βοΈ believe in people and trust no one
βοΈ be optimistic with a realistic outlook
βοΈ live with an open heart and let no one in
βοΈ part of you should love the world and admire it, while the other part should wait to strike and be ready for war
Affirmations for personal growth
β«οΈ I succeed in everything I do.
β«οΈ I am immensely grateful for the life I have.
β«οΈ I love myself inside and out.
β«οΈ I love myself, no matter what others think.
β«οΈ I am the only one who can define my self-worth, and I am worthy of my dreams.
β«οΈ I free myself from negative thoughts, especially negative thoughts about myself.
β«οΈ I am healthy and full of energy.
β«οΈ I accept myself as I am.
β«οΈ I succeed in everything I do.
β«οΈ I am immensely grateful for the life I have.
β«οΈ I love myself inside and out.
β«οΈ I love myself, no matter what others think.
β«οΈ I am the only one who can define my self-worth, and I am worthy of my dreams.
β«οΈ I free myself from negative thoughts, especially negative thoughts about myself.
β«οΈ I am healthy and full of energy.
β«οΈ I accept myself as I am.
Read paper books
Well, I agree, a house full of books is a dust collector.
But numerous studies show that information from paper sources is remembered and analyzed much better than electronic or audiobooks.
Why?
The feature of our brain is that the information is better remembered, which is accepted by all the senses. We hold a book in our hands, flip through its pages, smell it, feel the roughness of the paper, look at the cover and illustrations, well, except for what we read.
Well, I agree, a house full of books is a dust collector.
But numerous studies show that information from paper sources is remembered and analyzed much better than electronic or audiobooks.
Why?
The feature of our brain is that the information is better remembered, which is accepted by all the senses. We hold a book in our hands, flip through its pages, smell it, feel the roughness of the paper, look at the cover and illustrations, well, except for what we read.
Where to get energy?
β
Neither me, nor anyone else, has a single answer to this question. For each one of us, it is a different source.
How to find your source of energy?
Recognize the slightest glimmer of lively interest in whatever it is. When something makes your eyes light up. It's that real interest that connects everyone to their living creative part.
The habit of gathering these little lights will open up access to inner resources.
β
Neither me, nor anyone else, has a single answer to this question. For each one of us, it is a different source.
How to find your source of energy?
Recognize the slightest glimmer of lively interest in whatever it is. When something makes your eyes light up. It's that real interest that connects everyone to their living creative part.
The habit of gathering these little lights will open up access to inner resources.
Prisoners of stereotypes
Making the decision to become the best version of himself, be prepared to face the condemnation of society, loved ones, partners.
The main mistake is a comparison with others, the desire not to stand out from the crowd, the fear of becoming strange. But the process of personal development and self-development does not assume a ready-made patterns by which you can achieve what you want.
You have to fight the imposed stereotypes, complexes and fear.
Making the decision to become the best version of himself, be prepared to face the condemnation of society, loved ones, partners.
The main mistake is a comparison with others, the desire not to stand out from the crowd, the fear of becoming strange. But the process of personal development and self-development does not assume a ready-made patterns by which you can achieve what you want.
You have to fight the imposed stereotypes, complexes and fear.
Boost your confidence
Feel calm and unwavering, as a true king of the situation is supposed to be. And to do this, raise your testosterone level, because the higher a man's testosterone level, the more calm and emotionally stable, determined, sexy, etc.
What you need for this:
- engage in forceful confrontations - personal victories, even in ordinary contests will add self-value and will not only boost your testosterone, but also your mood
- start eating oatmeal, it neutralizes the globulin that blocks the natural production of testosterone
- this also includes foods rich in zinc and magnesium, healthy fats
- cut down on beer and alcohol, as they lower testosterone production by 50%.
Feel calm and unwavering, as a true king of the situation is supposed to be. And to do this, raise your testosterone level, because the higher a man's testosterone level, the more calm and emotionally stable, determined, sexy, etc.
What you need for this:
- engage in forceful confrontations - personal victories, even in ordinary contests will add self-value and will not only boost your testosterone, but also your mood
- start eating oatmeal, it neutralizes the globulin that blocks the natural production of testosterone
- this also includes foods rich in zinc and magnesium, healthy fats
- cut down on beer and alcohol, as they lower testosterone production by 50%.
Solve any problem
Cease to be cowardly about every problem and don't let yourself be taken out by what you think are impossible tasks. Show your backbone with this technique:
β Break the problem into pieces and solve them gradually.
Break it down until you have an algorithm of simple tasks that won't cause you difficulty, and then act.
It's better to act slowly and confidently than to tremble before each action like a little girlπ
Cease to be cowardly about every problem and don't let yourself be taken out by what you think are impossible tasks. Show your backbone with this technique:
β Break the problem into pieces and solve them gradually.
Break it down until you have an algorithm of simple tasks that won't cause you difficulty, and then act.
It's better to act slowly and confidently than to tremble before each action like a little girlπ
Shut up any asshole
Calm is the difference between you and emotional girls. Don't turn into a barmaid and always respond with dignity.
Hold up any aggressor with just one tactic:
- Put your opponent in a position where he will only answer your questions with a strict "yes" or "no."
And twist those questions in your direction as much as possible. That way you'll easily lead him into a stalemate and, in fact, he'll shut himself up.
As an example, if you have to perform some duties, without stinting on expressions, ask if they are in the list of your job duties. In addition, ask if you are paid extra for them.
Calm is the difference between you and emotional girls. Don't turn into a barmaid and always respond with dignity.
Hold up any aggressor with just one tactic:
- Put your opponent in a position where he will only answer your questions with a strict "yes" or "no."
And twist those questions in your direction as much as possible. That way you'll easily lead him into a stalemate and, in fact, he'll shut himself up.
As an example, if you have to perform some duties, without stinting on expressions, ask if they are in the list of your job duties. In addition, ask if you are paid extra for them.
Information garbage
Television, the Internet, pseudo-specialists are not always relevant, reliable sources of information. The psychology of personal development is a science that must be learned with care:
Learn to find authoritative sources.
Rely on research, not misguided opinions.
Don't trust experts who are ready to solve all problems at once, lightning fast.
To avoid mistakes, read books, scholarly articles, and authoritative publications where psychologists argue a position.
Television, the Internet, pseudo-specialists are not always relevant, reliable sources of information. The psychology of personal development is a science that must be learned with care:
Learn to find authoritative sources.
Rely on research, not misguided opinions.
Don't trust experts who are ready to solve all problems at once, lightning fast.
To avoid mistakes, read books, scholarly articles, and authoritative publications where psychologists argue a position.
Fear of defeat
Condemnation in society, by loved ones, frightens a person, often forces him to give up radical changes.
But creative self-development, financial growth, external and internal transformations are impossible without mistakes, defeats. This is a normal process of movement, and a loss, a failed attempt - life experience, not a lost war.
How to get rid of fear: never blame yourself for mistakes, but learn to accept them, analyze, correct them.
Condemnation in society, by loved ones, frightens a person, often forces him to give up radical changes.
But creative self-development, financial growth, external and internal transformations are impossible without mistakes, defeats. This is a normal process of movement, and a loss, a failed attempt - life experience, not a lost war.
How to get rid of fear: never blame yourself for mistakes, but learn to accept them, analyze, correct them.
How to avoid emotional burnout?
Oh, I know that many people don't like to plan. And in vain.
β«οΈ You should plan your rest
Allocate time in your daily plan for reading, watching useful video content, talking to friends, taking walks, and so on. Follow the plan strictly and respect your personal time just as much as your work time.
β«οΈ Even your favorite coffee should be limited
Drinking too much coffee can lead to caffeine addiction, which is detrimental on a physiological and psycho-emotional level.
β«οΈTry new things
Make it a rule to try something new every month: sign up for a trial dance lesson, visit a trampoline center, go to a master class. So you'll get a boost of energy from new experiences, meet new people.
Oh, I know that many people don't like to plan. And in vain.
β«οΈ You should plan your rest
Allocate time in your daily plan for reading, watching useful video content, talking to friends, taking walks, and so on. Follow the plan strictly and respect your personal time just as much as your work time.
β«οΈ Even your favorite coffee should be limited
Drinking too much coffee can lead to caffeine addiction, which is detrimental on a physiological and psycho-emotional level.
β«οΈTry new things
Make it a rule to try something new every month: sign up for a trial dance lesson, visit a trampoline center, go to a master class. So you'll get a boost of energy from new experiences, meet new people.
What can keep you from self-development?
I mean, does something like that happen to you?
Like courses, trainings, smart books, and routines. And everything somehow remains at a standstill.
What's getting in the way?
β«οΈ Lack of motivation
Motivation drives a person to action and makes him move toward his goal. It is like the fuel in the gas tank of a car.
β«οΈ Debris in the head
Wrong attitudes, bad habits, other people's way of thinking, fear of evaluation, labels of the past... All this is garbage in one's head, which makes one not live one's life.
β«οΈ Fear of change
There are many kinds of fears. These include the fear of taking on extra responsibility, facing criticism, and failing.
I mean, does something like that happen to you?
Like courses, trainings, smart books, and routines. And everything somehow remains at a standstill.
What's getting in the way?
β«οΈ Lack of motivation
Motivation drives a person to action and makes him move toward his goal. It is like the fuel in the gas tank of a car.
β«οΈ Debris in the head
Wrong attitudes, bad habits, other people's way of thinking, fear of evaluation, labels of the past... All this is garbage in one's head, which makes one not live one's life.
β«οΈ Fear of change
There are many kinds of fears. These include the fear of taking on extra responsibility, facing criticism, and failing.
We trust not in what we see
We behold and own what we invest (consciously or not) our most precious resources in: time, attention, experience, and action.
If your actions are not yielding the results you plan, you are most likely standing in a childish position:
β«οΈ "It's not my fault" (that's the way the circumstances are),
β«οΈ "It didn't work out for me again and there's no point in trying anything else,
β«οΈ "I have no idea what I need to do, so I'm going to keep doing something... just for the sake of action and pretend I'm not concerned with the result."
β«οΈ "I'm waiting for someone to come along and help/suggest/guide, hold my hand."
See?
More often than not, the reason for stagnation is that we don't want to go beyond the childish position.
We behold and own what we invest (consciously or not) our most precious resources in: time, attention, experience, and action.
If your actions are not yielding the results you plan, you are most likely standing in a childish position:
β«οΈ "It's not my fault" (that's the way the circumstances are),
β«οΈ "It didn't work out for me again and there's no point in trying anything else,
β«οΈ "I have no idea what I need to do, so I'm going to keep doing something... just for the sake of action and pretend I'm not concerned with the result."
β«οΈ "I'm waiting for someone to come along and help/suggest/guide, hold my hand."
See?
More often than not, the reason for stagnation is that we don't want to go beyond the childish position.
The Halo Effect
I still fall for this trick.
If you like a person's appearance, there is a good chance that you also like what they say or do, including things that may not exist, this phenomenon is called the halo effect.
The halo effect is a distortion that plays a serious role in how we perceive people and situations, simplifying them and making them more logical than they really are.
Sometimes it really pays to make a good first impression in an important meeting, as the outcome may depend on it.
But beware, as there are professionals who have mastered this tool to perfection.
I still fall for this trick.
If you like a person's appearance, there is a good chance that you also like what they say or do, including things that may not exist, this phenomenon is called the halo effect.
The halo effect is a distortion that plays a serious role in how we perceive people and situations, simplifying them and making them more logical than they really are.
Sometimes it really pays to make a good first impression in an important meeting, as the outcome may depend on it.
But beware, as there are professionals who have mastered this tool to perfection.
Finding a vector of development
In order to find out where to go, analyze the factors that prevent you from living a happy, fulfilling life:
-Health problems.
-Relationships. Short-lived, you are depressed, fall into victim status.
-Satisfaction at work.
-Lack of career.
-Financial instability.
-No spiritual, intellectual growth, development.
-Inability to build social connections, to communicate with others.
The goal of the stage is to understand which sphere of life suffers the most, to start self-improvement in this direction.
In order to find out where to go, analyze the factors that prevent you from living a happy, fulfilling life:
-Health problems.
-Relationships. Short-lived, you are depressed, fall into victim status.
-Satisfaction at work.
-Lack of career.
-Financial instability.
-No spiritual, intellectual growth, development.
-Inability to build social connections, to communicate with others.
The goal of the stage is to understand which sphere of life suffers the most, to start self-improvement in this direction.
Helplessness - where from and why?
When a man beats a woman, many people condemn her. Like, how can you not leave, how can you put up with this crap. But in fact, she often CANNOT and her "infantilism" has a scientific explanation, which is called "learned helplessness"ππ»
If a child is beaten by parents since childhood, put under moral pressure (humiliated, oppressively brought up), he got used to the fact that he has to tolerate, there's nowhere to go. And when in the future such a person found himself in similar conditions, he acted according to the familiar scenario "endure and suffer".
When a man beats a woman, many people condemn her. Like, how can you not leave, how can you put up with this crap. But in fact, she often CANNOT and her "infantilism" has a scientific explanation, which is called "learned helplessness"ππ»
If a child is beaten by parents since childhood, put under moral pressure (humiliated, oppressively brought up), he got used to the fact that he has to tolerate, there's nowhere to go. And when in the future such a person found himself in similar conditions, he acted according to the familiar scenario "endure and suffer".
Fear of relationships - where from and how to get rid of
Tough boundaries are about trying to defend yourself where no one ever thought of encroaching on you, about fencing yourself off from close relationships and trying to put up a higher fence to make sure no one gets over...
How to overcome the fear of relationshipsβ
The first thing to do is to admit your fear, to say out loud what you are afraid of. Then stand in front of a mirror and say out loud a supportive phrase about yourself.
For example: "My fear is just a shadow of a past relationship. I realize that men are different and I desire to allow myself a new relationship, and it will be better than before."
The most important thing is to acknowledge your fear. Support yourself and let the anxiety fade away.
Tough boundaries are about trying to defend yourself where no one ever thought of encroaching on you, about fencing yourself off from close relationships and trying to put up a higher fence to make sure no one gets over...
How to overcome the fear of relationshipsβ
The first thing to do is to admit your fear, to say out loud what you are afraid of. Then stand in front of a mirror and say out loud a supportive phrase about yourself.
For example: "My fear is just a shadow of a past relationship. I realize that men are different and I desire to allow myself a new relationship, and it will be better than before."
The most important thing is to acknowledge your fear. Support yourself and let the anxiety fade away.
The Triple Rule - Warm Quiet Dark
β
A rule that gives us a sense of security. Hear the real you. Feel your body - what it is crying out for.
β
Real self-care is a care filled with GRACE to your body. Your thoughts. Your feelings. Self-care is it without all these conditions.
β
βοΈ If I feel like resting, I rest.
βοΈ If I wish to eat, I eat.
βοΈ If I want to sleep, I sleep.
βοΈ If I don't need to socialize with toxic people, I don't socialize.
β
I hear my body and my desires. I hear my thoughts.
β
A rule that gives us a sense of security. Hear the real you. Feel your body - what it is crying out for.
β
Real self-care is a care filled with GRACE to your body. Your thoughts. Your feelings. Self-care is it without all these conditions.
β
βοΈ If I feel like resting, I rest.
βοΈ If I wish to eat, I eat.
βοΈ If I want to sleep, I sleep.
βοΈ If I don't need to socialize with toxic people, I don't socialize.
β
I hear my body and my desires. I hear my thoughts.