Wasn’t that a bit too harsh?
是不是有点太苛刻了？
No one made fun of me because they knew that I had been busy with a lot of things in addition to getting seriously hurt.
没有人取笑我，因为他们知道我除了受重伤之外，还忙于很多事情。
No… 不。。。
Still, getting last place was a bit…
不过，获得最后一名还是有点......
I knew that all of them were thinking something similar judging by their expressions.
我知道，从他们的表情来看，他们都在想类似的事情。
But so what? 但那又怎样？
I believed that getting achievement points was more important. Anyway, an achievement was an achievement.
我认为获得成就点更重要。无论如何，成就就是成就。
* * *
是不是有点太苛刻了？
No one made fun of me because they knew that I had been busy with a lot of things in addition to getting seriously hurt.
没有人取笑我，因为他们知道我除了受重伤之外，还忙于很多事情。
No… 不。。。
Still, getting last place was a bit…
不过，获得最后一名还是有点......
I knew that all of them were thinking something similar judging by their expressions.
我知道，从他们的表情来看，他们都在想类似的事情。
But so what? 但那又怎样？
I believed that getting achievement points was more important. Anyway, an achievement was an achievement.
我认为获得成就点更重要。无论如何，成就就是成就。
* * *
Every time I went through those things, I felt how uncreative I had been.
每次我经历这些事情时，我都觉得自己是多么缺乏创造力。
* * *
每次我经历这些事情时，我都觉得自己是多么缺乏创造力。
* * *
Suddenly, both I and Ellen were rolling that snowball.
突然间，我和艾伦都在滚雪球。
If someone saw me like that, it would seriously damage Reinhardt’s dignity.
如果有人这样看我，那会严重损害莱因哈特的尊严。
However, I thought that if I started to pay attention to such banal things, that would mean that things had already gone awry, so I just focused on making the snowball even more.
但是，我认为如果我开始关注这些平庸的事情，那就意味着事情已经出了问题，所以我只是专注于让雪球变得更像。
突然间，我和艾伦都在滚雪球。
If someone saw me like that, it would seriously damage Reinhardt’s dignity.
如果有人这样看我，那会严重损害莱因哈特的尊严。
However, I thought that if I started to pay attention to such banal things, that would mean that things had already gone awry, so I just focused on making the snowball even more.
但是，我认为如果我开始关注这些平庸的事情，那就意味着事情已经出了问题，所以我只是专注于让雪球变得更像。
“You don't idolize me, you don't worship me, you don't force me or want me to act a certain way. You just take me for who I am."
“你不崇拜我，你不崇拜我，你不强迫我或希望我以某种方式行事。你只是把我当成我。
“你不崇拜我，你不崇拜我，你不强迫我或希望我以某种方式行事。你只是把我当成我。
It didn’t give me any power, but that was just the nature of belief, wasn’t it?
“I know I can’t, but I’m going to do it, believing I have to, because Reinhardt said I have to believe it.”
“我知道我做不到，但我会去做，相信我必须这样做，因为莱因哈特说我必须相信它。
“I’m not going to hide behind the excuse that I’m trying harder now, because that’s only going to make it worse.”
“我不会躲在我现在更努力的借口后面，因为这只会让情况变得更糟。
“我知道我做不到，但我会去做，相信我必须这样做，因为莱因哈特说我必须相信它。
“I’m not going to hide behind the excuse that I’m trying harder now, because that’s only going to make it worse.”
“我不会躲在我现在更努力的借口后面，因为这只会让情况变得更糟。
他不再用“我要努力”这句话来安慰自己。
‘Not to work hard, but to do better.’
“不是为了努力工作，而是为了做得更好。”
‘Not to do my best, but to win.’
“不是为了尽力而为，而是为了赢球。”
“So.” “所以。”
Scratching his head at every loss, telling himself that it’ll work out better later.
每一次失利都会挠头，告诉自己以后会好起来的。
He was done with that. 他就完蛋了。
Willpower does not equal power. 意志力不等于力量
‘Not to work hard, but to do better.’
“不是为了努力工作，而是为了做得更好。”
‘Not to do my best, but to win.’
“不是为了尽力而为，而是为了赢球。”
“So.” “所以。”
Scratching his head at every loss, telling himself that it’ll work out better later.
每一次失利都会挠头，告诉自己以后会好起来的。
He was done with that. 他就完蛋了。
Willpower does not equal power. 意志力不等于力量
“It’s not about believing, it’s about thinking that it naturally happens.”
“这不是关于相信，而是关于认为它自然发生。
“这不是关于相信，而是关于认为它自然发生。
“What can I expect to see?”
“我能期待看到什么？”
“No matter what you expect…” “不管你期待什么......”
Harriet chuckled.
“I will show you more than that.”
“我会给你看更多。”
“我能期待看到什么？”
“No matter what you expect…” “不管你期待什么......”
Harriet chuckled.
“I will show you more than that.”
“我会给你看更多。”
They always spoke in roundabout ways, fearing that something would break if they would express themselves clearly. Therefore, Reinhardt and Ellen’s relationship was a strange one, it was both something and nothing at the same time.
他们总是
他们总是
Luruien said that and shook her head.
璐瑞恩说着摇了摇头。
"But if I find them all, I'll surely go mad."
“但如果我把它们都找到，我肯定会发疯的。”
She wanted to regain her memories, but she didn't have the confidence to bear them.
她想找回记忆，但她没有信心去承受它们。
"That's right. I don't particularly have a wish, but I don't want to face death. I'm just postponing it like this. I live with only very important memories left, including the fact that I'm a Vampire Lord and that I lead the Thursday Clan."
“没错。我没有特别的愿望，但我不想面对死亡。我只是这样推迟。我活着的时候只剩下非常重要的记忆，包括我是吸血鬼领主，我领导着星期四氏族。
Excluding memories of magic, power, and knowledge, she had erased all useless memories and continued to accumulate time.
除了魔法、力量和知识的记忆之外，她已经抹去了所有无用的记忆，继续积累时间。
"Living... on."
As if compressing himself. Luruien seemed to ponder her last words, then tilted her head. Perhaps she thought the word "living" didn't suit the undead.
仿佛在压缩自己。露瑞恩似乎在思考她的遗言，然后歪了歪头。也许她认为“活着”这个词不适合亡灵。
"Rather, it seems more accurate to say that I'm slowly dying."
“相反，说我正在慢慢死去似乎更准确。
Postponing death indefinitely into the future and slowly dying.
将死亡无限期地推迟到未来，然后慢慢死去。
When they can no longer bear the immortal time, they choose death.
当他们再也无法忍受不朽的时间时，他们选择了死亡。
So, Luruien said, it's not living, but slowly dying.
所以，鲁瑞恩说，这不是活着，而是慢慢死去。
It seemed the same as living, but what's the difference?
这似乎和活着一样，但有什么区别呢？
Living and slowly dying. 活着，慢慢死去。
The results were the same, but the nuances were painfully different.
结果是一样的，但细微差别却大不相同。
"After all your plans are finished and you truly rebuild Darkland, what do you plan to do?"
“在你所有的计划都完成，你真正重建了黑暗之地之后，你打算怎么做？”
Luruien asked me that. 陆瑞恩这么问我。
A profound emptiness emanated from this ancient being. She was living, but the awareness of living a meaningless life without reason could be felt.
一股深深的空虚从这个古老的存在身上散发出来。她活着，但可以感觉到无缘无故地过着毫无意义的生活的意识。
If I become the Demon King, then what comes next, and next, and after that?
如果我成为魔王，那么接下来、接下来和之后会发生什么？
Is that what you're asking? 这就是你要问的吗？
Unfortunately, I have no intention of truly becoming the Demon King. Thus, such a question is meaningless.
不幸的是，我无意真正成为魔王。因此，这样的问题毫无意义。
I've never thought about it. 我从来没有想过。
"I'll do something." “我去做点什么。”
"...?"
"That's right. I'll do something. I won't do nothing at all."
“没错。我会做点什么。我不会什么都不做。
Even if it came to that, I wouldn't do nothing, so that's all I could say.
就算到了那个地步，我也不会什么都不做，所以我能说的就这些了。
At my words, Luruien burst into laughter.
听到我的话，露瑞恩大笑起来。
"Ha ha... Ha ha! I see. Yes. Something... I'll do something."
“哈哈......哈哈！明白了。是的。东西。。。我会做点什么的。
I didn't know what was so funny about my words, but Luruien's ears perked up as she laughed.
我不知道我的话有什么好笑的，但露瑞恩笑了起来。
"That's good. Perhaps it's better to think that way."
“那很好。也许这样想会更好。
I couldn't tell what kind of resonance my casual response had with Luruien.
我说不出我随口的回答对露瑞恩产生了什么样的共鸣。
However, Luruien said that it had been a long time since she laughed like that, and then she disappeared down the hallway in silence.
然而，露瑞恩说，她已经很久没有这样笑了，然后她默默地消失在走廊上。
Emptiness is not for those who have given up on thinking.
空虚不适合那些放弃思考的人。
It is because one thinks too deeply and then thinks again that they fall into emptiness.
正是因为一个人想得太深，然后又想，他们才会陷入空虚。
Having realized that, Luruien's footsteps seemed quite light.
意识到这一点后，露瑞恩的脚步声显得相当轻盈。
璐瑞恩说着摇了摇头。
"But if I find them all, I'll surely go mad."
“但如果我把它们都找到，我肯定会发疯的。”
She wanted to regain her memories, but she didn't have the confidence to bear them.
她想找回记忆，但她没有信心去承受它们。
"That's right. I don't particularly have a wish, but I don't want to face death. I'm just postponing it like this. I live with only very important memories left, including the fact that I'm a Vampire Lord and that I lead the Thursday Clan."
“没错。我没有特别的愿望，但我不想面对死亡。我只是这样推迟。我活着的时候只剩下非常重要的记忆，包括我是吸血鬼领主，我领导着星期四氏族。
Excluding memories of magic, power, and knowledge, she had erased all useless memories and continued to accumulate time.
除了魔法、力量和知识的记忆之外，她已经抹去了所有无用的记忆，继续积累时间。
"Living... on."
As if compressing himself. Luruien seemed to ponder her last words, then tilted her head. Perhaps she thought the word "living" didn't suit the undead.
仿佛在压缩自己。露瑞恩似乎在思考她的遗言，然后歪了歪头。也许她认为“活着”这个词不适合亡灵。
"Rather, it seems more accurate to say that I'm slowly dying."
“相反，说我正在慢慢死去似乎更准确。
Postponing death indefinitely into the future and slowly dying.
将死亡无限期地推迟到未来，然后慢慢死去。
When they can no longer bear the immortal time, they choose death.
当他们再也无法忍受不朽的时间时，他们选择了死亡。
So, Luruien said, it's not living, but slowly dying.
所以，鲁瑞恩说，这不是活着，而是慢慢死去。
It seemed the same as living, but what's the difference?
这似乎和活着一样，但有什么区别呢？
Living and slowly dying. 活着，慢慢死去。
The results were the same, but the nuances were painfully different.
结果是一样的，但细微差别却大不相同。
"After all your plans are finished and you truly rebuild Darkland, what do you plan to do?"
“在你所有的计划都完成，你真正重建了黑暗之地之后，你打算怎么做？”
Luruien asked me that. 陆瑞恩这么问我。
A profound emptiness emanated from this ancient being. She was living, but the awareness of living a meaningless life without reason could be felt.
一股深深的空虚从这个古老的存在身上散发出来。她活着，但可以感觉到无缘无故地过着毫无意义的生活的意识。
If I become the Demon King, then what comes next, and next, and after that?
如果我成为魔王，那么接下来、接下来和之后会发生什么？
Is that what you're asking? 这就是你要问的吗？
Unfortunately, I have no intention of truly becoming the Demon King. Thus, such a question is meaningless.
不幸的是，我无意真正成为魔王。因此，这样的问题毫无意义。
I've never thought about it. 我从来没有想过。
"I'll do something." “我去做点什么。”
"...?"
"That's right. I'll do something. I won't do nothing at all."
“没错。我会做点什么。我不会什么都不做。
Even if it came to that, I wouldn't do nothing, so that's all I could say.
就算到了那个地步，我也不会什么都不做，所以我能说的就这些了。
At my words, Luruien burst into laughter.
听到我的话，露瑞恩大笑起来。
"Ha ha... Ha ha! I see. Yes. Something... I'll do something."
“哈哈......哈哈！明白了。是的。东西。。。我会做点什么的。
I didn't know what was so funny about my words, but Luruien's ears perked up as she laughed.
我不知道我的话有什么好笑的，但露瑞恩笑了起来。
"That's good. Perhaps it's better to think that way."
“那很好。也许这样想会更好。
I couldn't tell what kind of resonance my casual response had with Luruien.
我说不出我随口的回答对露瑞恩产生了什么样的共鸣。
However, Luruien said that it had been a long time since she laughed like that, and then she disappeared down the hallway in silence.
然而，露瑞恩说，她已经很久没有这样笑了，然后她默默地消失在走廊上。
Emptiness is not for those who have given up on thinking.
空虚不适合那些放弃思考的人。
It is because one thinks too deeply and then thinks again that they fall into emptiness.
正是因为一个人想得太深，然后又想，他们才会陷入空虚。
Having realized that, Luruien's footsteps seemed quite light.
意识到这一点后，露瑞恩的脚步声显得相当轻盈。
Would it be better if the Gate incident occurred...? Now, it might be better not to know.
如果门事件发生会更好吗......？现在，最好不要知道。
In the end, I hadn't yet touched the essence of the Gate incident.
最后，我还没有触及门事件的本质。
That's why I knew that all these thoughts and worries were ultimately empty.
如果门事件发生会更好吗......？现在，最好不要知道。
In the end, I hadn't yet touched the essence of the Gate incident.
最后，我还没有触及门事件的本质。
That's why I knew that all these thoughts and worries were ultimately empty.