Asexuality and Aromanticism on Reddit
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Mirror of /r/asexuality, /r/asexual, /r/aaaaaaacccccccce and /r/aromanticism.

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Def confirmed I’m Ace

I’m really drunk so sorry if this is incoherent. For a long time I have identified as ace but always had this voice in the back of my head telling me that I just hadn’t found the right person. WELL my friends just started having a threesome in-front of me and I’m DEFINITELY not attracted lmao. Sitting in the living room now just letting them have their fun haha.

https://redd.it/1n9ttrl
@asexualityonreddit
Scared I won’t find a partner

I’m 27F, I don’t feel in a rush to start a relationship with someone, but I do worry about the possibility that I never will. I experience some repulsion, however not all the time. I still like affection and closeness, but I do not know if I can be with an allo partner ever. This paired with having autism, I feel like I’m doomed. :( I’ve been getting a depressed feeling over this recently and I don’t know what to do. I know there is more to life than having a partner, but I do honestly want one someday.

https://redd.it/1n9tupb
@asexualityonreddit
I am so confused about my sexuality! I've hit a quarter life crisis and I'm so scared - please help!

I have no idea if I'm asexual or not. I actually don't know what my sexuality is at all? I'm 25 years old and never been in a relationship or even kissed anyone, but for the longest time I've so badly wanted to be a Mum - it's all I've ever really wanted to do in life. I know there are other ways of being a parent but I don't think I'm mentally strong enough to do it alone. I'm struggling so much in life right now because I feel like I'm running out of time and so many different things are piling up and it feels like my life is falling appart, but out of everthing this is almost the thing that scares me the most. I really want to try figure myself out because I think I really need to do something about this now, and I figures this is probabaly the first step

I don't think I experience sexual attraction - how do you even know if you do??? Growing up when my friends would point out people they thought were attractive I never really understood what they meant. But I guess more in terms of when they would describe people at being 'hot' or like typical masculine attractivness. I do sometimes find guys attractive when they are on the more 'cute' looking side if, that makes sence.

I get obsessed with people/tv show characters quite often, like I usually go through hyperfixations on them, almost like platonic limerences. But if this person happens to be a boy then I actaully do think I find them attractive, but only after I've developed the hyperfixation/limerance thing - so I don't know if that means I could be more demisexual, like I only find them properly attractive once I have that emotional (parasocial) connection? But if the Limerence is with a girl I genuinely can't tell if that mean I like them as something more or if it is just platonic. Like sometimes I just think its more like this person is so inspiring I wish I was more like them and then my brain gets hyperfixated on that and boom.. limerance - but I don't know if that is me having a crush on someone and I'm just in denial about it. I don't even know what these are - hyperfixations, limerances, platonic limerances, crushes? I'm so confused!

All I really know is that dating and being in a relationship scares me so much and I have no want or motivation to be in one - as in going through the process of meeting someone and putting myself out there, but I really want kids and I actually really do want a relationship too, I just want to jump past the scary bit of meeting someone and jump to the already being comfortable around them part. I've always just hoped that I would be friends would someone first and then it would develop into a relationship, but I'm 25 and it still hasn't happened, and now I'm more confused lonely and scared than ever!

I was just wondering ifanyone have any ideas what this could all mean, or if anyone has any experience with going to a therapist to help figure this type of thing out?

Sincerely a very confused 25 year old! 🙏

https://redd.it/1n9wyeb
@asexualityonreddit
Finally tried garlic bread

Hi, don't know where else to post this but I need to share this life-changing experience.

For context I never liked garlic bread. It just didn't do it for me, so I never got the hype for it in the asexual community. Then a week ago I moved in with a host family in a different country for academic reasons, and last night they prepared pizza with garlic bread for dinner. The asexual instinct kicked in and I tried the bread with 0 expectations.

My eyes are open now. Turns out the garlic bread in my country was just trash, but real garlic bread? An absolute bliss. My mouth has been visited by the flavor angels. Needless to say I ate almost every piece.

I now understand all of you garlic bread enjoyers. I feel like I have received a divine vision and I'm happy to announce that from now on I'll gladly join you in this religion. Glory to garlic bread.

https://redd.it/1n9x3zo
@asexualityonreddit
For those that experience romantic attraction, do you find that you fall in love on the same or different timeline as allo-sexuals?

29F here, and I'm trying not to be a lesbian stereotype but considering I'm neurodivergent PLUS asexual I find that I don't really relate at all with allo people who say they MUST abide by the rule of waiting X amount of arbitrary months to decide if it's just "casual", to be exclusive, to be official partners, to say "i love you" etc etc.

I can certainly differentiate between knowing I'm attracted to someone for more than just their looks, and am attracted to them emotionally/romantically. I also do relate to the saying, "a crush is just a lack of information". Many times I've been attracted to or honestly utterly infatuated with someone and still got over it when I saw their clear incompatibility with me or their glaring flaws.

But anyway…currently... I am really falling for my girlfriend, but it's only been 1.5 months. I can't stress enough how comfortable and safe she makes me feel. This is also the first time I have ever been so attracted to someone emotionally WITHOUT feeling butterflies. For a little while I thought was a bad sign... like shouldn't one feel butterflies? But I think this is the reason why: As a neurodivergent person I feel like I'm constantly masking, but from day 1, I have felt completely safe to be myself around her. This is the most healthy and communicative relationship so far, and I feel secure despite me being historically anxiously attached to people. I have never once doubted her feelings in return for me. I just feel zero fear and uncertainty about her mutual feelings. She is a ray of sunshine. I want to say "I love you" so bad.

SHE IS ALSO THE SAME TYPE OF ASEXUAL AS ME. So I feel like I have won the lottery.

I just don't want to rush things accidentally, but how I feel towards her is so different from what I've felt for others in the past. I just don't want to accidentally say something I don't truly mean, or water down the word "love"... but I genuinely feel like I've never actually loved someone until now.

Am I in love or stupid lol?

https://redd.it/1na1akr
@asexualityonreddit
I dont know this can i be asexual?

Hi there, im new into the community.

I dont know anything about am i asexual. I'm 17yo. and i am girl.

I was test myself about my sexual orientation for fun. And the test results are here: 17% heterosexual and 14% homosexual (asexual). And the thing what i see about asexuality made me so disturbed. And i solved a lit tests again and the results are AGAINST asexuality.

I hate sex and im so disturbed about sex. I can't handle to see people with chat about sex. And i'm so disturbed to read spicy scenes in books. Generally i am skipping when i read.

However, I'm Muslim and i dont know is asexuality haram guys? Appreciate helps.

https://redd.it/1na4eem
@asexualityonreddit
Found this cursed asexual flag in my gallery, it's a bit blurry but it's funny and true 🙃
https://redd.it/1naapjg
@asexualityonreddit
Ok sooo, i have a question



( fyi, this post is not abt me bc i am not really into naked cuddling. I dont really care abt it )


Is there anyone here who likes naked cuddling or just like feeling someones skin in a romantic or sensual manner but not sexually?

Bc i know there are some asexuals who are into different types of intimacy and all but i never heard some who would mention naked cuddling


And i got curious abt asking that ig


So yeah, like i said. Os there anyone who is into naked cuddling or just likes feeling someones skin without it being sexual.
Or just desire skin to skin contacts with someone but dont desire sex with them and still be asexual ( i dont Even know if it counts as sexual attraction…..tbh…attractions are complicated )

I would like to know!


https://redd.it/1naeywu
@asexualityonreddit
Anybody else find it difficult

It’s so hard making any connections with people when they hear you’re asexual.

https://redd.it/1nah6gr
@asexualityonreddit
It’s the little things honestly

I very recently came out to my partner (of 6 years) as graysexual. I have been super nervous to do this because we’ve already been having trouble with sex drives not matching for the last several years and I felt like this would just be another thing that caused problems…

However, we were recently in a little comic shop looking around and as we were leaving he stopped me to show me these mini DnD dice that he had got for me. He excitedly explained that he picked them out because they are the color of the ace flag.

I know it is such a small little thing but it honestly melted my heart into a freaking puddle. He told me he had looked up the flag because he wasn’t sure of the colors and wanted to confirm before showing them to me. It was just so thoughtful and validating and I just feel so seen.

It really is the littlest of things sometimes!


https://redd.it/1nam4u1
@asexualityonreddit
Pretty sure I’m asexual.

I (30f) haven’t had sex in years and can see myself never having it again. I have had some nice hookups, but I have gone through looong lags of sexual inactivity over many years. Never have had a boyfriend. Most of the guys I see really gross me out and I wouldn’t let them come anywhere near me.

https://redd.it/1naoqif
@asexualityonreddit