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I appreciate you all but like 80% of my friends are ace and I'd like a bit more diversity in there so could you please ease up on it a bit
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How long until you can identify as Ace?
Had to block someone on this sub right now because they said that people who are newly Ace don't really count as Ace because they don't understand Ace suffering.
So is there a waiting period after identifying as Ace before you can call yourself Ace, or is there a requisite amount of suffering before you're properly Ace as they seemed to believe?
(They also said you become Ace and seem to believe it's not something you're born as. I know some people can become Ace from trauma, but that's different.)
Edit: if you down voted this, person I'm talking about, stop gatekeeping. The other Ace sub is right there and waiting.
https://redd.it/1mw90c1
@asexualityonreddit
Had to block someone on this sub right now because they said that people who are newly Ace don't really count as Ace because they don't understand Ace suffering.
So is there a waiting period after identifying as Ace before you can call yourself Ace, or is there a requisite amount of suffering before you're properly Ace as they seemed to believe?
(They also said you become Ace and seem to believe it's not something you're born as. I know some people can become Ace from trauma, but that's different.)
Edit: if you down voted this, person I'm talking about, stop gatekeeping. The other Ace sub is right there and waiting.
https://redd.it/1mw90c1
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Problems with my project to put up 100 asexual flags in Denmark
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I'm a little frustrated
As the title suggests I'm a little frustrated with the asexual community. I've seen quite a few posts of people asking if SA trauma can cause asexuality and a lot of comments saying "no it can't that's not asexuality that's just trauma" and completely invalidating the persons feelings. On the other hand I've seen some comments saying "yes I believe it can be caused by trauma but some people are just asexual because that's simply how they feel." which I really appreciated cause I feel they didn't try to invalidate anyone. The reason this frustrates me so much is because, whatever your opinion is I'm not judging you, it can be caused by that type of trauma especially CSA(Which I am a victim of) it's called caedsexual(it is a subdivision of asexual) and it literally means that you are asexual as a result of some type of trauma usually SA related. I'm not saying you have to be traumatized in order to be asexual but that doesn't mean that someone can't be asexual as a result of it. Idk I guess I'm just frustrated I know not everyone in the asexual community is likethat but still it's frustrating to see this in a community that is so diverse and usually pretty understanding of peoples situation.
https://redd.it/1mwebmc
@asexualityonreddit
As the title suggests I'm a little frustrated with the asexual community. I've seen quite a few posts of people asking if SA trauma can cause asexuality and a lot of comments saying "no it can't that's not asexuality that's just trauma" and completely invalidating the persons feelings. On the other hand I've seen some comments saying "yes I believe it can be caused by trauma but some people are just asexual because that's simply how they feel." which I really appreciated cause I feel they didn't try to invalidate anyone. The reason this frustrates me so much is because, whatever your opinion is I'm not judging you, it can be caused by that type of trauma especially CSA(Which I am a victim of) it's called caedsexual(it is a subdivision of asexual) and it literally means that you are asexual as a result of some type of trauma usually SA related. I'm not saying you have to be traumatized in order to be asexual but that doesn't mean that someone can't be asexual as a result of it. Idk I guess I'm just frustrated I know not everyone in the asexual community is likethat but still it's frustrating to see this in a community that is so diverse and usually pretty understanding of peoples situation.
https://redd.it/1mwebmc
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Like how does that work?! I’d still be mad as hell about the situation. What kind of beastly urges make you forget what has happened??
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https://redd.it/1mwl909
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I may be asexual but I’m not sure
I (21 F) have always had a bad relationship with sex and intimacy. I almost never masturbate, most of the time I don’t want to do it and even if I do it’s always the other one who has to initiate. Right now I’m seeing a guy and this thing created conflicts between us, since he felt like I wasn’t sexually attracted to him and he wanted to have intercourse. I explained to him that I’ve been struggling with the topic all my life and that it’s not that easy for me to just let go and enjoy the moment.
It’s been better the last days, we did foreplay and had sex, it went well, the thing is, I get horny, I’m able to have orgasms and if I’m in the mood the thing is pleasant overall. On the other hand, I could live without and be fine and I prefer cuddling and late night talking over sex, if I don’t feel like it and the person in front of me suggests it or initiate it I shut down and refuse to do it. This guy, along with some other people, suggested I may be asexual, I think it’s a possibility as well but I can’t say it with certainty. What do you think?
https://redd.it/1mwk3pa
@asexualityonreddit
I (21 F) have always had a bad relationship with sex and intimacy. I almost never masturbate, most of the time I don’t want to do it and even if I do it’s always the other one who has to initiate. Right now I’m seeing a guy and this thing created conflicts between us, since he felt like I wasn’t sexually attracted to him and he wanted to have intercourse. I explained to him that I’ve been struggling with the topic all my life and that it’s not that easy for me to just let go and enjoy the moment.
It’s been better the last days, we did foreplay and had sex, it went well, the thing is, I get horny, I’m able to have orgasms and if I’m in the mood the thing is pleasant overall. On the other hand, I could live without and be fine and I prefer cuddling and late night talking over sex, if I don’t feel like it and the person in front of me suggests it or initiate it I shut down and refuse to do it. This guy, along with some other people, suggested I may be asexual, I think it’s a possibility as well but I can’t say it with certainty. What do you think?
https://redd.it/1mwk3pa
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I don’t get sex. I just like being stepped on and berated and owned. Idk if I qualify as asexual
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I will probably leave this community after seeing posts tied to sexual questions
I’m not holding anything against anyone, but lately there’s been sexual questions floating around that it’s left me feeling… unsure and slightly unsafe. I finally found a label that fits me perfectly that being asexual—one that reflects my lack of sexual attraction and connects to my experiences as a survivor of sexual assault. Then I saw someone say, “No, it can’t be asexuality; that’s just trauma,” and it really pushed me away. I’m still new to this whole asexuality thing, and now I’m questioning whether this community is the right place for me. I could be wrong, but I just feel… off, if that makes any sense please be respectful im already in a weird place.
https://redd.it/1mwuvwc
@asexualityonreddit
I’m not holding anything against anyone, but lately there’s been sexual questions floating around that it’s left me feeling… unsure and slightly unsafe. I finally found a label that fits me perfectly that being asexual—one that reflects my lack of sexual attraction and connects to my experiences as a survivor of sexual assault. Then I saw someone say, “No, it can’t be asexuality; that’s just trauma,” and it really pushed me away. I’m still new to this whole asexuality thing, and now I’m questioning whether this community is the right place for me. I could be wrong, but I just feel… off, if that makes any sense please be respectful im already in a weird place.
https://redd.it/1mwuvwc
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Ace Ring as Wedding Ring?
I've been thinking lately about buying an ace ring(I found a really cute one with a little ace of spades on it😊). Although I'm not in a relationship currently I hope to be in one eventually. I was wondering if it would be ok to use an ace ring as a wedding ring. Although it's tradition to wear a wedding ring on the ring finger there's no rule that says you have to, so I feel like this should be ok with most people, but I wanted to know if within the asexual community people feel like this is misrepresenting thre rings symbolism or if it's just a representation of my somewhat different relationship with my future signifigant other
https://redd.it/1mwu6z7
@asexualityonreddit
I've been thinking lately about buying an ace ring(I found a really cute one with a little ace of spades on it😊). Although I'm not in a relationship currently I hope to be in one eventually. I was wondering if it would be ok to use an ace ring as a wedding ring. Although it's tradition to wear a wedding ring on the ring finger there's no rule that says you have to, so I feel like this should be ok with most people, but I wanted to know if within the asexual community people feel like this is misrepresenting thre rings symbolism or if it's just a representation of my somewhat different relationship with my future signifigant other
https://redd.it/1mwu6z7
@asexualityonreddit
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