Asexuality and Aromanticism on Reddit
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Mirror of /r/asexuality, /r/asexual, /r/aaaaaaacccccccce and /r/aromanticism.

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Why are most aces alloromantic?



I think alloromantic aces are totally valid, I’m just really confused why they’re the majority.

I found this poll someone did

https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/qa81pv/howmanyacesarealsoaromanticaquickpoll/?utmsource=share&utmmedium=iosapp&utmname=iossmf, which made it seem like most aces are alloromantic. That surprised me. I really hadn’t expected it to be the majority. I’ve checked other polls and they’ve had similar results.


This poll separates it out into the different orientations https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/quoj9d/whatiseveryonesromanticorientation/?utmsource=share&utmmedium=iosapp&utmname=iossmf. In polls like that it seems to always be VERY SLIGHTLY more common than any individual romantic orientation but way less than when you add the heteroromantics, homoromantics, and bi/panromantics together. Though “unsure” seems to always have a LOT of votes.


Maybe most of the people who are unsure are actually aro and just don’t realize it. Maybe it’s just uncommon for aromantic people to be certain that they’re aromantic because it’s so hard to know that you don’t feel romantic attraction if you don’t know what it even is.


But maybe not. Maybe it really is more common. That’s weird to me. The vast majority of heterosexual people are heteroromantic. The vast majority of homosexual people are homoromantic. Of course it’s probably unlikely for allosexual people to have heard of the split attraction model before so we wouldn’t really be able to know if lots of them don’t match, but I would still expect the majority of them to match their sexual orientation.


Why are there more alloromantic aces than aromantic aces? Does that imply that asexuality, although still 100% valid as a sexual orientation, is somehow fundamentally different from other sexual orientations? I’m not sure if I’m comfortable with that, but it’s seems to be the case.

https://redd.it/r8tsrw
@asexualityonreddit
I have a question

Right so I have a friend how's asexual and I asked her a question the other day and she wasn't really sure how to answer so I have come to the source of all knowledge, Reddit.

Basically my question is this. So if your asexual and but your interested in girls, how do you define that in words. Like are there specific words you can use to express that.

The analogy I used with my friend was if you had a dating profile and you said you were asexual on it, how would you tell people what gender you want to have a relationship with.

If you don't understand then ask me to try and explain it again, thanks. P.s. I don't think I'm ace I'm just wondering.

https://redd.it/r8t2zr
@asexualityonreddit
A stands for ally... Love r/AreTheStraightsOk but erasure still feels 🤮
https://redd.it/r8wjmb
@asexualityonreddit
Should I tell my husband I'm asexual?

I'm 24F, got married in August, and have internally thought of myself as asexual since around age 15.

I came out to a few friends when I was younger, and when I started dating my husband when I was 19, I got a lot of "ha ha, how crazy, I can't believe you ever thought you were asexual!" comments.

He is the first person I've properly dated. I've had sex with multiple people before him (varying genders), never felt anything, and never pursued relationships with them. This was a kind of phase where I was "testing" my sexuality, if I have to explain it so bluntly.

I absolutely LOVE my husband. He's the most beautiful person I've ever seen, we have so much in common, we have so much fun together. When we have sex, I feel love for him, but I don't feel sexually aroused.

I don't want to tell him because I don't want him to think I'm "faking" anything when we have sex. I'm happy to do it and I know that sex makes him happy, so I don't want to tell him something that will compromise his enjoyment.

This has been my dilemma for over 5 years now. Please tell me what to do, and if I'm hurting him more by keeping this a secret from him.

https://redd.it/r8yt0f
@asexualityonreddit
Does sex/masturbation feel clinical to you?

hey! I recently figured out that I'm somewhere on the ace spectrum and I was wondering if anyone else feels like a robot when they have sex. I'm not sex repulsed and I only really do it to make my husband happy, since I'm indifferent to it. But it always feels like work, or a task I need to complete. And then afterwards I just feel nothing. Am I alone in this??

https://redd.it/r8ztni
@asexualityonreddit