Asexuals with OCD MIGHT understand this joke ( this is not a good joke i am sorry. Pls real the post before commenting )

https://redd.it/1n9h911
@asexualityonreddit

Saying that victims of abuse can't be asexual is bigotry

And that's also one of the worst things you could say to survivors. This post it not targeted at anyone in specific, but rather at how people are still portraying and stigmatizing asexuality by "gatekeeping" the label, not even knowing that asexuality is a spectrum + this kind of behavior is actually harmful. A victim feeling comfortable in a label doesn't means that the propaganda of "all asexual people are traumatized!" is being implanted, and neither should be compared to imposing sexuality is "a sickness that should be cured". I'm convinced that anyone who defends such ideas I refered to in the quotations are not only victim blaming victims of abuse, but also excluding them from safe spaces. I'm saying that as someone who's a survivor + asexual.

https://redd.it/1n9jrpe
@asexualityonreddit

How do I tell my partner about changed view on sex

Hello!
I have been in a relationship for almost a year now and my demisexual partner has always been truly fine and very understanding with us not having sex. And they said they would also be fine with never having sex if I wanted it that way. For a really long time I wasnt sure if I would ever want to sleep with them and could genuinely see myself never having sex ever again (also partially due to other factors than being ace). But recently I‘ve been leaning more toward „I wouldnt mind sleeping with them and maybe I would actually enjoy it“. Now I kinda wanna tell them about this change (our communication is pretty good I‘d say, so I do feel like its the natural way to go) but I just dont really know how to tell them. I feel like just bluntly being like „Hey, I think I wouldn’t mind sleeing with you after all“ would be a bit weird, but maybe thats just me.

Any advice on how I could go about it?

https://redd.it/1n9fwd2
@asexualityonreddit

As an asexual person, I feel our love is monk-like. Curious if anyone relates.

I’ve been reflecting on my experiences as an asexual person dating sexual partners.

What I’ve felt is that when I love, it’s not connected to lust or the biological pull of sex. For me, love is about companionship, trust, presence, and care — it feels very intentional, almost monk-like.

In contrast, when I’ve dated sexual people, I sometimes felt their version of love was heavily mixed with desire for sex. It made me wonder- is asexual love in some way “purer” because it isn’t driven by lust?

I’m not saying one is superior or inferior — just that they feel very different. Like two different instruments playing the same melody: one stripped down and hauntingly pure, the other richer and layered.

Do any other asexual (or even sexual) people feel this difference? Is it fair to see asexual love as unique, or am I romanticizing my own perspective?

Would really love to hear your thoughts and experiences.

https://redd.it/1n9n4um
@asexualityonreddit

Has anyone ACTUALLY ever been in a QPR?

I've read about queerplatonic relationships (QPRs) on websites online, on Reddit, and even in a couple books relating to asexuality. But I've never seen or heard of someone actually being in a QPR - not on Reddit, and definitely not in real life. The most common circumstance I've read about is an asexual person is in a relationship with an allosexual person, and one/both has to compromise in some way.

So are QPRs actually possible, or is it more of a theoretical dream in online spaces? Im thinking since there are so few people worldwide who actually want this type of relationship, it's unlikely that they'd find each other AND be a good enough match.

If you are in a real QPR could you share your experience?

https://redd.it/1n9p5rz
@asexualityonreddit

Asexual Icon provides much needed wisdom😔🙏
https://redd.it/1n9s5fm
@asexualityonreddit

Sad with how oversexualized and objectified women are

With how men exclusively get into art to draw big breasted anime girls with extremely smooth and shiny skin and NO texture or hair in sight on their skin. Everyone’s first reaction to silksong hype and its release is to draw heavily sexualized art of hornet with huge breasts and a curvy figure that she canonically does NOT have literally just because she’s a woman. Literally no one else has done that with the male/nonbinary protagonists of previously extremely hyped games. And no one ever draws sexualized art of men either, they just want to torment the women because men can’t control their hormones. And then everyone wonders why I have such a complicated and resentful view of my own femininity if people are just going to draw my (former) gender like this

https://redd.it/1n9sj3c
@asexualityonreddit

Def confirmed I’m Ace

I’m really drunk so sorry if this is incoherent. For a long time I have identified as ace but always had this voice in the back of my head telling me that I just hadn’t found the right person. WELL my friends just started having a threesome in-front of me and I’m DEFINITELY not attracted lmao. Sitting in the living room now just letting them have their fun haha.

https://redd.it/1n9ttrl
@asexualityonreddit

Scared I won’t find a partner

I’m 27F, I don’t feel in a rush to start a relationship with someone, but I do worry about the possibility that I never will. I experience some repulsion, however not all the time. I still like affection and closeness, but I do not know if I can be with an allo partner ever. This paired with having autism, I feel like I’m doomed. :( I’ve been getting a depressed feeling over this recently and I don’t know what to do. I know there is more to life than having a partner, but I do honestly want one someday.

https://redd.it/1n9tupb
@asexualityonreddit

I am so confused about my sexuality! I've hit a quarter life crisis and I'm so scared - please help!

I have no idea if I'm asexual or not. I actually don't know what my sexuality is at all? I'm 25 years old and never been in a relationship or even kissed anyone, but for the longest time I've so badly wanted to be a Mum - it's all I've ever really wanted to do in life. I know there are other ways of being a parent but I don't think I'm mentally strong enough to do it alone. I'm struggling so much in life right now because I feel like I'm running out of time and so many different things are piling up and it feels like my life is falling appart, but out of everthing this is almost the thing that scares me the most. I really want to try figure myself out because I think I really need to do something about this now, and I figures this is probabaly the first step

I don't think I experience sexual attraction - how do you even know if you do??? Growing up when my friends would point out people they thought were attractive I never really understood what they meant. But I guess more in terms of when they would describe people at being 'hot' or like typical masculine attractivness. I do sometimes find guys attractive when they are on the more 'cute' looking side if, that makes sence.

I get obsessed with people/tv show characters quite often, like I usually go through hyperfixations on them, almost like platonic limerences. But if this person happens to be a boy then I actaully do think I find them attractive, but only after I've developed the hyperfixation/limerance thing - so I don't know if that means I could be more demisexual, like I only find them properly attractive once I have that emotional (parasocial) connection? But if the Limerence is with a girl I genuinely can't tell if that mean I like them as something more or if it is just platonic. Like sometimes I just think its more like this person is so inspiring I wish I was more like them and then my brain gets hyperfixated on that and boom.. limerance - but I don't know if that is me having a crush on someone and I'm just in denial about it. I don't even know what these are - hyperfixations, limerances, platonic limerances, crushes? I'm so confused!

All I really know is that dating and being in a relationship scares me so much and I have no want or motivation to be in one - as in going through the process of meeting someone and putting myself out there, but I really want kids and I actually really do want a relationship too, I just want to jump past the scary bit of meeting someone and jump to the already being comfortable around them part. I've always just hoped that I would be friends would someone first and then it would develop into a relationship, but I'm 25 and it still hasn't happened, and now I'm more confused lonely and scared than ever!

I was just wondering ifanyone have any ideas what this could all mean, or if anyone has any experience with going to a therapist to help figure this type of thing out?

Sincerely a very confused 25 year old! 🙏

https://redd.it/1n9wyeb
@asexualityonreddit

Finally tried garlic bread

Hi, don't know where else to post this but I need to share this life-changing experience.

For context I never liked garlic bread. It just didn't do it for me, so I never got the hype for it in the asexual community. Then a week ago I moved in with a host family in a different country for academic reasons, and last night they prepared pizza with garlic bread for dinner. The asexual instinct kicked in and I tried the bread with 0 expectations.

My eyes are open now. Turns out the garlic bread in my country was just trash, but real garlic bread? An absolute bliss. My mouth has been visited by the flavor angels. Needless to say I ate almost every piece.

I now understand all of you garlic bread enjoyers. I feel like I have received a divine vision and I'm happy to announce that from now on I'll gladly join you in this religion. Glory to garlic bread.

https://redd.it/1n9x3zo
@asexualityonreddit

Any ace from Karnataka or Bangalore?

27y old ace guy from Bangalore like to connect with other aces around

https://redd.it/1na25vq
@asexualityonreddit

For those that experience romantic attraction, do you find that you fall in love on the same or different timeline as allo-sexuals?

29F here, and I'm trying not to be a lesbian stereotype but considering I'm neurodivergent PLUS asexual I find that I don't really relate at all with allo people who say they MUST abide by the rule of waiting X amount of arbitrary months to decide if it's just "casual", to be exclusive, to be official partners, to say "i love you" etc etc.

I can certainly differentiate between knowing I'm attracted to someone for more than just their looks, and am attracted to them emotionally/romantically. I also do relate to the saying, "a crush is just a lack of information". Many times I've been attracted to or honestly utterly infatuated with someone and still got over it when I saw their clear incompatibility with me or their glaring flaws.

But anyway…currently... I am really falling for my girlfriend, but it's only been 1.5 months. I can't stress enough how comfortable and safe she makes me feel. This is also the first time I have ever been so attracted to someone emotionally WITHOUT feeling butterflies. For a little while I thought was a bad sign... like shouldn't one feel butterflies? But I think this is the reason why: As a neurodivergent person I feel like I'm constantly masking, but from day 1, I have felt completely safe to be myself around her. This is the most healthy and communicative relationship so far, and I feel secure despite me being historically anxiously attached to people. I have never once doubted her feelings in return for me. I just feel zero fear and uncertainty about her mutual feelings. She is a ray of sunshine. I want to say "I love you" so bad.

SHE IS ALSO THE SAME TYPE OF ASEXUAL AS ME. So I feel like I have won the lottery.

I just don't want to rush things accidentally, but how I feel towards her is so different from what I've felt for others in the past. I just don't want to accidentally say something I don't truly mean, or water down the word "love"... but I genuinely feel like I've never actually loved someone until now.

Am I in love or stupid lol?

https://redd.it/1na1akr
@asexualityonreddit

I dont know this can i be asexual?

Hi there, im new into the community.

I dont know anything about am i asexual. I'm 17yo. and i am girl.

I was test myself about my sexual orientation for fun. And the test results are here: 17% heterosexual and 14% homosexual (asexual). And the thing what i see about asexuality made me so disturbed. And i solved a lit tests again and the results are AGAINST asexuality.

I hate sex and im so disturbed about sex. I can't handle to see people with chat about sex. And i'm so disturbed to read spicy scenes in books. Generally i am skipping when i read.

However, I'm Muslim and i dont know is asexuality haram guys? Appreciate helps.

https://redd.it/1na4eem
@asexualityonreddit

What was it for you?
https://redd.it/1na74o5
@asexualityonreddit

Who else is ace and trans?

I was just curious if any of us exist

https://redd.it/1na6ryx
@asexualityonreddit

I found it watching YouTube
https://redd.it/1na9s6i
@asexualityonreddit

Found this cursed asexual flag in my gallery, it's a bit blurry but it's funny and true 🙃
https://redd.it/1naapjg
@asexualityonreddit