The Alchemist's Shack
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"ey ceo what should we make the specs for the phone"
*snorts line off of a hookers tits*
"fucken send it"
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Looking through their entire phone catalog, every single one of those things has some gimmick thats just absolutely insane
Standard shit on almost all phones: digital night vision, thermal cam, huge battery (6000-15000mah), rugged as shit, connection port for endoscopes and microscopes
then comes the insane shit like:
122dB speaker
2Tb expendable storage
200MP cam
60x zoom microscope
wireless charging OTHER devices
built in walkie talkie
built in bluetooth earbuds
1000 lumen lamp + 20000mah battery
next gen thermal cam with dedicated gpu just for that
satellite connection
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they took autists as their target audience and tripled down on that niche, then ate a full roll of pervitin before coming up with the features for each phone
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i dont know where ulefone came from, i dont know how they manage to put all this shit into phones and i certainly dont know how they make them this fucking cheap considering those fucking specs but holy shit do i know who im buying my next phone from (after my cat phone breaks in 5+ years)
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The Alchemist's Shack
(after my cat phone breaks in 5+ years)
well i say breaks but i doubt thats actually gonna happen
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Just under 3L of bourbon have been obtained
1L is pushing it a bit into the feints but i.hope itll turn out alright
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Forwarded from So far, so good (РКН Π΅Π·ΠΈ6Π΅ (#045))
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