Full Body 1:

Firstly, cities offer a broader range of job opportunities for individuals seeking career advancement. Since most of the big companies are located in the cities, there is more need for the labor force. German cities such as Hamburg and Berlin are some of the pertinent examples, where both local and foreign workforce can secure relevant job positions in various fields. Additionally, cities are the home of educational facilities meaning that most of top-tier universities and well-known learning centers are located in urban areas. This is why the majority of urban dwellers can get quality education without having to spend to much time to commute.

We could have written a summarizing sentence as well but this is already good enough in terms of length. So why not focus on the second body paragraph now.

Write a topic sentence indicating your opinion.

2nd Body Topic Sentence: In spite of the abovementioned advantages, l believe that living in the countriside offers more benefits.

Now, let's introduce our first main idea.

P.S. for those who have recently joined this channel, this essay is being written by the channel's subscribers. Feel free to contribute your own sentence! It is a collective writing task .and I am mainly just guiding what to write but refraining from correcting any mistakes just yet.

Firstly, living in rural areas can offer less polluted environment.

Let’s take a break for now.

I have a live lesson. So will be back when it is over. Thank you!

Alright, I am back! So, here is what we have so far:

2nd Body:
In spite of the above mentioned advantages, l believe that living in the countriside offers more benefits. Firstly, living in rural areas can offer less polluted environment.

Let's now continue with the next sentence where we should explain the first main argument further.

According to the statistics provided by the WHO, those who live in urban environments have 20% less likelihood of facing illnesses result from pollution such as asthma and anemia.

Ok, so moving on to the second point.

Generally lower prices in the countryside is another benefit for residents.

Ok, now explain what you mean by that!

These places can offer a cleaner environment and a more affordable lifestyle compared to cities.

Now, let’s move on to the conclusion paragraph.

1st sentence: write a sentence summarizing the main points from each body paragraph. You can just mention one argument from each side.

In conclusion, although cities offer more job opportunities and educational facilities, I'm still of the view that living in the countryside has more benefits, ranging from the healthy lifestyle to the lower cost of living.

It a bit wordy, but we can accept it. I would, however, write two separate sentences.

Ana endi kimdir butun essayimizi copy paste qibersa, AI ga tekshirtirib ballini bilib olamiz.

Nima deb o’ylaysizlar bugun nech ballik essay yozdinglar?

#CollectiveWriting

Here is the full essay that you have all contributed.

I think this essay has turned out much better than the last time! Good job, everyone!

With a few tweaks here and there, the essay could be improved to band 7.0.

It is argued by some that it is good to live in the outside of city, others, belief living in an urban area have more benefits. While it is understandable that city life can offer better living conditions and employment opportunities, I believe that living in the countryside is much better due to its healthy and less stressful.

There are two clear advantages, mostly related to socioeconomic factors, to living in the city.Firstly, cities offer a broader range of job opportunities for individuals seeking career advancement. Since most of the big companies are located in the cities, there is more need for the labor force. German cities such as Hamburg and Berlin are some of the pertinent examples, where both local and foreign workforce can secure relevant job positions in various fields. Additionally, cities are the home of educational facilities meaning that most of top-tier universities and well-known learning centers are located in urban areas. This is why the majority of urban dwellers can get quality education without having to spend to much time to commute.

In spite of the above mentioned advantages, l believe that living in the countriside offers more benefits. Firstly, living in rural areas can offer less polluted environment. According to the statistics provided by the WHO, those who live in urban environments have 20% less likelihood of facing illnesses result from pollution such as asthma and anemia. Generally lower prices in the countryside is another benefit for residents. To be more precise, unlike in cities living costs are not so high in villages, since most products are first-hand and grown by villagers themselves. Likewise, villages are not overcrowded, which means accommodation is also affordable.

In conclusion, although cities offer more job opportunities and educational facilities, I'm still of the view that living in the countryside has more benefits, ranging from the healthy lifestyle to the lower cost of living.

The following assessment is provided by a specially trained version of ChatGPT (GPT-4).

### Band Score Estimate: 6.0

#### Task Response: 6
- Strengths: The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides an opinion, which is required by the task. You offer examples to support your points, such as the reference to German cities and WHO statistics.
- Areas for Improvement: There is some misalignment between your opinion and the arguments presented. For instance, in the introduction, you mention the countryside as less stressful but do not explicitly develop this idea in the body paragraphs. Additionally, the essay could benefit from more balance in discussing both views, as the section on city life feels underdeveloped compared to the discussion of rural living.

#### Coherence and Cohesion: 6
- Strengths: The essay has a clear structure, with distinct paragraphs that discuss the views and your opinion. Linking words like "firstly," "additionally," and "in spite of" help guide the reader.
- Areas for Improvement: Some sentences are awkwardly structured, leading to confusion, such as “it is good to live in the outside of city” and “those who live in urban environments have 20% less likelihood.” Also, the connection between your points could be stronger to improve overall cohesion. The transition between ideas, particularly in the paragraph about city life, feels somewhat abrupt.

#### Lexical Resource: 6
- Strengths: The essay uses a range of vocabulary, such as "socioeconomic factors," "pertinent examples," and "commute." The language is generally appropriate for the task.
- Areas for Improvement: There are occasional issues with word choice and formality. For example, "belief" should be "believe," and "top-tier universities" could be expressed more formally. Additionally, there are minor errors in collocation and expression, such as "living costs are not so high in villages."

#### Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5
- Strengths: The essay attempts complex sentence structures and uses appropriate verb tenses.
- Areas for Improvement: There are several grammatical errors that impede understanding. For instance, “others, belief living in an urban area have more benefits” should be “others believe that living in an urban area has more benefits.” The sentence structure in some areas is awkward and affects readability. Additionally, there are errors in article usage, prepositions, and punctuation, such as “outside of city” instead of “outside the city.”

### Recommendations for Improvement:
1. Refine Task Response: Ensure that the points in the introduction are fully developed in the body paragraphs. Also, balance the discussion of both views.
2. Improve Coherence and Cohesion: Work on smoother transitions between ideas and clearer connections between your arguments.
3. Expand Lexical Resource: Continue to build your vocabulary, paying attention to correct collocations and more formal expressions.
4. Enhance Grammatical Accuracy: Focus on reducing errors in sentence structure, verb agreement, and articles. Proofreading and grammar exercises can help with this.

By addressing these areas, you can improve your overall band score.

Collective effort da, ya’ni turli xil darajadagi candidate lar qo’shilib yozganda, essayda albatta kamchiliklar bo’lishi tabiiy xol. The main thing is learning. Paragraflar yozishni practice qilib, Discuss both views ga qanaqa essay yozish kerakligini yana bir eslab oldilaring degan umiddaman!

#Task2

O’tgan safar sizlar bilan “Discuss both views and give your own opinion” savoliga essay yozgandik va structure bilan tanishgandik.

Agar sizga “To what extent do you agree or disagree?” savolli essay tushsa, siz qanday structure dan foydalanishiz kerak?

Pauline Cullen, in her latest Writing Task 2 book, presents this useful table.

Ya’ni, Agree Disagree savoliga ham savoldan va o’z tajribangizdan kelib chiqib, 3 xil yondashish mumkin ekan.

Kitob muallifi o’zi aynan (A) approachni ko’proq ishlatishini ta’kidlab o’tadi. Lekin shaxsan man (B) approach bilan ham Task 2 da 8+ olganman.

I want to share a juicy part of my current Writing Marathon (WM 24):

For each question type, I provide students with a detailed guide on how to approach it.

The following day, we use this guide to answer an authentic question during our live lesson.

At the end of the week, students are given a similar question as part of their homework.

And that’s just one-third of what we do during this marathon.

Bu kanalga anchadan beri post qo'ymadim, lekin bugun sizlar uchun ajoyib bir post tayyorladim.

Ingliz tilida yozganda, qisqa va lo'nda qilib yozish juda muhim. Ammo ko'pchiligimiz fikrimizni yetkazishda ortiqcha so'zlardan ko'p foydalanamiz. Yaqinda o'quvchilarning essaylarini o'qiyotganimda, aynan shu narsa e'tiborimni tortdi. O'zimning oldin yozgan bitta Task 2 essayimni olib, GPT orqali redundant language (ortiqcha so'zlar) ni aniqlab, less redundant qilib ber dedim. Natijada, 351 so'zli essay 242 so'zga qisqardi.

Siz ushbu faylda Redundancy Reduction bo'yicha umumiy ma'lumot olib, undan keyin mening 2022-yilda yozilgan inshoimni to'liq o'qib, har bir gapda redundancy (ortiqcha so'zlar) qanday kamaytirilganini ko'rishingiz mumkin bo'ladi.

#WritingQuestions

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Thank you for your cooperation!

This week, as part of my ongoing Writing Marathon, I’ll be teaching Problem & Solution Essays.

As some of you may know, I create a comprehensive guide for each question type. For this week’s guide, I’ve decided to include a quick formula for crafting an effective introduction.

While I usually advise against using memorized lines, these can be valuable for saving precious time during the exam.

I’ve just enabled the “star” reaction. Give it a try! 😎

from Scientific American

Shall I post the article so you can lift some useful chunks of language?