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There's blood everywhere and I feel like shit. But, after a visit to the hospital, they help me and I am still alive and ready to move on with my life. And the next time I shoot myself, in the moment, I feel bad... but then I look back in the previous instances I've shot myself and how it all worked out, and I feel calm. Some people even suggested things like "Hey, instead of shooting yourself in your thighs, have you considered going to a restaurant? Maybe go watch a movie or something?" But... that's unpredictable. What if I end up hating the food at the restaurant or if the movie at the cinema is insanely boring? That's unpredictable. That's why I keep with the ole reliable. Alternatively.....Todd Bowles.... Folks ain't gonna keep patient with you. That stoic person...'We gotta execute better,' that was all cool, but we give that grace to inexperienced coordinators. Big dawg, you're supposed to be our Head Coach, and you're coaching like a bum... I bet you better start doing your job 🤜🤜
18. | (/IND) | Colts | -7 | 8-5 | Losing Daniel Jones to a torn Achilles would've been bad enough, but the Colts' defense was ready to give this game to the Jags even before that season-ending injury. Now Indy is turning to a Hail Mary attempt to save the season by bringing ~~Uncle~~ Grandpa Philip Rivers in for a workout, hoping to coax him out of a 5-year retirement and reset his Hall of Fame eligibility. It might sound insane, but at least that would be must-watch football … right?
19. | (/DAL) | Cowboys | -2 | 6-6-1 | Well, that sucked. Apparently the team just didn't gameplan for the Sun God being on the field, and failed to adjust when he was. The managed to contain Gibbs on the ground, except in the red zone. Fortunately, Dan Campbell contained David Montgomery for them. Kickoff coverage was atrocious, Ceedee got a concussion, and Cowboys fans got their first look of the version of George Pickens the Steelers traded away. The upside is that Pickens apologized to the coaches, the coaches feel confident it was a one-off, Ryan Flournoy broke out, Ceedee appears to be progressing through the protocol, and the wheels are still falling off in Philly despite their positivity bunny, meaning a division win is still in reach.
20. | (/BAL) | Ravens | -1 | 6-7 | Bull-SHIT! Bull-SHIT! Bull-SHIT!
21. | (/MIA) | Dolphins | +1 | 6-7 | After a dismantling of the Jets, the Dolphins are one of the hottest teams in the league right now with their four game win streak. This victory came a bit differently though as instead of it being the Devon Achane show, Jaylen Wright and Ollie Gordon got involved and looked pretty good after Achane left the game early out of precaution. With the way the other Week 14 games broke, the team's slim playoff hopes got even slimmer, as even winning out would only give them a small chance of making the playoffs. Still, they might as well try to build some positive momentum going into next season, and excerise the cold weather game demons in the process.
22. | (/CIN) | Bengals | -1 | 4-9 | I need to sound angry so I’m gonna do this blurb in German. Just imagine me yelling all this at a podium to a crowd of people or something………………........Ihr dachtet, es hätte sich etwas geändert. Ihr dachtet, die Dinge könnten anders sein. Lasst euch das eine Lehre sein: Es sind immer noch die alten Bengals. Dieses Team ist in den grundlegendsten Aspekten des Footballs immer noch miserabel. Ja, die Rückkehr von Joe Burrow hilft zwar, aber dieses Team kriegt trotzdem nichts auf die Reihe. Die Bills haben selbst jede Menge Probleme, schaffen es aber trotzdem zu gewinnen – das genaue Gegenteil von diesem Team, das nichts anderes tut als zu verlieren. Das ist jetzt schon das vierte oder fünfte Spiel in dieser Saison, in dem wir über 30 Punkte erzielt haben und trotzdem verloren haben, weil die gesamte Verteidigung das Spiel damit verbracht hat, Däumchen zu drehen, anstatt irgendetwas Sinnvolles
zu tun. Es passiert immer wieder, mir fehlen die Worte, ich habe das alles schon seit Wochen über das Team gesagt. Ich wiederhole mich, es ist einfach nur Mist. Es wird nichts unternommen, um irgendetwas zu ändern, der Trainerstab ist absolut unfähig, dass sie das so weiterlaufen lassen. Zum Teufel mit allem.
23. | (/MIN) | Vikings | +3 | 5-8 | The 31-0 shutout was the product of wire-to-wire dominance, though maybe not in the ways you'd expect. The Commanders ran the ball well and sustained some long drives against Flores' defense, but three turnovers (including a foolish bubble screen to Gink's side) left them scoreless. Meanwhile, the Vikings offense was all singles and doubles, thanks to consistent (if not explosive) running and a refreshingly decisive and pinpoint-accurate JJ McCarthy. Sure, the Commanders are struggling, but shutouts in the NFL are really hard to come by, and the 31 points here understates just how effective the Vikings' offense was -- excluding kneeldowns, the Vikings only had six drives. They scored on five of them, including four touchdowns. A playoff run is probably out of the cards, but if McCarthy and the squad can keep this up, you can flip the long-term script from a rudderless team scrambling for a new QB into a up-and-coming young team with a chance to maybe develop into something special.
24. | (/ATL) | Falcons | -1 | 4-9 | 6-6 at half. Atlanta's defense kept the Seahawks offense in check, Darnold was intercepted off a team effort, James Pearce had his 5th sack in five straight games (rookie record from 2021 Parsons). 6-6 at half. In the second half the Seahawks put up more points (31) than Falcons receivers had yards (24). Atlanta then gives up the NFL's first 100-yard play of the season in 12 seconds, followed by a fumble and followed up the fumble with an interception. Through 13 games this season, the Falcons have scored 19 points on their 16 turnovers. Atlanta went 1-13 on 3rd down, surprisingly not the worst percentage they've had in a game this season. That's true consistency superseding any single player, but Raheem Morris spent his energy in the post-game press conference blaming the players for not executing his grand vision. Given the investment and hype, the 2025 season be more disappointing than Bobby Petrino. If Raheem left resignation letters in the players lockers they'd probably celebrate.
25. | (/ARI) | Cardinals | -1 | 3-10 | I don’t have much to say about this Cardinals team, other than you can bet on them losing lots of games and missing the playoffs every season. The Cardinals may currently be the worst team in the NFL. Unfortunately, they aren’t even good at being bad, as they somehow still sit with the 8th pick in the draft after the Browns performed a tanking masterclass. I think this team can very well lose the rest of its games, and it’ll still probably only end up picking around number 5. If they’re not in love with a QB, it would likely be an OT at that pick, running it back with Jacoby Brissett or another tank commander, and gunning for a QB in 2027.
26. | (/NO) | Saints | +4 | 3-10 | Every single NFC South fan knew this result was coming. The Saints were the worst team in the division and the Bucs were making a playoff push. There was absolutely no way the team which should win was going to. Don't interrogate the fact the highest yardage by a Saints receiver was 40, or that neither QB threw for 150 yards. Just enjoy a classic rinky dink, upside down, multiverse of madness NFC South game.
27. | (/WAS) | Commanders | -2 | 3-10 | The Vikings were shut out last week - that's how bad the Vikings are this year. This week, the Vikings shut out the Commanders. That's how bad the Commanders are this year. There may not be a worse football team in the league right now. What an absolute head spinning result - from the top 4 last season, to bottom 4, if not the very bottom, in less than 12 months. You would think after a Championship game appearance,
everyone should be safe for at least 2 seasons, but a result this pathetic is enough that everyone should be getting nervous and getting sweaty in their seats. The result is just historically bad; not just one of those one-off bad seasons an otherwise good team has.. this is a full-blown, unmitigated disaster. Losing 8 games in a row in the modern NFL is hard to do. Losing 5 of those 8 by 21+ points is almost unheard of. It's just.. so. bad.The Vikings showed up with the 31st-ranked 3rd down offense - they punted one time on Sunday. This week starts the first of a 4 game stretch against division opponents, as the Commanders and Giants are going to meet up and see which of the two is destined for a bottom rung spot. Following that, Washington gets the Eagles twice and Dallas once; not hard to imagine this 8 game losing streak ends up at 12.
28. | (/NYG) | Giants | +1 | 2-11 | Big Blue didn't have any major accidents, Abdul Carter missed meetings or boat trips during the bye week, so Giants fans will take the small wins where they can get them. Another win is not subjecting Giants fans to watching their own team's defense on television. Thanks G-Men!
29. | (/NYJ) | Jets | -1 | 3-10 | If Steve Wilks doesn't get fired, this isn't a serious coaching staff. The Jets are 31st in weighted defensive DVOA this season. This was a top 5 unit just two seasons ago. Yes, they've traded away a couple high end players, but this level of decline is not what you should expect from a defensive minded head coach or an experienced DC.
30. | (/CLE) | Browns | -2 | 3-10 | Maaaaaannnnnn. Well we got our starter. so there is that. the Browns will travel to Chicago next week to play in absolutely frigid temperatures and what is sure to be a run heavy game. so you know what better time to show off Sanders.
31. | (/TEN) | Titans | +1 | 2-11 | The Titans picked up their second win of the year on a snowy Sunday in Cleveland. Their game plan was clear: lean on the run and structure the passing attack to limit Myles Garrett’s impact. Tony Pollard delivered his best performance of the season, as the offense rushed for 184 yards and allowed only one sack. The defense had an up and down day, giving up four touchdowns but forcing two turnovers and securing the victory with a pair of late stops on two-point conversion attempts.
32. | (/LV) | Raiders | -1 | 2-11 | Sometimes you win by losing and that's exactly what we did this week. An elite Bronco's D ate our offense alive but thankfully Pete made a great call to kick that field goal at the end (Go choke on a pizza Dave). Hope Geno recovers soon and can get back to his job of tank commander.

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[Schefter] Two-minute warning: The NFL notified teams today that it will shorten the time between picks in the first round of the draft from 10 to 8 minutes starting with the 2026 draft in Pittsburgh.
https://www.espn.com/contributor/adam-schefter/e180fe6d5c9a4

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Sounds like Philip Rivers is tracking to start Sunday at Seattle:

Two days in now, and my time in the building this week has left me only MORE convinced Philip Rivers is this week's starting quarterback.

It isn't difficult to tell who a team is prepping to start. That player is Rivers. Period.
Per Adam Schefter

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Game Thread: Atlanta Falcons (4-9) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (7-6)

#Atlanta Falcons at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

[ESPN Gamecast](https://www.espn.com/nfl/game/_/gameId/401772948/falcons-buccaneers)

Raymond James Stadium- Tampa, FL

Network(s): Prime Video [(All prime games are also streamed on twitch for free)](https://www.twitch.tv/primevideo)

***

|Time Clock|
|:--:|
|6:29 - 2nd|

**Scoreboard**

||Q1|Q2|Q3|Q4|Total|
|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|
|ATL|0|7|--|--|7|
|TB|7|0|--|--|7|


**Scoring Plays**

| Team | Quarter | Type | Description |
|:--|:--|:--|:--|
| TB | 1 | TD | Sean Tucker 1 Yd Rush (Chase McLaughlin Kick) |
| ATL | 2 | TD | Kyle Pitts Sr. 8 Yd pass from Kirk Cousins (Zane Gonzalez Kick) |




**Passing Leaders**

|Team|Player|C/ATT|YDS|TD|INT|SACKS|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Kirk Cousins | 9/13 | 94 | 1 | 0 | 0-0 |
| TB | Baker Mayfield | 4/11 | 65 | 0 | 0 | 1-5 |

**Rushing Leaders**

|Team|Player|CAR|YDS|AVG|TD|LONG|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Bijan Robinson | 9 | 60 | 6.7 | 0 | 13 |
| TB | Bucky Irving | 6 | 24 | 4.0 | 0 | 11 |

**Receiving Leaders**

|Team|Player|REC|YDS|AVG|TD|LONG|TGTS|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Kyle Pitts Sr. | 4 | 58 | 14.5 | 1 | 26 | 4 |
| TB | Emeka Egbuka | 1 | 23 | 23.0 | 0 | 23 | 3 |


***

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Post Game Thread: Atlanta Falcons at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

#Atlanta Falcons at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

[ESPN Gamecast](https://www.espn.com/nfl/game/_/gameId/401772948/falcons-buccaneers)

Raymond James Stadium- Tampa, FL

Network(s): Prime Video [(All prime games are also streamed on twitch for free)](https://www.twitch.tv/primevideo)

***

|Time Clock|
|:--:|
|Final|

**Scoreboard**

||Q1|Q2|Q3|Q4|Total|
|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|:--:|
|ATL|0|14|0|15|29|
|TB|7|6|7|8|28|


**Scoring Plays**

| Team | Quarter | Type | Description |
|:--|:--|:--|:--|
| TB | 1 | TD | Sean Tucker 1 Yd Rush (Chase McLaughlin Kick) |
| ATL | 2 | TD | Kyle Pitts Sr. 8 Yd pass from Kirk Cousins (Zane Gonzalez Kick) |
| TB | 2 | FG | Chase McLaughlin 49 Yd Field Goal |
| ATL | 2 | TD | Kyle Pitts Sr. 17 Yd pass from Kirk Cousins (Zane Gonzalez Kick) |
| TB | 2 | FG | Chase McLaughlin 52 Yd Field Goal |
| TB | 3 | TD | Devin Culp 6 Yd pass from Baker Mayfield (Chase McLaughlin Kick) |
| TB | 4 | TD | Chris Godwin Jr. 3 Yd pass from Baker Mayfield (Baker Mayfield Pass to Chris Godwin Jr. for Two-Point Conversion) |
| ATL | 4 | TD | Bijan Robinson 6 Yd Rush (Two-Point Pass Conversion Failed) |
| ATL | 4 | TD | Kyle Pitts Sr. 7 Yd pass from Kirk Cousins (Two-Point Pass Conversion Failed) |
| ATL | 4 | FG | Zane Gonzalez 43 Yd Field Goal |




**Passing Leaders**

|Team|Player|C/ATT|YDS|TD|INT|SACKS|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Kirk Cousins | 30/44 | 373 | 3 | 0 | 1-8 |
| TB | Baker Mayfield | 19/34 | 277 | 2 | 1 | 5-27 |

**Rushing Leaders**

|Team|Player|CAR|YDS|AVG|TD|LONG|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Bijan Robinson | 19 | 93 | 4.9 | 1 | 14 |
| TB | Bucky Irving | 16 | 60 | 3.8 | 0 | 16 |

**Receiving Leaders**

|Team|Player|REC|YDS|AVG|TD|LONG|TGTS|
|:--|:--|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|--:|
| ATL | Kyle Pitts Sr. | 11 | 166 | 15.1 | 3 | 36 | 12 |
| TB | Mike Evans | 6 | 132 | 22.0 | 0 | 45 | 12 |


***

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Panthers now lead the NFC South as the Bucs have lost 5 of their last 6 games.

Last time the Panthers made the playoffs was back in 2017. Time flies.

They will face the slumping Bucs twice in these last 4 games.

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[Schefter] Steelers standout TJ Watt underwent surgery Thursday to repair a partially collapsed lung suffered Wednesday, as @JJWatt reported. TJ Watt is expected to be discharged from the hospital today but he is unlikely to play Monday night versus the Dolphins.
https://www.espn.com/contributor/adam-schefter/9cc1549bd33bd

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