Muslim Children Tips
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"A woman should train her children properly, for her children represent the men and women of the future."

Shaykh Saalih ibn Uthaymeen (rahimahullaah)
from The Uprightness of a Woman.
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Do not give a child everything he wants, lest he grows up spoilt, with an entitlement mentality.

Do not deny a child everything he asks, lest he grows up feeling miserable.

If a child gets everything he wants, he'd feel entitled to own whatever he wants even if it means oppressing someone or killing people to get that thing by force

If a child gets denied everything, he'd grow up feeling hopeless, lost, vulnerable, and gives up easily on everything, even on his own life.

Take the middle cause, give a child what he wants sometimes and deny them some other time even if you can afford it. So he'd know that everything isn't meant for him alone, and he can't always get what he wants, his wishes won't be people's command, and other people matter as much as he does, because the world doesn't revolve around him alone !!

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Raising boys is difficult, and raising girls is even more delicate.

So be patient with the difficulty, and pay attention to what is even more delicate.

Someone asked:
โ€œHow do I raise them? Trials are many, and corruption is easier than ever.โ€

The reply is:
Begin by rectifying yourself before trying to correct them. Strive to be an example of goodness in front of your children.

Perfect your prayer. Guard your tongue from careless speech. And be mindful that Allah is always watching you.

Know that goodness leaves an impact, and love for righteousness spreads through actions before words.

Children are deeply affected by what they see from their parents. Your actions raise them before your advice does.

The companions ุฑุถูŠ ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุนู†ู‡ู… spoke little but acted greatly, so their children learned more from their character than from long lectures.

If parents truly realized the immense reward and responsibility connected to raising children, they would endure every hardship with patience.

For a shadow can never become straight while the stick itself remains crooked.
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Beware of Istidraaj: When Delayed Punishment Becomes a Trial

ุจุณู€ู€ู€ู… ุงู„ู„ู€ู€ู‡ ุงู„ุฑุญู€ู€ู…ู€ู€ู† ุงู„ู€ุฑุญู€ู€ู€ูŠู€ู€ู…

Brothers, beware of istidraaj โ€” when Allaah allows a sinner to continue enjoying ease, success, status, and concealment while steadily increasing him in sin until destruction overtakes him unexpectedly.

Look at Firโ€˜awn. He was granted kingdom, power, authority, wealth, and influence until his very last moments. Yet he oppressed his wife, slaughtered innocent boys, humiliated women, enslaved a nation, and โ€” greater than all of that โ€” arrogantly rejected the clear signs brought by the Messenger of Allaah.

His worldly success was not honour. It was a rope being extended.

So do not be deceived when Allaah conceals your sins. Do not imagine that because punishment has not yet arrived, you are safe. A man may oppress his wife, betray trusts, nurture hidden hypocrisy, persist upon secret kufr, mock the limits of Allaah in private, and still wake up every day with provision, health, and reputation. That concealment is not always mercy. Sometimes it is a test. Sometimes it is abandonment.

Do not think you can spend the beginning of your life playing games with your Lord, then conveniently repent at the end when your desires weaken and death approaches. Allaah is not unjust, and evil plots only encircle its planner.

Even the grandfather of the Prophet ๏ทบ spent years protecting and supporting his grandson, defending him against harm and standing beside him in difficult times, yet he did not die upon Islaam. Good deeds alone do not guarantee a good ending. Nearness to righteousness is not righteousness itself. Lineage, service, intelligence, activism, reputation, or sacrifice cannot save a person if sincerity and submission to Allaah are absent.

So be humble.

Rush toward tawbah before the door closes. Increase in righteousness while you still possess strength. And constantly beg Allaah for steadfastness, because the greatest karฤmah is not wealth, influence, intelligence, or admiration from people โ€” it is to die upon guidance and sincerity.

A beautiful ending is not owed to anyone. It is granted by Allaah alone - And Allaah is not unjust!

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Subhaan Allah how the Salaf honoured their mothers may Allah ุณูุจู’ุญูŽุงู†ูŽู‡ู ูˆูŽุชูŽุนูŽุงู„ูŽู‰‎ guide us to honour our parents
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YOU, YOUR WEALTH BELONGS TO YOUR FATHER"

It was narrated from Jabir bin 'Abdullah (radiAllahuanhu) that a man said: "O Messenger of Allah, I have wealth and a son, and my father wants to take all my wealth." He said: "You and your wealth belongs to your father." [Sunan Ibn Majah 2291 & Musnad Ahฬฃmad].

‎ุญูŽุฏู‘ูŽุซูŽู†ูŽุง ู‡ูุดูŽุงู…ู ุจู’ู†ู ุนูŽู…ู‘ูŽุงุฑูุŒ ุญูŽุฏู‘ูŽุซูŽู†ูŽุง ุนููŠุณูŽู‰ ุจู’ู†ู ูŠููˆู†ูุณูŽุŒ ุญูŽุฏู‘ูŽุซูŽู†ูŽุง ูŠููˆุณููู ุจู’ู†ู ุฅูุณู’ุญูŽุงู‚ูŽุŒ ุนูŽู†ู’ ู…ูุญูŽู…ู‘ูŽุฏู ุจู’ู†ู ุงู„ู’ู…ูู†ู’ูƒูŽุฏูุฑูุŒ ุนูŽู†ู’ ุฌูŽุงุจูุฑู ุจู’ู†ู ุนูŽุจู’ุฏู ุงู„ู„ู‘ูŽู‡ูุŒ ุฃูŽู†ู‘ูŽ ุฑูŽุฌูู„ุงู‹ุŒ ู‚ูŽุงู„ูŽ ูŠูŽุง ุฑูŽุณููˆู„ูŽ ุงู„ู„ู‘ูŽู‡ู ุฅูู†ู‘ูŽ ู„ููŠ ู…ูŽุงู„ุงู‹ ูˆูŽูˆูŽู„ูŽุฏู‹ุง ูˆูŽุฅูู†ู‘ูŽ ุฃูŽุจููŠ ูŠูุฑููŠุฏู ุฃูŽู†ู’ ูŠูŽุฌู’ุชูŽุงุญูŽ ู…ูŽุงู„ููŠ ููŽู‚ูŽุงู„ูŽ ‏ "‏ ุฃูŽู†ู’ุชูŽ ูˆูŽู…ูŽุงู„ููƒูŽ ู„ุฃูŽุจููŠูƒูŽ ‏"‏ ‏.‏

Commentary:

A man came to the Prophet and said, โ€˜O Messenger of Allฤh ๏ทบ , my father wants to take my wealth.โ€™ The Prophet ๏ทบ replied, โ€˜you and your wealth are for your fatherโ€™.

There are 5 conditions which permits a father utilising some of the wealth of his son:

1. He has a need to utilise some of the wealth, and only takes according to his need.There should be no harm upon the son.

2. The wealth should be surplus to the needs of the son. For example, if the son requires his car to earn a living and going to work, it is not permitted for the father cannot take it for himself.

3. The father taking the wealth does not prevent the son fulfilling rights of others, such as spending upon his mother, or maintaining his wife and children.

4. The father is not being wasteful with the money, or comitting harฤm such as gambling.

5. The father cannot take wealth off one son, in order to give it to another son/child, as this is favouritism between children and oppression.

This แธคadฤซth also shows the immense right of parents over their children, and that these rights do not cease as soon as a child leaves their parental home or becomes independant.

The correct meaning of this แธคadฤซth is that โ€˜โ€ฆyour wealth [can be utilised] by your fatherโ€™ and not โ€˜โ€ฆ[belong] to your fatherโ€™. [Refer to Nayl al-Awtฤr by ash-Shawkฤni Vol. 6 P. 17]

This แธคadฤซth does not give the father complete ownership of the sonโ€™s wealth, rather it permits him to take some of it for a need. The son must still give its Zakฤh, as well as it being his inheritance for others.

Related ฤ€yฤt:

{Worship Allฤh, associate nothing with Him, and be good to your parents} [Al Qurสพฤn 4:36]

{Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and be good to your parents} [Al Qurสพฤn 17:23]

{And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, โ€œMy Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.โ€} [Al Qurสพฤn 17:24]

Related narrations:

The Prophet ๏ทบ said, โ€˜The father is the middle of the gates of Paradise, so keep to this gate or lose it.โ€™ [At-Tirmidhฤซ]

A man came to the Prophet ๏ทบ asking permission to wage jihad. The Prophet ๏ทบ said, โ€˜are your parents alive?โ€™ The man replied, โ€˜yesโ€™. The Prophet ๏ทบ said, โ€˜Then strive in the service of them both.โ€™ [Al-Bukhaฬ„riฬ„ & Muslim].
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Fighting is common in preschool because young children are still learning to share, take turns, communicate, and regulate their emotions. The goal isn't just to stop the fightโ€”it's to teach the skills that prevent future conflicts.

Here are some effective strategies:

* Stay calm and intervene immediately. Separate the children if needed and ensure everyone is safe.
* Acknowledge feelings. "I can see you're both upset."
* Find out what happened without assigning blame. Listen to each child briefly.
* Teach simple words they can use instead of hitting, such as "Can I have a turn?" or "I'm still using it."
* Help them solve the problem together. Offer choices: take turns, use a timer, find another toy, or play together.
* Praise positive behaviour. Notice when children share, use kind words, or solve problems peacefully.
* Look for patterns. Ask yourself:

* Does fighting happen over the same toys?
* Is it during transitions?
* Are the children tired, hungry, or overstimulated?
* Adjust the environment. Provide duplicate popular toys, create enough play space, and establish predictable routines.
* Teach social-emotional skills daily through stories, role-play, games, and modeling kind behaviour.

Remember, challenging behaviour is often a form of communication. Instead of asking, "How do I stop this behaviour?" ask, "What skill is this child missing, and how can I teach it?"

For preschoolers, every conflict is a learning opportunity. With consistent guidance, patience, and positive modeling, they gradually learn to manage disagreements, express their feelings appropriately, and build healthy relationships.
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Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah (d. 751 AH) said: "Daughters are not a burden. Rather, they are a test of mercy, and whoever is merciful to them will receive mercy from Allah. Islam elevated their status, while ignorance buried them."

Alhamdulillฤh, today, 3rd of July at 4:48 am, on 7th of Muharram, 1447 AH, Allah ๏ทป has once again blessed me with a beautiful daughter.

Imam Ahmad would congratulate the one having a daughter by saying: "Congratulations, for the Prophets were mostly fathers of daughters."

They say that sons carry the name of their father, but what they don't tell you is that it's the daughters who carry their fathers. A father may hold his daughter's hands for a short while, but carries her in his heart forever.

The Prophet ๏ทบ said: โ€œDo not dislike daughters. They are comforting and precious.โ€ - (Musnad Ahmad 2114 โ€“ Graded Hasan by scholars like al-Albani)

May Allah ๏ทป make us amongst the righteous and allow us to raise our children upon the Pleasure of Allah and nurture them upon good manners. May we be grateful to Him for this beautiful gift and allow our children to be righteous and come to maturity. May He allow us to make this world a better place for them. May He ๏ทป allow us to be a good example for them, and may He protect them from all kinds of evil.

Ameen.

#blessing #daughters
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Muslim Children Tips
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๐Ÿง  Research shows constant criticism rewires a childโ€™s brain.

And the emotional stress shapes lifelong mental health.

Children raised in environments filled with constant criticism often develop a stress-response system that remains on high alert, even in the absence of actual threats.

This chronic activation of the fight-or-flight state interferes with a childโ€™s ability to feel safe, calm, or emotionally grounded.

According to research from the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University, persistent emotional stress in early life can alter brain architecture, leading to long-term issues with emotional regulation, anxiety, and attention. When everyday interactions are perceived as threatening, children may respond with hypervigilance, withdrawal, or emotional shutdownโ€”defense mechanisms rooted in survival.

As these children grow, the expectation of judgment or harm becomes deeply ingrained in their nervous system, affecting their self-esteem and relationships. They may struggle to trust others or feel secure in social settings, constantly anticipating criticism or rejection. This state of chronic stress is known as "toxic stress," and itโ€™s been linked to a range of lifelong impactsโ€”from depression and learning difficulties to physical health problems. The findings underscore how emotionally unsafe environments can have a lasting effect on a childโ€™s development, both psychologically and biologically.

Source:
The Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University. InBrief: The Impact of Early Adversity on Children's Development.
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Indian parents love their kids like any other parent, but also construct their entire lives around their children. Their only identity becomes โ€œsomeoneโ€™s fatherโ€ or โ€œsomeoneโ€™s motherโ€.

Consequently, they take everything from report card to marriage as a personal achievement or failure. Their self image is a soulless monument built around their kids lives.

This is tragic - the children sometimes compete with their parents to live their own life. It leads to double lives and resentment.

Itโ€™s high time Indian parents got a life of their own.
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imฤm ibn bฤz said:

being good to your parents is from the reasons of Allฤh relieving you of distress, and easing your affairs.

- nลซr สฟalฤ al-darb 2/122
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Imaam Ibn al-Jawzi quoted Mujahid as saying:

ู„ุง ูŠู†ุจุบูŠ ู„ู„ูˆู„ุฏ ุฃู† ูŠุฏูุน ูŠุฏ ูˆุงู„ุฏู‡ ุฅุฐุง ุถุฑุจู‡ุŒ ูˆู…ู† ุดุฏ ุงู„ู†ุธุฑ ุฅู„ู‰ ูˆุงู„ุฏูŠู‡ ู„ู… ูŠุจุฑู‡ู…ุงุŒ ูˆู…ู† ุฃุฏุฎู„ ุนู„ูŠู‡ู…ุง ู…ุง ูŠุญุฒู†ู‡ู…ุง ูู‚ุฏ ุนู‚ู‡ู…ุง
"๐—” ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—ป ๐˜€๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ฑ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฝ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ต ๐—ฎ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ต๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐—ณ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ'๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ณ ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ถ๐—บ. ๐‘Šโ„Ž๐‘œ๐‘’๐‘ฃ๐‘’๐‘Ÿ ๐‘™๐‘œ๐‘œ๐‘˜๐‘  โ„Ž๐‘Ž๐‘Ÿ๐‘ โ„Ž๐‘™๐‘ฆ ๐‘Ž๐‘ก โ„Ž๐‘–๐‘  ๐‘๐‘Ž๐‘Ÿ๐‘’๐‘›๐‘ก๐‘  โ„Ž๐‘Ž๐‘  ๐‘›๐‘œ๐‘ก ๐‘๐‘’๐‘’๐‘› ๐‘‘๐‘ข๐‘ก๐‘–๐‘“๐‘ข๐‘™ ๐‘ก๐‘œ ๐‘กโ„Ž๐‘’๐‘š. ๐ด๐‘›๐‘‘ ๐‘คโ„Ž๐‘œ๐‘’๐‘ฃ๐‘’๐‘Ÿ ๐‘๐‘Ž๐‘ข๐‘ ๐‘’๐‘  ๐‘กโ„Ž๐‘’๐‘š ๐‘”๐‘Ÿ๐‘–๐‘’๐‘“ โ„Ž๐‘Ž๐‘  ๐‘–๐‘›๐‘‘๐‘’๐‘’๐‘‘ ๐‘‘๐‘–๐‘ ๐‘œ๐‘๐‘’๐‘ฆ๐‘’๐‘‘ ๐‘กโ„Ž๐‘’๐‘š."

('Birr al-Walidayn', p. 8 ).

This is not to endorse this opinion, or to justify violence, but to show to what extent some scholars went, emphasizing the importance of being good to our parents.

We owe them our existence, after God.

Some people have bad and abusive parents, this is their test.

Don't tolerate abuse, but repel it with respect and kindness - after all, they are our parents.
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Allah's Messenger (๏ทบ) said:

"Do not let your animals and children go out when the sun sets until the first and the darkest part of the night is over, for the Satan is let loose with the sinking of the sun until the darkest part of the night is over."

๐Ÿ“š Sahih Muslim 2013
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DEAR PARENTS IN ISLAM !!

If You can take your children for Shopping, Then why can't you take them to nearby Masjid.?

If you can wake them Up for a long journey, Then why can't you wake them up for Fajar?

If you can buy them stories and comics, Why can't you buy them translated Quran and hadith books?

If you can send them to high class tuitions, then why can't you send them to nearby Madrasa?

If you have time to watch movies with them, then why don't you have a bit time to spend with them for Islamic lecturers?

Dear Parents, please let us all reconnect with the Deen.!
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"Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands."
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Raise your children correctly
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Things They Donโ€™t Teach You in School:

1. Money Management: Understanding how to save, invest, and manage debt is important but not often taught in school.

2. Emotional Intelligence: Learning how to handle your emotions and understand othersโ€™ feelings helps in life, but itโ€™s not something you learn in class.

3. Building Connections: Making friends and networking can open doors for you in life, but schools donโ€™t always teach you how to do it effectively.

4. Thinking Critically: School teaches facts, but it doesnโ€™t always teach how to solve problems or think in creative ways.

5. Managing Time: Learning how to organize your tasks and make the most of your time is crucial, but itโ€™s something you mostly figure out on your own.

6. Negotiation: Whether itโ€™s asking for a raise or solving a disagreement, learning how to negotiate is important but not usually covered in school.

7. Staying Motivated: School doesnโ€™t always teach how to stay focused on your goals when things get tough. You learn this through experience.

8. Handling Failure: You wonโ€™t always succeed, and learning to bounce back from failure is one of lifeโ€™s most important lessons, but itโ€™s not in textbooks.

9. Mental Health: Understanding how to take care of your mental well-being, deal with stress, and stay calm is something that should be taught but often isnโ€™t.

10. Selling and Persuading: Whether convincing someone of your idea or selling yourself in an interview, knowing how to persuade others is key, yet school doesnโ€™t always teach this.

11. Branding Yourself: How you present yourself to the world, especially online, can affect your opportunities, but school rarely covers this.

12. Healthy Relationships: Knowing how to build and maintain good relationships is essential, but it's not something they typically teach in school.

These skills are often more important in the real world than what we learn in textbooks. While school provides us with foundational knowledge, itโ€™s the practical lessons about managing emotions, relationships, finances, and personal growth that truly shape our success.

Life doesnโ€™t come with a textbook, and these essential skills are learned through experience, practice, and sometimes even failure. Itโ€™s up to us to seek out opportunities to learn these valuable life lessons, as theyโ€™re not always given to us in the classroom.

#SkillsForLife #school #fblifestyle
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Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah (d. 751 AH) said: "Daughters are not a burden. Rather, they are a test of mercy, and whoever is merciful to them will receive mercy from Allah. Islam elevated their status, while ignorance buried them."

Alhamdulillฤh, today, 3rd of July at 4:48 am, on 7th of Muharram, 1447 AH, Allah ๏ทป has once again blessed me with a beautiful daughter.

Imam Ahmad would congratulate the one having a daughter by saying: "Congratulations, for the Prophets were mostly fathers of daughters."

They say that sons carry the name of their father, but what they don't tell you is that it's the daughters who carry their fathers. A father may hold his daughter's hands for a short while, but carries her in his heart forever.

The Prophet ๏ทบ said: โ€œDo not dislike daughters. They are comforting and precious.โ€ - (Musnad Ahmad 2114 โ€“ Graded Hasan by scholars like al-Albani)

May Allah ๏ทป make us amongst the righteous and allow us to raise our children upon the Pleasure of Allah and nurture them upon good manners. May we be grateful to Him for this beautiful gift and allow our children to be righteous and come to maturity. May He allow us to make this world a better place for them. May He ๏ทป allow us to be a good example for them, and may He protect them from all kinds of evil.

Ameen.

#blessing #daughters
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Muโ€™adh ibn Anas reported,
The Prophet ๏ทบ said,

ู…ูŽู†ู’ ุจูŽุฑู‘ูŽ ูˆูŽุงู„ูุฏูŽูŠู’ู‡ู ุทููˆุจูŽู‰ ู„ูŽู‡ู ุฒูŽุงุฏูŽ ุงู„ู„ู‘ูŽู‡ู ุนูŽุฒู‘ูŽ ูˆูŽุฌูŽู„ู‘ูŽ ูููŠ ุนูู…ู’ุฑูู‡ู.

โ€œBlessed is one who is good to his parents. Allah Almighty will extend his lifespan.โ€

Grade: Sahih (Al-Suyuti)

[Al-Adab al-Mufrad lil-Bukhari, 22]
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Forwarded from Muslim Marriage Tips
Prevent them from committing zina and falling into sin by getting them married when they attain puberty; the parents who fail in doing so will share the punishment with them.

Umar ibn al-Khattab ู‡ู†ุน ู‡ู„ู„ุง ูŠุถุฑ said:

"Marry off your children when they reach puberty,
and do not carry their sins."

ุขูค.ูก ุต ุŒูŠุฒูˆุฌู„ุง ู†ุจุงู„ ุกุงุณู†ู„ุง ู…ุงูƒุญุฃุฑ
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