Nationalism Is Back.
But nobody knows what it means. Among the many isms formed in the crucible of the French Revolution, nationalism
proved to have greatest lasting power.
https://t.me/MkNotes/715

monk = a religious man who spends much time praying and thinking about religion.

monastery = a place where monks live.

a vow of silence = a promise not to speak

A man wanted to become a monk so he went to the monastery and talked to the head monk. The head monk said, "You must take a vow of silence and can only say two words every three years." The man agreed and after the first 3 years, the head monk came to him and said, "What are your two words?" "Food cold!" the man replied. Three more years went by and the head monk came to him and said "What are your two words?" "Robe dirty!" the man exclaimed. Three more years went by and the head monk came to him and said, "What are your two words?" "I quit!" said the man. "Well," the head monk replied, "I am not surprised. You have done nothing but complain ever since you got here!"
https://t.me/MkNotes/717

Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."

Write On...
Put Your Mind into Writing...
Give your comments on the passages in ILI Advanced Books.
E.g. questions, ideas, further reading, links, disagreements, and so on.
You may also comment on the topics which were discussed in class.

Here are the original sources of some of the passages:
http://adrd123.blogspot.com/

A traveling salesman rings this doorbell.
10 year old little Johnny opens the door, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar.
The salesman says, "Little boy is your mother home?"
Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, "What do you think?"
https://t.me/MkNotes/721

How Sophia the robot copies human facial expressions - CNN Style
https://www.cnn.com/style/article/sophia-robot-artificial-intelligence-smart-creativity/index.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+rss%2Fedition_world+%28RSS%3A+CNNi+-+World%29

Maz Jobrani: humanizing immigrants through comedy - CNN
https://edition-m.cnn.com/2018/11/13/middleeast/maz-jobrani-immigration-and-comedy/index.html

Rape
Herblock, Washington Post, 1984
https://t.me/MkNotes/724

Man O Man
When without money, eats wild vegetables at home
When has money, eats same wild vegetables in fine restaurant.

When without money, rides bicycle;
When has money, rides exercise machine.

When without money, walks to earn food
When has money, walks to lose the fat

Man O Man! never fails to deceive thyself!

When without money, wishes to get married;
When has money, wishes to get divorced.

When without money, wife becomes secretary;
When has money, secretary becomes wife.

When without money, acts like rich man;
When has money, acts like poor man.

Man, O Man, never can tell the simple truth!

Says share market is bad but keeps speculating;
Says money is evil but keeps accumulating.
Says high positions are lonely but keeps wanting them.

Man O Man ! Never means what he says and never says what he means!

https://t.me/MkNotes/725

Moods of a Woman:
An angel of truth and a dream of fiction,
a woman is a bundle of contradiction,
she's afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,
but will tackle her boyfriend alone in the house.
Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose,
she'll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose,
she'll win you in rage, enchant you in silk,
she'll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk,
at times she'll be vengeful, merry and sad,
she'll hate you like poison, and love you like mad.

Moods of a Man: Horny Hungry Thirsty Sleepy
https://t.me/MkNotes/726

Smoking Pot
https://t.me/MkNotes/727

Travel Risk Map 2019: Iran as safe as the UK and Slovenia, Denmark and Switzerland among world's least dangerous countries | The Independent
https://www.independent.co.uk/travel/news-and-advice/travel-risk-map-2019-worlds-safest-dangerous-countries-to-visit-iran-uk-slovenia-denmark-a8644646.html?utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&fbclid=IwAR2vodTeSHQOFnO6tto82I6jokWfchgYRX-B4s7ysrPqAMEDWlJ1uzoFB5s#Echobox=1542835064

A man and his wife were sitting at a table at her high school Reunion, and the wife kept staring at a drunken man swigging his Drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
The man asked the wife, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed,
"He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he Hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" the man said, "Who would think a person could go on Celebrating that long?"

https://t.me/MkNotes/730

When the English settlers landed in Australia, they noticed a strange animal that jumped extremely high and far. They asked the aboriginal people using body language and signs trying to ask them about this animal. They responded with “Kan Ghu Ru” the English then adopted the word kangaroo. What the aboriginal people were really trying to say was: “we don’t understand you”, “ Kan Ghu Ru”.

https://t.me/MkNotes/735

A statue in a park with a soldier on a horse with its 2 feet in the air
means the soldier died in combat.
If the horse has only 1 foot in the air, the soldier died of injuries from combat.
If the horse has all 4 feet on the ground, the soldier died of natural causes.
https://t.me/MkNotes/737

Two weeks ago was my 44th birthday and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning. I went down to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday" and probably have a present for me. She didn't even say "Good Morning", let alone any "Happy Birthday." I thought, "Well, that's wives for you. The children will remember. "The children came down to breakfast and didn't say a word.

When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet said, "Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday." I felt a little better. Someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know it is such a beautiful day outside and it is your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go.

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go. We went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it is such a beautiful day, we don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable. Sure," I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends. They were all singing Happy Birthday.......and there I sat on the couch.......naked

https://t.me/MkNotes/738