HUMAN CONFIRMATION BIAS

A person will ONLY be able to view life through the narrow LENS of what they believe is true about the world

Humans are skilled at shaping the world to match their beliefs

They will go very far to make their world fit with a reality that matches their past beliefs

EVEN if that belief does not help them at all

The woman who fully believes that all men are trash will ignore thousands of good men just to find herself a bad man that matches her view, to prove herself right

The person who fully believes money is tough to get will ignore every good chance and keep living poor, to PROVE that money is rare

NO MATTER the evidence shown otherwise

Your view of the world STARTS inside.

You push your own beliefs onto the world to THEN make the world fit closely with what you think is true

And IGNORE any info that goes against those beliefs

Don't be the guy.

A lot of people out there saying someone's gotta DO SOMETHING.

About the left the right Zionists Hamas blacks whites troons Nazis etc. etc. etc.

Don't let it be you.

You are gonna live a long life.

A nice house.

A nice dog.

Not end up cold and alone in the woods on the run from big men putting knees on your neck.

With everyone who said someone's gotta do something saying you're a piece of shit cuz you did something.

Someone's gotta do something.

Never them.

So not you.

Live a long life.

"I can't get women cause I'm short and ugly..."

I want to talk about one of the most regurgitated statements that I've heard quite a ton since I started this account.

Such a statement only points to your insecurities. Giving excuses for why you can't go out there to talk to women.

Now, I'm speaking to you as someone who has been there before (making excuses for why I couldn't go talk to women)

I used to be an insecure and anxious porn addict who frequented bars at night looking for a girl to validate me while being blackout drunk.

I wasn't even chasing the sex most times, I was just looking for a girl to acknowledge me.

When my mom and dad separated, it broke me in ways I couldn't believe it would and I'm not saying to get sympathy but to show emotional bravery to being able to communicate to you as a human being.

I used to hate myself so bad that I wanted to commit suicide but now anymore cause I got my life figured out and I got the "women" side handled.

I went to the Gym and was moving through a shopping mall. I looked at the designer shops like Gucci, Tom Ford, etc and it made me realize that these were all started by one person with a delusional and irrational confidence that one day their Brand is going to be renowned around the world.

That's what it takes in life and even better applied in the sexual marketplace (SMV)

"Irrational faith and delusional optimism."

That is the key.

Most people don't even know what confidence means and like Socrates said "The beginning of wisdom is the definition of terms."

I define Confidence as optimism in the absence of certainty.

All of the things I could have used as excuses why I couldn't achieve the things I wanted, I used as motivation.

Was it the time guys told me my accent wouldn't help me get English girls?

Or was the time someone said I was ugly and I shouldn't be cold approaching girls?

Or the time someone told me that being 5"9 won't get me girls in Canada?

Or the time they said Eastern Europe girls don't like black guys?

All these were just feedback.

All I did was see it as fuel to achieve the things they said I couldn't.

Look if you're a guy and you're feeding yourself the belief that you can't get girls because you're short/bald/ugly etc and you want to play that narrative out in your mind (like Henry Ford said "whether you think you can or can't, you're right") then maybe you're right - which is giving yourself an excuse not to put yourself out there.

Most guys who give their excuses are terrified of succeeding cause then their long-held beliefs are crushed when they find out that the gorgeous girl walking down the street is happy he approached her and is attracted to him (even if he is 5"5 and 5 in looks) cause of his gravitas, audacity, leadership, etc.

These traits matter more than your looks or height

It's the unhealthy ego at work that is always trying to prove itself right (self-preservation)

A lot of guys want to use their insecurities as a comfort blanket, they just want to come to my DMs and say things like "I can't do this cause blah blah blah."

If after all the motivation, inspiration, and information I've provided in this channel over the years, you're still adamant that you can't set your dating life in order or gain a foothold in the sexual marketplace place then honestly...

FUCK YOU!

Some guys shouldn't even get a sniff in the dating market but they are crushing it despite the flaws that should be holding them back.

Why?

Cause they have irrational self-belief, and optimism in their abilities and are going out there taking action.

Everyone gets rejected and we all have a genetic baseline that we're working with but the way you win at the Game of Life isn't about complaining about the cards you have been dealt with but playing your hands to the best of your abilities.

Just cause you don't get some girls doesn't mean you can't get any and the more you level up your life, the more the internal will take care of itself.

Dude, attracting women is 90% mindset. Internal state = external reality. She's your mirror (she feels what you feel)

Let's say you're 5"5, facially you're not that great but you approached a girl and you're operating from a place of wholeness rather than from a place of lack. Say you're treating your insecurities as your blessing then you're going to do it all despite your shortcomings.

If you're 5"5 then don't do it for just you, do it for other guys who are 5"5 and don't believe it is possible.

The majority of guys will ruminate in their egoic self-absorption and say things like "If you're not 6ft tall and handsome then you should opt out of the game."

Well if that's the narrative you want to feed yourself then good luck to you. If you're adamant that you can't change then it's fine, opt out of the game and continue to play video games while wanking into a sock.

In terms of looking good, you should know there is a big difference between looking good and being good looking and it's within every man's power to improve on what he has been given.

I have time for a guy who DMs me saying "Hi, Mos love our content. Just want to say I'm feeling insecure about my height and I know it's all in my head. I would love some advice to go about this." I prefer guys like this because they see the possibility. Sure we all got something about ourselves we don't like cause there is no perfect human being.

At the same time, I'm not saying don't be insecure, just don't whine about it like a little girl.

Your mindset trumps everything you think will get you chicks.

I'm telling you what you need to know rather than what you need to hear. I do want the best for all of you that's why I'm putting passion into this writing cause I've been there and done it so you can do it yourself.

I promise you that and I don't have time for people who don't have time for themselves but if you're adamant that you can't change then there is nothing I can do for you.

You have to move first and see the possibilities.

Hope you got inspired by this post and if you want help to start then check out the pinned post on this channel and get my free ebook to start so you can implement this.

Note: I'm not saying this cause I'm an asshole but I do believe guys need some tough love at times. All you need is to get 1% better every day. Imagine your life 20 years from now and you're thinking "Fuck, I should have just taken more risks." Don't be that guy.

-MOS

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Being congruent with women is key

If you're a shy, nice guy and suddenly switch into sexual mode which is creepy

If you're a smooth, confident guy and suddenly get weak and needy which is also creepy

Women want clarity of intent, BUT they want it shown with subtlety and style

That subtlety and style being the mating dance

So if you just want to be the fun guy, don't just come out and say you want a hookup

Instead

- Style that shows sex appeal (white teeth, tattoos, jewelry, being fit, sharp haircut)

- Smirks

- Playful lines: "damn girl, I cant focus on this talk right now... that dress... damn" (said with a sexy tone and a playful smirk)

- Touch that's fun and adjusted

- Leading with certainty

That shows sexual intent without clumsiness. She feels bliss because it's clear but in a subtle, smooth way

Same rules apply if you want a relationship

A lot of relationship seeking guys think they can just come out and say they want one

And because women publicly say how much they hate guys who just want sex without effort, they think they're earning points

But they aren’t

You can’t skip the mating dance, even with girls who want relationships

Instead

- Still lead as the lover

- Compliment her on non sexual traits

- Point out your rare connection

- Future plan naturally (shared goals, things to do outside of the bedroom)

Bottom line is that women react to your intent and congruence

But only when it's done thru your behavior, vibe, and look NOT what you blurt out directly

A lot of dating tips online are more ego-based than result-based.

For example:

=> Shy and inexperienced girls don’t show much or give you much to work with. The usual online coach will say, “If she isn’t giving you much, MOVE ON!”

But shy girls need a man who can LEAD. They need a guy who can slowly build compliance from them, get them to invest, and gently guide their shy girl worlds and lead them into a real seduction.

=> Women who haven’t slept with you yet have no bond to you. They will flake on you, leave you on read, ghost you. The usual online coach will say, “If she doesn’t text back, MOVE ON!”

But a lot of texting is ‘right time, right place.’ Hit up that ghost girl later at the right time, with the right invite, and suddenly she’s coming out, then ends up in your bed.

Then after that she is deeply loyal and wouldn’t think of flaking or ghosting, because now you are NOT SOME RANDOM GUY she hasn’t been with anymore.

GAME exists to handle the many tricky spots that girls throw when you try to get with them and close them.

“If she doesn’t blah blah blah, then NEXT her and MOVE ON!” is not game when the guy is too simple about it.

You do not want to waste time chasing truly uninterested girls, or attention-seeking girls, putting energy into dead leads. So there must be some awareness of how much persistence you will use and where you stop at.

But at the same time, it is tough to go far if you never let your courtships start because you are running off every time a girl throws a hurdle up, instead of using game to seduce past the hurdle.

Seduce past the hurdle, my friend.

It will make you a much more successful lover of women.

It will push you beyond your comfort zone.

It will give you a REAL radar for which girls REALLY are lost causes vs which ones are simply hidden treasures that most men cannot see (or reach) but you, with some skill, can.

- MOS

New substack post

The redpill will teach you that showing desire is a zero sum game.

That the second you show it you have lost and the girl has gained what she truly wanted from you which is your focus and praise.

The truth is that desire is the spark of attraction, the beginning of tension.

Most men drop the ball on the idea of desire since they use it as a trade.

They NEED to get something back from their show of desire to prove it was real in the first place.

You need to get to a point where you can embody this powerful expression detached from any proceeding outcome.

Just for its own value.

That is the sole way it works.

How do you deal with the old question of "so what are you looking for?"

Do you say that you want a long term relationship right now?

Or that you’re not really after anything deep at the moment?

If you choose the first, you’ll come off like you prioritize commitment before you even know what’s really in play.

She’ll think "at what price?". What will you trade off for that commitment? Not a hot deal.

And if you just say you only want to hook up (in a nicer way of course)?

Though the plain truth may be liked and your want met, there's a good chance with a high quality girl you're not going to garner much interest.

So how about saying the real truth.

You don’t know what this might turn into.

For real.

Who can truly knows?

You may click in a way you never saw coming.

Or find out quick that you’re not truly a match.

More than all else, put first the goal of having a fun time, and leave her in a better spot than when you met if you two weren’t meant for each other in the long run.

Premeditation is not attractive.

See where things go organically.

Guide the both of you to whatever the real end of your connection is.

A short thought on the idea of "pressure".

Why do we want to lessen pressure?

And how?

You must see that at their core girls are mostly people pleasers by nature. (And really we all are just in different ways but story for another day)

They know this can be a double edge sword.

As a guard they want to be sure that if they show certain parts of who they are to you, that it has value.

You must see that the usual normie that girls face is often very insecure and not skilled.

This mostly shows up as NEEDINESS and CONTROLLING acts.

It is no shock these traits are closely linked to each other.

And living with such nonstop HIGH PRESSURE is very draining for them.

Always needing to assure, to soothe hurt, needing to stay on guard to not set off an unfair emotional burst.

It traps one of the key parts of feminine nature against them they want to please and yet this ends up feeding the very thing that kills the femininity out of them.

So when you put too much pressure on them early, they fear that this is how it’s going to be under your "lead" if they keep moving things with you so to say.

Always so heavy, always so grim, always needing to use them to make up for some deep wound.

How do you shape a vibe that lowers pressure?

I will break this into a few main points that you want to touch.

At its core this is what the PUSH in push/pull shows.

You are driving to a set place.

She can be your passenger princess if she wants to.

She can also step away if she wants to.

Either way does not shift your path.

You aim for SHARED GOOD times.

If it is not fun for both of you, what’s the use?

Don’t mix this thought with neglecting boundaries or avoiding leadership when facing rough times in a LTR which to be real sorting out the fine parts of these ideas needs its own book by now.

This is more meant for when you’re still testing each other out and she must see you’re firm and true before she can rely on you and open up to your advances.

The path to social circle pipeline is the slow reward marshmallow test of dating.

Reminded today of this story that happened a few months back.

One of my guys met this girl through IG and wanted to invite her and her friends out for a night in the city.

He asks me to join him both to help wing for him and handle the weight of the other two girls she was bringing along.

We get on really well with all 3 girls, there’s one that shows a very clear interest in me, the 2nd one I can see is open over time, but sadly the girl my guy liked did not return his interest in her.

This is where we step over hundred dollar bills to grab pennies.

His pride took a big hit at some point in the night he says to me "Welp… I’m never going to see that girl again for the rest of my life. I’m done."

Sure enough, the night ends, they part on good terms with kind of an unspoken sense that our little groups will have no reason to meet again.

Back to the mines of IG to dig up another possible vein of gold.

All when the gold is already right there in front of him under his nose.

The RIGHT play here is to friendzone these girls. Invite them out to future events with no hidden motives or romantic aim.

We already have a fairly large group and some standing in key parts of the city.

Why is this the smart play?

=> First, it keeps girls around you in your life. It doesn’t matter if they don’t like you that way, it keeps you sharp. If they’re actually fun to be with then their company is nice at face value.

=> Second: Preselection. When you’re building a stronger social circle, other girls will be drawn to you by seeing that you already brought other cute girls into your world. And if you treat your girl friends with no false fronts; they can often become the BEST wing-women you could ever get.

You’re building the skill and name of a host, which again is a very attractive spot to be in when you’re the center of the fun and send out good energy all the time.

Our fallen hero in this story keeps chasing one marshmallow at a time. When he could have many lining up in months with less pride and more long view.

This type of thought needs you to be fine with taking L’s, and at times even taking them on purpose, for gains that only show up 4 or 6 or 8 or 10 months later.

Don’t put yourself on the wrong end of this delayed gratification test!

One of the biggest rewards of learning game, and choosing a more open mindset about what you notice in the real world, is being able to REALLY hear the truth from girls once they drop their guard.

Thinking back to a convo I had just a few nights ago.

This girl had been kind of texting here and there between a few guys and was a bit annoyed with one in particular.

Her exact words were close to "I know that it's kind of toxic but I just wish that he didn’t give me a way out. Like he asked me out one time and I said that I couldn’t come and then didn’t ask me out again. I don’t want him to ask I just want him to tell me we’re going somewhere on Wednesday and I just wanna be like 'Okay!' "

Now some of that may sound a bit confusing compared to the normal advice.

Which is that you always want to leave a "way out".

Pressure kills attraction.

But the 'way out' we mean and the 'way out' she means are two different ideas that actually fit together perfectly.

Our want for her is clear.

But our need for her to say yes or return it is not.

We do want to take her out on Wednesday.

We don’t want to make it seem like "oh maybe hmm maybe Wednesday… or are you busy? if you’re busy that’s okay we can try another time. Or like we don’t have to go at all even."

If she wants to go or not is fully her choice, she can take it or leave it. But she must know exactly what it is she’s saying yes or no to.

The interest from your side has to be there and it has to be felt. If not she’ll think it’s not that you’re holding back on purpose as part of a “game” but that you don’t trust yourself to show it and just CAN’T bring it out at all.

It’s all right there in front of you if you just let your senses catch the signal.

Usual trap in text game that I have seen with some guys of late.

Putting too much thought on logistics.

Sure logistics do count but each time you start a chat again, you need to spark the vibe, pull, heat, whatever you want to name it.

Girls ride mood swings all day run by lots of drivers.

If she’s in a bad state, not tied to you, and you pop up out of the blue to ask if she’s still down for tonight with no build up then it all feels cold and too goal based.

Like now you just placed one more thing on top of her day that she must fret on.

It feels like grab and not give.

Best path is to sense where she’s at, bring your own vibe to the chat, raise things up to a warm boil, and then deal with plans when you’ve built a real high.

MASTERING COMMUNICATION IN RELATIONSHIPS

If you want to be a good leader in a relationship, you have to make your world MORE FUN than the view your girl is mostly shaped by these days (usually shaped by pop culture, parents who set a weak model, habits from old relationship etc.)

Let's break this down with an example.

Your new girl is bratty and just cannot say when she's wrong.

Big pride.

It's very easy to get stuck in a fight here.

She needs to face the truth and just say she's wrong and that you're right.

Most guys will try to talk their way into this end.

"Here's why I'm right. Here's why you're wrong."

What most guys fail to do here is take a kind of mind view. Seeing the world through her eyes.

The reason most people (not just girls) can't say they’re wrong is that they’ve been taught it's not SAFE to be wrong.

They've been taught that being wrong can come with heavy costs worse than the first act itself.

They will be scolded and maybe hurt even more. If they choose to come clean and admit then all of a sudden the price of entry just rose.

Now there are new rules on top of them saying they’re wrong.

They may be shamed or have their nose rubbed in the mess they made. The other person gloats over them at how right they were and how they can't believe how wrong she was.

What is she? A fool?

You have to build a world for you two where it's safe to say that you're wrong.

That this is a basic rule of communicating in YOUR relationship.

Rather than falling into this hole, what should you do instead?

1. Ask her to share where she's coming from.

She's going to note how you react when she does this.

Will you give in just to please her act?

Or, will you right away start judging and tearing her thought flow?

We want to find a middle ground.

We don't just sweep things under the rug by giving in to her moods. We also don't judge/attack her when she's trying to share her side.

This shows her that you keep firm boundaries AND that you truly keep open talk. It's not a trick or trap for her to open up so you can start to dunk on her.

2. Calm it down

Tell her that you get what she's saying, how you can see how she may have reached whatever thought she has.

At this point, it's not going to count that you're right on paper.

What she's going to note is that you're not weak. That you're also not mad at her. That you truly heard what she said. And that she can really talk to you.

You have to see the gap between man-to-man talk and man-to-woman talk.

As men we grade each other by our reason skill in fixing fights.

Girls grade us by how it feels having a clash with us.

Can she trust you with her soft side? Can she trust that you're strong enough to really guide her?

You will not believe how CALM it can be for a girl to at last be with a man who can talk at this level.

Every other guy she's been with has just let her get away with all since he thinks she's hot.

So she feels like she has to be in charge of all since her man is just a side driver.

Her dad may have been a tyrant who never missed a shot to keep rule in his house through acts of force, shame, and spite.

3. Sweet not sour

By this stage she's seen a few things. You are a man of rule. This is not about feeding your pride. This is about guiding both of you to a more smooth way of life.

This is strong yet not harsh.

The last 5% of this is to really stick with the rule. Praise the good you see in her.

Once she's come around, cheer this small win for your relationship.

Maybe a kiss on the head?

Maybe a short walk and small treat at the ice cream spot down the street?

Find a small act that shifts the whole idea of "fights" as you two fix issues side by side instead of it being a win-lose game.

Remember, the whole goal here is you're trying to show her that your guide is about going to HIGHER and BETTER states.

No weak point.

No pride.

No hate.

No shame.

4. Show it first

And if you want this to really last, you have to be true with yourself. Keep your own rules and values.

Say when you're wrong.

It's also a chance for you to see from her side if she shows grace and calm with your own flaws and imperfections.

If she sees you keeping your end of the deal, she is more likely to do the same.

For her, it's once more proof that this is not about your pride, that this is a vow to both yourself and her of your dream for your bond.

In short:

- hear without judgement

- stay strong in your convictions

- show her that your view of the world and relationship is safe and more fun than what she's used to

- praise and nurture the good in her

- lead by example

This is not easy in our time where the sexes are often more against each other than ever before.

But it is our task to guide into light those who have put their love and life with us.

The only path is through.

New MOS Stack

Has the path of learning about female psychology made you feel it’s HARDER to love girls than before?

Than...

Back when you were happy yet unaware?

This post gently gives some points to think about to help fix this sad end.

=> You have placed your cart before the horse. You have put knowing female psychology before having a firm hold of manhood and what role it plays.

=> Your own gloom is spilling over into how you see sex roles. You are problem based instead of being solution based.

=> You are not a integrated man. The soft parts of your own self are still unknown to you.

=> You are ghey (it’s not too late to rethink this choice).

=> Despite presumably understanding the female psyche you still view women as just maladapted men. Metaphorically the penis is “missing”. See the above point.

=> You have been hurt and won’t let it go. Familiar pain is easier to swallow than unfamiliar growth. Ironically this is the exact same dilemma most women subject to criticism of their own decision making find themselves in.

Most men who start to look deep into the mind of sex roles with a bent lens may show one or more of these signs.

Fixing one often starts a chain of fixing the rest.

No one is too far gone.

There is always a path through.