However, a true indicator of emotional health is when a person can respond to the needs of another with care and patience even while in a low emotional state or under physical distress.
#never_get_angry_again
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#never_get_angry_again
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At the heart of every habit lies a neurological loop—a cycle that consists of three core components: the cue, the routine, and the reward.
#the_power_of_habit
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#the_power_of_habit
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Imagine adding a spoon of salt to a glass of water. It’ll be undrinkable, right? But what if you add the same amount to a river? A spoonful of salt won’t change much at all.
Love is a bit like that.
If our hearts are small, the tiniest faults and failings of those around us can enrage us. If we expand our hearts, however, we become capable of treating others with compassion and empathy.
So how do you become more loving?
Love needs sustenance. It needs happiness.
That’s because love is a living thing and, like every other breathing being, it needs nourishment.
Happiness is the food of love. When you’re happy, you become capable of loving both yourself and others.
But that begs the question: What is happiness?
Zen Buddhism can provide a few insights.
Happiness can’t be attained by fulfilling superficial desires. It’s the fruit of mindfulness. Take walking. If you focus your attention on every single movement of your body and forget your eventual destination and the reason you’re trying to get there, you’ll begin to understand what happiness is.
That’s because mindfulness is about experiencing and appreciating the present moment. When we’re attentive to the present, we begin to notice how much beauty there is in the world. We can truly appreciate the joys of something as simple as a blossoming flower.
But don’t keep this to yourself! Beauty, like love and happiness, is made for sharing.
Practicing mindfulness is a great way of learning how to share these gifts with other people.
Imagine going for a walk with a friend who’s preoccupied and worried about something. You can bring happiness and love into their troubled reflections just by pointing out the things that warm your heart, whether it’s the sun or the play of clouds in the sky above you.
What do you think of when you hear the word “love”?
Many of us associate the concept with a particular kind of desirable partner – ideally a good-looking and successful one!
But that’s not true love.
To grasp this, you have to first understand the nature of love.
True love isn’t about what you stand to gain, but rather about recognizing and understanding the suffering of others. Love lets you see suffering from the perspective of another person, and that makes it easier to help them. Another way of describing this quality of true love is empathy.
It’s not hard to recognize true love when you find it. It reveals a world of beauty and feels both refreshing and solid. It gives you a sense of freedom, tranquility and joy. If you think you might be in love, ask yourself whether you’re filled with a sense of pure joyfulness. If you aren’t, chances are it’s not true love.
Joy is complemented by reverence. In many parts of Asia, there’s a custom that spouses should be treated as reverently as guests by one another. That’s an important part of maintaining a relationship, and even long-term partners should be treated with the same deep respect.
The final attribute of true love is its expansiveness. In the beginning, love is focused on a single person. But in time it grows and begins to extend outward to encompass all living things.
To recognize true love you should pay heed to its four defining traits.
These are loving-kindness, compassion, joy and equanimity.
Let’s unpack those concepts.
Loving-kindness is about using mindfulness to make others happy. Put differently, it’s our ability to make the sun shine in even the most overcast heart.
Compassion lets us see the suffering of others and identify ourselves with their plight. Once we’re attuned to their suffering, we become empathetic – we are able to see truly and listen deeply.
Joy is lasting and deep happiness. To bring joy to others is a great gift.
The final trait is equanimity. This can also be called inclusiveness. It’s the ability to dissolve the boundaries between yourself and another person so that their suffering becomes your own.
Love is a bit like that.
If our hearts are small, the tiniest faults and failings of those around us can enrage us. If we expand our hearts, however, we become capable of treating others with compassion and empathy.
So how do you become more loving?
Love needs sustenance. It needs happiness.
That’s because love is a living thing and, like every other breathing being, it needs nourishment.
Happiness is the food of love. When you’re happy, you become capable of loving both yourself and others.
But that begs the question: What is happiness?
Zen Buddhism can provide a few insights.
Happiness can’t be attained by fulfilling superficial desires. It’s the fruit of mindfulness. Take walking. If you focus your attention on every single movement of your body and forget your eventual destination and the reason you’re trying to get there, you’ll begin to understand what happiness is.
That’s because mindfulness is about experiencing and appreciating the present moment. When we’re attentive to the present, we begin to notice how much beauty there is in the world. We can truly appreciate the joys of something as simple as a blossoming flower.
But don’t keep this to yourself! Beauty, like love and happiness, is made for sharing.
Practicing mindfulness is a great way of learning how to share these gifts with other people.
Imagine going for a walk with a friend who’s preoccupied and worried about something. You can bring happiness and love into their troubled reflections just by pointing out the things that warm your heart, whether it’s the sun or the play of clouds in the sky above you.
What do you think of when you hear the word “love”?
Many of us associate the concept with a particular kind of desirable partner – ideally a good-looking and successful one!
But that’s not true love.
To grasp this, you have to first understand the nature of love.
True love isn’t about what you stand to gain, but rather about recognizing and understanding the suffering of others. Love lets you see suffering from the perspective of another person, and that makes it easier to help them. Another way of describing this quality of true love is empathy.
It’s not hard to recognize true love when you find it. It reveals a world of beauty and feels both refreshing and solid. It gives you a sense of freedom, tranquility and joy. If you think you might be in love, ask yourself whether you’re filled with a sense of pure joyfulness. If you aren’t, chances are it’s not true love.
Joy is complemented by reverence. In many parts of Asia, there’s a custom that spouses should be treated as reverently as guests by one another. That’s an important part of maintaining a relationship, and even long-term partners should be treated with the same deep respect.
The final attribute of true love is its expansiveness. In the beginning, love is focused on a single person. But in time it grows and begins to extend outward to encompass all living things.
To recognize true love you should pay heed to its four defining traits.
These are loving-kindness, compassion, joy and equanimity.
Let’s unpack those concepts.
Loving-kindness is about using mindfulness to make others happy. Put differently, it’s our ability to make the sun shine in even the most overcast heart.
Compassion lets us see the suffering of others and identify ourselves with their plight. Once we’re attuned to their suffering, we become empathetic – we are able to see truly and listen deeply.
Joy is lasting and deep happiness. To bring joy to others is a great gift.
The final trait is equanimity. This can also be called inclusiveness. It’s the ability to dissolve the boundaries between yourself and another person so that their suffering becomes your own.
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Who do you value the most?
Many chase love in the people around them - in a partner, children, parents.
And then wonder why something is missing.
But the truth is, the main romance of your life is you yourself😠 You deserve the hottest and most devoted love.
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
Many chase love in the people around them - in a partner, children, parents.
And then wonder why something is missing.
But the truth is, the main romance of your life is you yourself
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What drives someone to kill? Why do ordinary people commit extraordinary acts of courage? How does a parent decide which child to save from a burning building?This Blink reveals fascinating answers to these questions. Based on one human rights lawyer's decade-long investigation into human nature, it uncovers several distinct behavioral patterns that we carry within us – from aggression to tribalism to heroism.
Backed by groundbreaking psychological studies and heartwrenching real-life stories, this exploration will help you understand why the best and worst of humanity often coexist, how ancient survival mechanisms still govern modern behavior, and how you and others might behave in extreme situations.
Why do some people risk their lives for strangers while others walk past someone in need? The answer may lie in the modular structure of your mind.
Just as your body evolved specialized organs—a heart to pump blood, lungs to breathe—your brain developed specialized mental programs to solve recurring survival challenges. This is the theory of evolutionary modularity. Over millions of years, natural selection built distinct circuits in our minds to handle specific problems: finding mates, detecting threats and navigating social hierarchies. Understanding these modules unlocks the secrets of why we behave the way we do in certain situations.
Consider an extraordinary medical case that reveals a module of our brain specialized in recognizing other people’s emotions. A 52-year-old physician suffered two devastating strokes that destroyed his visual cortex, leaving him completely blind. Yet when his doctor, Alan Pegna, smiled at him during an examination, the blind man smiled back. "I'm in total darkness," he insisted. "I can't see you." But somehow, he could.
Brain scans revealed the answer: his amygdala—a deep brain structure—was still processing human emotions through an ancient subcortical pathway. In experiments, while blind to shapes and objects, he could distinguish happy from angry faces with remarkable accuracy. Evolution had built such critical circuitry for reading others' emotions that it operated independently of conscious vision. It turns out that we literally have a specialized module dedicated to detecting others' suffering. Let’s call this module “the Perceiver of Pain”.
But there's a catch. Research by neuroscientist Tania Singer shows that when we empathize with someone in pain, our own pain networks activate. In her studies with romantic couples, women's brains lit up identically whether they received an electric shock or watched their partner receive one. Feeling others' pain is neurologically real—and exhausting. This explains the phenomenon of compassion fatigue: we can only take on so much pain from others. That’s why sometimes, people subconsciously choose to protect themselves by looking away from suffering.
Yet Singer discovered another remarkable phenomenon. When she studied Buddhist monk Matthieu Richard, she noticed that when he actively cultivated compassion toward suffering children, a feeling of warmth and a desire to help, different brain regions activated. These were reward centers, the same ones that light up when we receive something pleasant. So perhaps “compassion fatigue” is an unfair term for some people’s inability to take on the suffering of others. Because unlike mere empathy, real compassion doesn't just cost us—it pays us back neurologically.
The Perceiver of Pain helps us understand why caring feels both difficult and rewarding. It also offers hope that with practice, we can train ourselves to help others without burning out. Now, let’s consider some other crucial modules of the human mind.
#the_ten_types_of_human
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
Backed by groundbreaking psychological studies and heartwrenching real-life stories, this exploration will help you understand why the best and worst of humanity often coexist, how ancient survival mechanisms still govern modern behavior, and how you and others might behave in extreme situations.
Why do some people risk their lives for strangers while others walk past someone in need? The answer may lie in the modular structure of your mind.
Just as your body evolved specialized organs—a heart to pump blood, lungs to breathe—your brain developed specialized mental programs to solve recurring survival challenges. This is the theory of evolutionary modularity. Over millions of years, natural selection built distinct circuits in our minds to handle specific problems: finding mates, detecting threats and navigating social hierarchies. Understanding these modules unlocks the secrets of why we behave the way we do in certain situations.
Consider an extraordinary medical case that reveals a module of our brain specialized in recognizing other people’s emotions. A 52-year-old physician suffered two devastating strokes that destroyed his visual cortex, leaving him completely blind. Yet when his doctor, Alan Pegna, smiled at him during an examination, the blind man smiled back. "I'm in total darkness," he insisted. "I can't see you." But somehow, he could.
Brain scans revealed the answer: his amygdala—a deep brain structure—was still processing human emotions through an ancient subcortical pathway. In experiments, while blind to shapes and objects, he could distinguish happy from angry faces with remarkable accuracy. Evolution had built such critical circuitry for reading others' emotions that it operated independently of conscious vision. It turns out that we literally have a specialized module dedicated to detecting others' suffering. Let’s call this module “the Perceiver of Pain”.
But there's a catch. Research by neuroscientist Tania Singer shows that when we empathize with someone in pain, our own pain networks activate. In her studies with romantic couples, women's brains lit up identically whether they received an electric shock or watched their partner receive one. Feeling others' pain is neurologically real—and exhausting. This explains the phenomenon of compassion fatigue: we can only take on so much pain from others. That’s why sometimes, people subconsciously choose to protect themselves by looking away from suffering.
Yet Singer discovered another remarkable phenomenon. When she studied Buddhist monk Matthieu Richard, she noticed that when he actively cultivated compassion toward suffering children, a feeling of warmth and a desire to help, different brain regions activated. These were reward centers, the same ones that light up when we receive something pleasant. So perhaps “compassion fatigue” is an unfair term for some people’s inability to take on the suffering of others. Because unlike mere empathy, real compassion doesn't just cost us—it pays us back neurologically.
The Perceiver of Pain helps us understand why caring feels both difficult and rewarding. It also offers hope that with practice, we can train ourselves to help others without burning out. Now, let’s consider some other crucial modules of the human mind.
#the_ten_types_of_human
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What drives someone to kill? Why do ordinary people commit extraordinary acts of courage? How does a parent decide which child to save from a burning building?This Blink reveals fascinating answers to these questions. Based on one human rights lawyer's decade…
After the Battle of Gettysburg, soldiers collected 28,000 muskets from the battlefield. They made a rather shocking discovery: 24,000 were loaded but never fired. Some had been loaded up to ten times. Thousands of soldiers, facing mortal danger, simply couldn't bring themselves to pull the trigger.
This anecdote reveals another crucial module in our mental architecture: the Aggressor. Just as we evolved the Perceiver of Pain to detect others' suffering, we also developed circuits for aggression—useful for protecting our families or defending against threats. But unlike what you might expect, this module doesn't dominate our behavior. Instead, it's constrained by powerful inhibitions that make harming others deeply distressing.
Research shows we experience physical stress responses—blood vessel constriction, elevated heart rate—even when simulating harmless violence with fake weapons and protected targets. We're averse to the act itself, not just its consequences.
Researchers at Arizona State University designed an ingenious experiment using a modified coffee grinder that participants believed would kill pill bugs, though the bugs were secretly saved.Before the task, researchers asked people to rate how similar they felt to small insects on a one-to-nine scale. Half the participants did a "practice kill" first, while the other half went straight to the main session: kill as many as you want in 20 seconds. The results revealed something disturbing about human psychology.
Without practice, people who identified more with the bugs killed fewer—exactly as expected. But those who'd done the practice kill showed the opposite pattern: the more they identified with bugs, the more they killed. That first transgression created psychological discomfort that continuing the violence helped resolve. By killing more, participants could justify their initial act. This mechanism helps explain how conflicts escalate—once violence begins, continuing it becomes psychologically easier than confronting what you've already done.
In extreme circumstances, particularly with children whose brains are still developing, the Aggressor can mutate dangerously. Neuropsychologist Thomas Elbert studied child soldiers across global conflict zones and discovered that violence can become "appetitive"—arousing and addictive, activating reward centers rather than distress signals. Like compassion activating pleasure circuits in Matthieu Richard's brain, violence began activating them in traumatized children.
Yet in most of us, the Aggressor exists but doesn't dominate. Our default mental architecture resists violence. That's why specific, often brutal conditions are needed to override these inhibitions. Understanding this modular conflict within us reveals why violence isn't inevitable—and why cultivating our compassionate modules matters more than ever.
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
This anecdote reveals another crucial module in our mental architecture: the Aggressor. Just as we evolved the Perceiver of Pain to detect others' suffering, we also developed circuits for aggression—useful for protecting our families or defending against threats. But unlike what you might expect, this module doesn't dominate our behavior. Instead, it's constrained by powerful inhibitions that make harming others deeply distressing.
Research shows we experience physical stress responses—blood vessel constriction, elevated heart rate—even when simulating harmless violence with fake weapons and protected targets. We're averse to the act itself, not just its consequences.
Researchers at Arizona State University designed an ingenious experiment using a modified coffee grinder that participants believed would kill pill bugs, though the bugs were secretly saved.Before the task, researchers asked people to rate how similar they felt to small insects on a one-to-nine scale. Half the participants did a "practice kill" first, while the other half went straight to the main session: kill as many as you want in 20 seconds. The results revealed something disturbing about human psychology.
Without practice, people who identified more with the bugs killed fewer—exactly as expected. But those who'd done the practice kill showed the opposite pattern: the more they identified with bugs, the more they killed. That first transgression created psychological discomfort that continuing the violence helped resolve. By killing more, participants could justify their initial act. This mechanism helps explain how conflicts escalate—once violence begins, continuing it becomes psychologically easier than confronting what you've already done.
In extreme circumstances, particularly with children whose brains are still developing, the Aggressor can mutate dangerously. Neuropsychologist Thomas Elbert studied child soldiers across global conflict zones and discovered that violence can become "appetitive"—arousing and addictive, activating reward centers rather than distress signals. Like compassion activating pleasure circuits in Matthieu Richard's brain, violence began activating them in traumatized children.
Yet in most of us, the Aggressor exists but doesn't dominate. Our default mental architecture resists violence. That's why specific, often brutal conditions are needed to override these inhibitions. Understanding this modular conflict within us reveals why violence isn't inevitable—and why cultivating our compassionate modules matters more than ever.
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You are not obligated to be completely normal.
You have the right to breakdowns, to bad days, to tiredness. You have the right to help. You have the right to be loved, even when you yourself don't believe it.
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
You have the right to breakdowns, to bad days, to tiredness. You have the right to help. You have the right to be loved, even when you yourself don't believe it.
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In that moment, she’s more interested in the chocolate cake than in her physical health.
#never_get_angry_again
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For centuries, trust was based on personal knowledge. And proximity. You trusted your neighbor because you knew them – or you didn’t, because you knew them a little too well.
But as communities expanded, we could no longer rely only on personal bonds. Schools, governments, and markets rose to meet the scale of modern life, and we placed our confidence in those institutions instead. They became the systems we depended on, even when individuals within them let us down.
That confidence has since frayed. Trust in government, for instance, has dropped from around 77 percent in the early 1960s to around 20 percent today. And we’re doubting more than politics – education, religion, media, and medicine have all seen falling trust rates.
In response, we’ve turned to distributed trust: reviews, platforms, and networks – multiple sources which, when combined, offer confidence and reassurance when institutions don’t. But personal trust is rising again too. The closer the connection, the more people seem willing to believe.
In this Blink, you’ll learn about the eight pillars of trust and get practical tools to strengthen each one in your own life. But first, let’s take a quick step back and examine why trust matters at all.
Your most valuable asset is trust – the steady belief that someone will consistently do what is good and right. As babies, we scan faces for signs of trustworthiness. And as we grow, that instinct doesn’t change. It becomes the silent filter through which we evaluate nearly every interaction, from personal relationships to professional decisions. At work, home, in health care, finance, and leadership, the question is always the same: Can I trust you?
When trust is high, things move faster. People share ideas more freely, collaborate more easily, and stay loyal longer. Trusted leaders earn more engagement, and trusted brands draw repeat customers. But when trust is low, everything slows down. Costs rise. Friction builds. Communication becomes guarded, stress increases, and problems that look like leadership or sales issues often turn out to be trust issues at the core. It’s the single most powerful lever you can pull to change outcomes – and a leading indicator of whether something will succeed or fail.
And in today’s world, trust matters more than ever. Digital life has distanced people from real connection. We’re lonelier, more polarized, and exposed to nonstop negativity. We worry about what’s true, who to believe, and how our information is being used. The line between what’s fake and real – people, products, and news – is blurrier than ever. In this climate, trust shapes performance, mental health, decision-making, and community.
But here’s the hopeful part: trust can be built. It isn’t an innate ability but rather a skill, a habit, and a choice. The most successful individuals and organizations today are aware of the value of trust and actively work to close trust gaps and prevent breaches. That work changes outcomes. It’s what turns divided teams into aligned ones, hesitant customers into loyal fans, and underperforming systems into thriving ones.
Trust is your foundation. And right now, it’s the biggest risk you face – a breach can wipe out progress in a moment. But it’s also your greatest opportunity. Prioritize trust-building, and it’ll become your competitive advantage.
#trust_matters_more_than_ever
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
But as communities expanded, we could no longer rely only on personal bonds. Schools, governments, and markets rose to meet the scale of modern life, and we placed our confidence in those institutions instead. They became the systems we depended on, even when individuals within them let us down.
That confidence has since frayed. Trust in government, for instance, has dropped from around 77 percent in the early 1960s to around 20 percent today. And we’re doubting more than politics – education, religion, media, and medicine have all seen falling trust rates.
In response, we’ve turned to distributed trust: reviews, platforms, and networks – multiple sources which, when combined, offer confidence and reassurance when institutions don’t. But personal trust is rising again too. The closer the connection, the more people seem willing to believe.
In this Blink, you’ll learn about the eight pillars of trust and get practical tools to strengthen each one in your own life. But first, let’s take a quick step back and examine why trust matters at all.
Your most valuable asset is trust – the steady belief that someone will consistently do what is good and right. As babies, we scan faces for signs of trustworthiness. And as we grow, that instinct doesn’t change. It becomes the silent filter through which we evaluate nearly every interaction, from personal relationships to professional decisions. At work, home, in health care, finance, and leadership, the question is always the same: Can I trust you?
When trust is high, things move faster. People share ideas more freely, collaborate more easily, and stay loyal longer. Trusted leaders earn more engagement, and trusted brands draw repeat customers. But when trust is low, everything slows down. Costs rise. Friction builds. Communication becomes guarded, stress increases, and problems that look like leadership or sales issues often turn out to be trust issues at the core. It’s the single most powerful lever you can pull to change outcomes – and a leading indicator of whether something will succeed or fail.
And in today’s world, trust matters more than ever. Digital life has distanced people from real connection. We’re lonelier, more polarized, and exposed to nonstop negativity. We worry about what’s true, who to believe, and how our information is being used. The line between what’s fake and real – people, products, and news – is blurrier than ever. In this climate, trust shapes performance, mental health, decision-making, and community.
But here’s the hopeful part: trust can be built. It isn’t an innate ability but rather a skill, a habit, and a choice. The most successful individuals and organizations today are aware of the value of trust and actively work to close trust gaps and prevent breaches. That work changes outcomes. It’s what turns divided teams into aligned ones, hesitant customers into loyal fans, and underperforming systems into thriving ones.
Trust is your foundation. And right now, it’s the biggest risk you face – a breach can wipe out progress in a moment. But it’s also your greatest opportunity. Prioritize trust-building, and it’ll become your competitive advantage.
#trust_matters_more_than_ever
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For centuries, trust was based on personal knowledge. And proximity. You trusted your neighbor because you knew them – or you didn’t, because you knew them a little too well. But as communities expanded, we could no longer rely only on personal bonds. Schools…
People generally trust clearly communicated information and doubt anything vague. Whether it’s setting goals, sharing strategies, or giving feedback, ambiguity slows teams down and sparks conflict. In fact, unclear communication drives roughly half of workplace friction. So the first pillar of trust, Clarity, is essential. Clarity comes in two forms: communication clarity – shared meaning so what’s said matches what’s heard – and strategic clarity, which links the mission to priorities and daily work. It also demands balance: share openly where you can, and keep what truly needs protecting confidential.
To build clarity quickly, use the “ODC tool”: define the outcome, set a specific deadline, and ask clarifiers like “What might get in the way?” or “What would success look like next week?” A further method is to ask “How?” repeatedly until a concrete task can be defined. On the final “How?” include who, when, and where. Amplify the information you get from asking “How?” with a quick 90-day plan: Ask yourself “Where am I now?” “Where will I be 90 days from now?” and “Why does it matter?”
Clarity builds trust fast – but be sure to keep it up over time as noise creeps in and memories fade.
Compassion, the second pillar, earns trust because your intent beyond yourself is visible. Acting on behalf of others – offering help, giving grace, showing up fully in conversations – is more than simple kindness; it’s a workplace asset. Teams that feel cared for are more resilient, loyal, and willing to speak up. That’s because when people feel psychologically and physically safe, they share ideas, offer candid critique, and celebrate wins, which lifts performance. Care can also widen perspective and cascade outward – when employees feel cared for, customers tend to feel it too.
Use the acronym LAWS to make care tangible: listen without distractions, appreciate specific effort, wake up to needs in the moment, and serve through small, concrete acts. From hallway chats to high-stakes meetings, people can tell whether your focus is on them. When they feel seen and genuinely valued, they contribute more, collaborate better, and stay.
#trust_matters_more_than_ever
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
To build clarity quickly, use the “ODC tool”: define the outcome, set a specific deadline, and ask clarifiers like “What might get in the way?” or “What would success look like next week?” A further method is to ask “How?” repeatedly until a concrete task can be defined. On the final “How?” include who, when, and where. Amplify the information you get from asking “How?” with a quick 90-day plan: Ask yourself “Where am I now?” “Where will I be 90 days from now?” and “Why does it matter?”
Clarity builds trust fast – but be sure to keep it up over time as noise creeps in and memories fade.
Compassion, the second pillar, earns trust because your intent beyond yourself is visible. Acting on behalf of others – offering help, giving grace, showing up fully in conversations – is more than simple kindness; it’s a workplace asset. Teams that feel cared for are more resilient, loyal, and willing to speak up. That’s because when people feel psychologically and physically safe, they share ideas, offer candid critique, and celebrate wins, which lifts performance. Care can also widen perspective and cascade outward – when employees feel cared for, customers tend to feel it too.
Use the acronym LAWS to make care tangible: listen without distractions, appreciate specific effort, wake up to needs in the moment, and serve through small, concrete acts. From hallway chats to high-stakes meetings, people can tell whether your focus is on them. When they feel seen and genuinely valued, they contribute more, collaborate better, and stay.
#trust_matters_more_than_ever
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What would you say is your biggest flaw? Perhaps you’re an inveterate procrastinator. Maybe you feel like you’ve failed as a parent. Whatever it might be, you’re not alone. We all have our flaws and foibles. It’s how we deal with them that matters.
In her research on shame and its effects on the human mind, author Brené Brown has gathered thousands of stories from people around the US. From these stories, a powerful pattern has emerged: Those who find ways to embrace their imperfections, lead happier, more fulfilled lives than those who don’t. While being aware of your flaws is an important first step, it’s not enough. The true transfomative power lies in learning to love yourself.
That’s easier said than done. So how do you do it? Let’s find out.
Along the way, you’ll learn why everything looks better when you zoom out;why you should devote a decent portion of your life to play; andwhy you should define yourself with slashes.
💬 💬 💬 💬
Most people would like to live a life that is true to who they are; in other words, we’d like to be as authentic as possible.
Unfortunately, a handful of factors stand in the way: for example, a lack of self-confidence or pressure to conform. As a result, we feel we are inauthentic people, too weak to live honestly. But this is simply untrue!
Authenticity isn’t a quality that you either have or don’t. Rather, it’s a choice, one that reflects how we want to live. It’s the daily decision to be honest, embrace our vulnerability and to not care what others think.
And because it’s a choice, we thus have the option to be authentic on some days and less authentic on those other days when we’re too tired.
If you do, however, choose to act with more authenticity, then you’ll need to practice courage and compassion.
You’ll need the courage to speak your mind and allow yourself to be vulnerable in front of others. To look at this in practice, think about the next time you really want something to happen, like winning a contest or nailing an interview. Try not to play down your hopes in these situations. Acting like failure is no big deal won’t make the pain of failure any easier. In contrast, being honest about your hopes makes it possible for you to find support when you need it.
Furthermore, exercising compassion allows you to recognize that you aren’t alone, and that, in fact, everyone around you struggles with the exact same issues as you.
Compassion, in contrast with sympathy, is a relationship between equals: in order to relate to the struggles of others, you have to acknowledge your own, as well. By understanding that everyone around you has likely gone through what you’re going through now, you’ll have an easier time opening up to them and finding support
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
In her research on shame and its effects on the human mind, author Brené Brown has gathered thousands of stories from people around the US. From these stories, a powerful pattern has emerged: Those who find ways to embrace their imperfections, lead happier, more fulfilled lives than those who don’t. While being aware of your flaws is an important first step, it’s not enough. The true transfomative power lies in learning to love yourself.
That’s easier said than done. So how do you do it? Let’s find out.
Along the way, you’ll learn why everything looks better when you zoom out;why you should devote a decent portion of your life to play; andwhy you should define yourself with slashes.
Most people would like to live a life that is true to who they are; in other words, we’d like to be as authentic as possible.
Unfortunately, a handful of factors stand in the way: for example, a lack of self-confidence or pressure to conform. As a result, we feel we are inauthentic people, too weak to live honestly. But this is simply untrue!
Authenticity isn’t a quality that you either have or don’t. Rather, it’s a choice, one that reflects how we want to live. It’s the daily decision to be honest, embrace our vulnerability and to not care what others think.
And because it’s a choice, we thus have the option to be authentic on some days and less authentic on those other days when we’re too tired.
If you do, however, choose to act with more authenticity, then you’ll need to practice courage and compassion.
You’ll need the courage to speak your mind and allow yourself to be vulnerable in front of others. To look at this in practice, think about the next time you really want something to happen, like winning a contest or nailing an interview. Try not to play down your hopes in these situations. Acting like failure is no big deal won’t make the pain of failure any easier. In contrast, being honest about your hopes makes it possible for you to find support when you need it.
Furthermore, exercising compassion allows you to recognize that you aren’t alone, and that, in fact, everyone around you struggles with the exact same issues as you.
Compassion, in contrast with sympathy, is a relationship between equals: in order to relate to the struggles of others, you have to acknowledge your own, as well. By understanding that everyone around you has likely gone through what you’re going through now, you’ll have an easier time opening up to them and finding support
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What would you say is your biggest flaw? Perhaps you’re an inveterate procrastinator. Maybe you feel like you’ve failed as a parent. Whatever it might be, you’re not alone. We all have our flaws and foibles. It’s how we deal with them that matters. In her…
Are you a perfectionist? If you are, do you consider it to be a positive quality?
Perfectionism, despite maybe sounding positive, isn’t worth pursuing. It’s different than striving to be your best, and is unrelated to self-improvement. Rather, it revolves around the fundamental fear of shame.
Perfectionism, in short, is the belief that, if we look perfect and live and act perfectly, then we’ll be able to shield ourselves from criticism, judgment or blame. This shield, in other words, is supposed to protect us against shame.
However, life as a perfectionist is emotionally unhealthy, because it makes our own self-worth dependent on approval or acceptance from others. Not only is perfectionism unhealthy, but it’s also addictive and self-destructive. In fact, perfectionism is futile, as perfection itself is illusory!
The perfectionists’ mindset, however, doesn’t recognize these traps. Instead, whenever they inevitably fail to achieve perfection, perfectionists blame themselves for their inability, and tell themselves to “do better,” regardless of whether that’s actually possible.
They become, in effect, addicted to improvement.
Perfectionism can also lead to life paralysis, that is, the inability to put oneself out into the world, due to fear of imperfection. People suffering from life paralysis might, for instance, be unable to send that email to someone they admire out of fear it won’t be well received, or might leave their writings unpublished out of fear of criticism.
Luckily, we can avoid the constraints of perfectionism by simply being honest about our fear of shame and by reminding ourselves to do things for ourselves rather than for others.
So the next time you want to get fit, for example, don’t let others’ opinion of you and your body be your motivation. Instead, tell yourself that exercise and a healthy diet will make you feel better and healthier, and that your success or failure in getting fit won’t affect your worth as a person.
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How many of us have tried to lose weight, but instead give up at the first sign of trouble? So many of us lack the resilience necessary to achieve our goals. Luckily, we can change that tendency. Let’s start by looking at where resilience originates:
Resilience comes from practicing hope. While hope is often considered an emotion based on circumstances outside of our control, researcher C.R. Snyder argues instead that hope is actually a cognitive process that can be both learned and practiced.
Hope comes from telling yourself where you want to go, recognizing how you can get there and telling yourself that you have what it takes to succeed. You can make the light at the end of the tunnel appear closer or brighter by dividing larger goals into smaller, more manageable ones.
Next time you face a daunting challenge, like giving up nicotine, make a conscious choice to take it one day at a time. Thinking about your efforts for a day is easier than thinking about it for a year or the rest of your life. And once the habit of not smoking sinks in, your resilience will build on itself.
Resilience can also be developed by adopting a critical, broadened perspective towards the adversity you face. It’s easy to feel terrible when the camera is zoomed in on you, and all you see are your “imperfections.” But if you pan out a bit, you’ll start to see that you are surrounded by people who share your struggle.
Many people who have issues with body image as a result of media pressure, for instance, could benefit from adopting a broader perspective.
They should ask themselves: are the images that I’m seeing real or fantasy? Am I the only person who feels dissatisfied with my body after seeing these images?
Answering these questions can help people remain critical, see that they aren’t alone in their struggle, and resist societal expectations, instead refocusing on self-worth.
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
Perfectionism, despite maybe sounding positive, isn’t worth pursuing. It’s different than striving to be your best, and is unrelated to self-improvement. Rather, it revolves around the fundamental fear of shame.
Perfectionism, in short, is the belief that, if we look perfect and live and act perfectly, then we’ll be able to shield ourselves from criticism, judgment or blame. This shield, in other words, is supposed to protect us against shame.
However, life as a perfectionist is emotionally unhealthy, because it makes our own self-worth dependent on approval or acceptance from others. Not only is perfectionism unhealthy, but it’s also addictive and self-destructive. In fact, perfectionism is futile, as perfection itself is illusory!
The perfectionists’ mindset, however, doesn’t recognize these traps. Instead, whenever they inevitably fail to achieve perfection, perfectionists blame themselves for their inability, and tell themselves to “do better,” regardless of whether that’s actually possible.
They become, in effect, addicted to improvement.
Perfectionism can also lead to life paralysis, that is, the inability to put oneself out into the world, due to fear of imperfection. People suffering from life paralysis might, for instance, be unable to send that email to someone they admire out of fear it won’t be well received, or might leave their writings unpublished out of fear of criticism.
Luckily, we can avoid the constraints of perfectionism by simply being honest about our fear of shame and by reminding ourselves to do things for ourselves rather than for others.
So the next time you want to get fit, for example, don’t let others’ opinion of you and your body be your motivation. Instead, tell yourself that exercise and a healthy diet will make you feel better and healthier, and that your success or failure in getting fit won’t affect your worth as a person.
How many of us have tried to lose weight, but instead give up at the first sign of trouble? So many of us lack the resilience necessary to achieve our goals. Luckily, we can change that tendency. Let’s start by looking at where resilience originates:
Resilience comes from practicing hope. While hope is often considered an emotion based on circumstances outside of our control, researcher C.R. Snyder argues instead that hope is actually a cognitive process that can be both learned and practiced.
Hope comes from telling yourself where you want to go, recognizing how you can get there and telling yourself that you have what it takes to succeed. You can make the light at the end of the tunnel appear closer or brighter by dividing larger goals into smaller, more manageable ones.
Next time you face a daunting challenge, like giving up nicotine, make a conscious choice to take it one day at a time. Thinking about your efforts for a day is easier than thinking about it for a year or the rest of your life. And once the habit of not smoking sinks in, your resilience will build on itself.
Resilience can also be developed by adopting a critical, broadened perspective towards the adversity you face. It’s easy to feel terrible when the camera is zoomed in on you, and all you see are your “imperfections.” But if you pan out a bit, you’ll start to see that you are surrounded by people who share your struggle.
Many people who have issues with body image as a result of media pressure, for instance, could benefit from adopting a broader perspective.
They should ask themselves: are the images that I’m seeing real or fantasy? Am I the only person who feels dissatisfied with my body after seeing these images?
Answering these questions can help people remain critical, see that they aren’t alone in their struggle, and resist societal expectations, instead refocusing on self-worth.
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Are you a perfectionist? If you are, do you consider it to be a positive quality? Perfectionism, despite maybe sounding positive, isn’t worth pursuing. It’s different than striving to be your best, and is unrelated to self-improvement. Rather, it revolves…
It’s common sense that you’re happier when you’re grateful for the things you have, rather than when you’re lamenting that you don’t have enough. This gratitude, much like hope, is not an accidental emotion, but is a mindset that can be consciously trained.
While most people think of gratitude as the feeling that follows positive experiences, in reality it is a practice that fosters happiness. This has major implications for how we live our lives: it means that joy isn’t merely the accidental result of external conditions over which we have no control. Rather, we actively choose joy by practicing gratitude.
One way to actively choose gratitude is by telling yourself that what you have is enough – or more than enough – rather than seeing everything in terms of scarcity.
We often fall into the bad habit of faulting ourselves for not having enough: we’re not rich enough, not thin enough, we don’t have enough time and so on. Instead, we should focus on the things we already have, and understand that we could have less. With the grateful perspective, you’ll soon find yourself feeling more grateful no matter how prosperous you are.
But above all else, the key to gratitude is to find value in the ordinary moments that make up your life – things like tucking your child into bed, sharing a good meal or walking home on a sunny day.
That it is a choice to have a grateful perspective helps people who have experienced severe trauma or sadness. People who have undergone intense, traumatic experiences, such as the loss of a child, violence or genocide, attest that they tend to remember fondly the mundane aspects of daily life before the traumatic experience.
🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩 🤩
Your intuition is one of your greatest resources in decision-making. Unfortunately, however, many people find it difficult to trust their intuition.
In part, it’s because most people don’t understand what intuition is. They think of it as a “gut” feeling that has nothing to do with rationality or reason. In reality, intuition and reason are not mutually exclusive.
Rather, intuition works like a rapid-fire series of associations that happens unconsciously. How so?
When your brain makes an observation, it goes through your catalogues of memories in order to find relevant information. This information is compiled into the unconscious “gut feeling” that informs your actions.
It is this exact process of unconsciously drawing on previous experiences that allows athletes, like basketball players for example, to know the precise angle and force they need to shoot a three-pointer without having to sit down first to do the math.
So, we can’t think of intuition as the opposite of reason. Rather, intuition is simply a way of reasoning that leaves room for uncertainty when making decisions.
By embracing your intuition, you put trust in both yourself and the experiences that have contributed to your knowledge. This enables you to act with a degree of confidence despite not knowing how a situation will play out. The basketball player, for example, can’t be certain that the ball will swish through the hoop, but he can make an educated guess based on his intuition.
But why should you want to trust your intuition? Simply put: doing so can help you overcome your fear of risk.
Most people avoid risk and uncertainty, leading them to act hesitantly and make poor decisions. By learning to embrace intuition, you’ll become accustomed to taking action in the face of uncertainty, and thus persevere through the fear of making the wrong decision.
⚡️ @keep_learning_english
While most people think of gratitude as the feeling that follows positive experiences, in reality it is a practice that fosters happiness. This has major implications for how we live our lives: it means that joy isn’t merely the accidental result of external conditions over which we have no control. Rather, we actively choose joy by practicing gratitude.
One way to actively choose gratitude is by telling yourself that what you have is enough – or more than enough – rather than seeing everything in terms of scarcity.
We often fall into the bad habit of faulting ourselves for not having enough: we’re not rich enough, not thin enough, we don’t have enough time and so on. Instead, we should focus on the things we already have, and understand that we could have less. With the grateful perspective, you’ll soon find yourself feeling more grateful no matter how prosperous you are.
But above all else, the key to gratitude is to find value in the ordinary moments that make up your life – things like tucking your child into bed, sharing a good meal or walking home on a sunny day.
That it is a choice to have a grateful perspective helps people who have experienced severe trauma or sadness. People who have undergone intense, traumatic experiences, such as the loss of a child, violence or genocide, attest that they tend to remember fondly the mundane aspects of daily life before the traumatic experience.
Your intuition is one of your greatest resources in decision-making. Unfortunately, however, many people find it difficult to trust their intuition.
In part, it’s because most people don’t understand what intuition is. They think of it as a “gut” feeling that has nothing to do with rationality or reason. In reality, intuition and reason are not mutually exclusive.
Rather, intuition works like a rapid-fire series of associations that happens unconsciously. How so?
When your brain makes an observation, it goes through your catalogues of memories in order to find relevant information. This information is compiled into the unconscious “gut feeling” that informs your actions.
It is this exact process of unconsciously drawing on previous experiences that allows athletes, like basketball players for example, to know the precise angle and force they need to shoot a three-pointer without having to sit down first to do the math.
So, we can’t think of intuition as the opposite of reason. Rather, intuition is simply a way of reasoning that leaves room for uncertainty when making decisions.
By embracing your intuition, you put trust in both yourself and the experiences that have contributed to your knowledge. This enables you to act with a degree of confidence despite not knowing how a situation will play out. The basketball player, for example, can’t be certain that the ball will swish through the hoop, but he can make an educated guess based on his intuition.
But why should you want to trust your intuition? Simply put: doing so can help you overcome your fear of risk.
Most people avoid risk and uncertainty, leading them to act hesitantly and make poor decisions. By learning to embrace intuition, you’ll become accustomed to taking action in the face of uncertainty, and thus persevere through the fear of making the wrong decision.
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The biggest lesson learned this year is probably that sometimes you need to stop seeing the good in people and start seeing what they're really showing you.
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We’ve all been there: waking up from a bad night’s sleep, we drift through the day like half-conscious zombies, yawning uncontrollably and unable to focus on our work. We dream about the moment we can get back to bed, but as soon as our head hits the pillow, we’re suddenly wide awake. It’s a nightmare.
But it doesn’t have to be this way. Sleep can be a wonderful, rejuvenating experience, a time for repairing our bodies and refreshing our minds. And although the modern world seems intent on destroying the sanctity of sleep with screens, artificial lights and strenuous demands on our time, you can use modern science to push back against this.
That’s where these blinks come in.They’ll equip you with the fundamentals of sleep science and their relationship to our physiology. And with them in hand, you’ll be armed with a host of practical, biology-backed tips, which will help you drift off faster and sleep deeper. This knowledge will have an instant, noticeable impact on your life.
In these blinks, you’ll learn Which specific hormones play a vital role in rest and recovery;Why sleep is more rejuvenating during a certain period of the night; andHow houseplants can improve our rest.
In our modern world, which prizes speed and productivity, sleep can seem like such a waste of time. If we’re swamped with work or overwhelmed by a laundry list of tasks, the first thing that we sacrifice is our sleep. This war on rest has become so acute that the average person’s sleeping hours have decreased from roughly nine hours to seven.
But there are big problems with painting sleep as the enemy of productivity. When you’re sleep deprived, not only are you slower and less creative – you also accomplish less.
One study, published in the medical journal The Lancet, found that surgeons awake for over 24 hours took up to 14 percent longer to complete tasks and made 20 percent more mistakes once they did. And if there’s one person you don’t want to slip up, it’s your surgeon.
One primary reason for this is that sleep deprivation reduces the brain’s glucose content – an essential carbohydrate that your grey matter uses as fuel. And this glucose starvation doesn’t affect all parts of your brain equally; the ones that are hardest hit are your parietal lobe and prefrontal cortex, which are involved with problem-solving and high-level thinking. After 24 hours without sleep, glucose in these regions decreases between 12 and 14 percent.
Furthermore, several studies have shown that skipping one night of rest makes us as insulin resistant as a type-2 diabetic. Having an insufficient amount of this essential hormone leads directly to weight gain, signs of aging and decreased sexual drive.
Thus, sleep is not the enemy of productivity or an obstacle to overcome. It is a necessary restorative state, vital for our physical and psychological well-being. We simply cannot be healthy or function at peak performance without good quality sleep.
That’s partly because being awake is catabolic, while sleep is anabolic. Catabolism occurs when molecules oxidize – they combine with oxygen, causing them to break down. Anabolism is the opposite of this: it constructs molecules from smaller units, literally building us up. So, while we sleep our bodies are repairing themselves – fighting signs of aging and strengthening our immune, muscular and skeletal systems.
Hopefully now you understand the value of a good night’s rest and that scaling back on sleep in the name of productivity is counterproductive. So, what can you do to increase the quality of your Zs? Find out in the next blink
🎅 @keep_learning_english
But it doesn’t have to be this way. Sleep can be a wonderful, rejuvenating experience, a time for repairing our bodies and refreshing our minds. And although the modern world seems intent on destroying the sanctity of sleep with screens, artificial lights and strenuous demands on our time, you can use modern science to push back against this.
That’s where these blinks come in.They’ll equip you with the fundamentals of sleep science and their relationship to our physiology. And with them in hand, you’ll be armed with a host of practical, biology-backed tips, which will help you drift off faster and sleep deeper. This knowledge will have an instant, noticeable impact on your life.
In these blinks, you’ll learn Which specific hormones play a vital role in rest and recovery;Why sleep is more rejuvenating during a certain period of the night; andHow houseplants can improve our rest.
In our modern world, which prizes speed and productivity, sleep can seem like such a waste of time. If we’re swamped with work or overwhelmed by a laundry list of tasks, the first thing that we sacrifice is our sleep. This war on rest has become so acute that the average person’s sleeping hours have decreased from roughly nine hours to seven.
But there are big problems with painting sleep as the enemy of productivity. When you’re sleep deprived, not only are you slower and less creative – you also accomplish less.
One study, published in the medical journal The Lancet, found that surgeons awake for over 24 hours took up to 14 percent longer to complete tasks and made 20 percent more mistakes once they did. And if there’s one person you don’t want to slip up, it’s your surgeon.
One primary reason for this is that sleep deprivation reduces the brain’s glucose content – an essential carbohydrate that your grey matter uses as fuel. And this glucose starvation doesn’t affect all parts of your brain equally; the ones that are hardest hit are your parietal lobe and prefrontal cortex, which are involved with problem-solving and high-level thinking. After 24 hours without sleep, glucose in these regions decreases between 12 and 14 percent.
Furthermore, several studies have shown that skipping one night of rest makes us as insulin resistant as a type-2 diabetic. Having an insufficient amount of this essential hormone leads directly to weight gain, signs of aging and decreased sexual drive.
Thus, sleep is not the enemy of productivity or an obstacle to overcome. It is a necessary restorative state, vital for our physical and psychological well-being. We simply cannot be healthy or function at peak performance without good quality sleep.
That’s partly because being awake is catabolic, while sleep is anabolic. Catabolism occurs when molecules oxidize – they combine with oxygen, causing them to break down. Anabolism is the opposite of this: it constructs molecules from smaller units, literally building us up. So, while we sleep our bodies are repairing themselves – fighting signs of aging and strengthening our immune, muscular and skeletal systems.
Hopefully now you understand the value of a good night’s rest and that scaling back on sleep in the name of productivity is counterproductive. So, what can you do to increase the quality of your Zs? Find out in the next blink
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We’ve all been there: waking up from a bad night’s sleep, we drift through the day like half-conscious zombies, yawning uncontrollably and unable to focus on our work. We dream about the moment we can get back to bed, but as soon as our head hits the pillow…
Sleep is a basic life need we cannot compromise on. And now that we’ve seen the light, it’s time to talk about just that: light. It’s something we usually take for granted, but it has a huge impact on the quality of our rest.
To understand this, we need to understand melatonin. This is a hormone produced by our brain’s pineal gland, and it has powerful rejuvenation and antioxidant properties. But, most importantly, it regulates the body’s circadian rhythm – our internal body clock, which tells us when to sleep.
Our production of melatonin is heavily affected by exposure to light; when the sun goes down in the evening, our bodies naturally release the hormone, making us sleepy. And people exposed to light early in the mornings will produce more melatonin in the evenings, allowing them to fall asleep faster and in a deeper state once they doze off.
This is why we should try to maximize light exposure during the day. And it’s particularly important to expose ourselves to sunlight early in the morning, because bright light also prompts our brains, organs and glands to wake up and be alert. With this in mind, try getting a short walk in somewhere between the hours of 6:00 a.m. and 8:30 a.m.
At the other end of the day, in the evenings, limit your exposure to screens, starting 60 minutes before bed. Electronic devices pump out a heavy blue spectrum of artificial light. Your body is especially sensitive to this spectrum, and exposure to it in the evening inhibits the release of melatonin, making it harder to sleep. There is software available for phones and computers that filters this blue spectrum out, but it’s better to steer clear of the screens completely and read a book before bed instead.
Also, ensure you’re sleeping in a pitch-black room. Light isn’t just absorbed through our eyes, but our skin as well. Nightlights and daylight rays peeking through curtains inhibit melatonin production, which leads to lighter and shorter sleep. Studies have shown that light in bedrooms can suppress melatonin levels by over 50 percent, so blackout blinds are a must for those sleeping after sunrise!
But an easier – and cheaper – way of blocking out light is to ensure we get all of our rest when the sun is down. And this leads us onto our next important factor for sleep: timing.
🎅 @keep_learning_english
To understand this, we need to understand melatonin. This is a hormone produced by our brain’s pineal gland, and it has powerful rejuvenation and antioxidant properties. But, most importantly, it regulates the body’s circadian rhythm – our internal body clock, which tells us when to sleep.
Our production of melatonin is heavily affected by exposure to light; when the sun goes down in the evening, our bodies naturally release the hormone, making us sleepy. And people exposed to light early in the mornings will produce more melatonin in the evenings, allowing them to fall asleep faster and in a deeper state once they doze off.
This is why we should try to maximize light exposure during the day. And it’s particularly important to expose ourselves to sunlight early in the morning, because bright light also prompts our brains, organs and glands to wake up and be alert. With this in mind, try getting a short walk in somewhere between the hours of 6:00 a.m. and 8:30 a.m.
At the other end of the day, in the evenings, limit your exposure to screens, starting 60 minutes before bed. Electronic devices pump out a heavy blue spectrum of artificial light. Your body is especially sensitive to this spectrum, and exposure to it in the evening inhibits the release of melatonin, making it harder to sleep. There is software available for phones and computers that filters this blue spectrum out, but it’s better to steer clear of the screens completely and read a book before bed instead.
Also, ensure you’re sleeping in a pitch-black room. Light isn’t just absorbed through our eyes, but our skin as well. Nightlights and daylight rays peeking through curtains inhibit melatonin production, which leads to lighter and shorter sleep. Studies have shown that light in bedrooms can suppress melatonin levels by over 50 percent, so blackout blinds are a must for those sleeping after sunrise!
But an easier – and cheaper – way of blocking out light is to ensure we get all of our rest when the sun is down. And this leads us onto our next important factor for sleep: timing.
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We’ve all been there: waking up from a bad night’s sleep, we drift through the day like half-conscious zombies, yawning uncontrollably and unable to focus on our work. We dream about the moment we can get back to bed, but as soon as our head hits the pillow…
It’s all well and good to do the right thing, but doing it at the wrong time is completely counterproductive, like applying sunscreen in the evening or watering flowers in the rain. This is especially true for sleep. We can do everything right, but if we don’t pay attention to our timing, we won’t get the best rest we possibly can. So let’s look at some timing tips that will improve our nightly rest.
First, we should respect our internal body clock by going to bed within 30 minutes of the same time every night.
The modern world of work encourages us to cut down on sleep during the week and catch up on weekends – but this wreaks havoc with our circadian rhythms. Our bodies don’t know when it’s Sunday; they just can’t adapt quickly enough to incorporate our late-night Netflix binges on weekends! If we hit the hay at a consistent time, our circadian rhythm will run smoothly, and we’ll find it much easier to fall asleep and wake up.
Second, we should tuck in and wake up early.
One 2008 study by researchers at the University of North Texas makes the case for early mornings. It found that students identifying as morning people achieved higher academic grades, averaging a 3.5 GPA, compared to just 2.5 for night owls.
The reason for this is encoded into our DNA. Humans are a diurnal species, meaning that we’re active during the day. And for most of human history, we’ve been hunter-gatherers. Our ancestors were programmed to sleep at sundown because snoozing during the day was a very effective way of being eaten by a predator.
So, for thousands of years evolution has conditioned humans to react to the Earth’s patterns of light and darkness. Only in the last 150 years have humans started to override this instinct with the invention of the light bulb. But 150 years is a fleeting moment on the grand scale of evolution, and our bodies haven’t caught up to our new nocturnal habits.
Third, we should take advantage of the magic window of sleep between 10:00 p.m. and 2:00 a.m. This is when our bodies reach their peak production of hormones such as melatonin and human growth hormone. This means that sleep during this time is deeper and more rejuvenating than sleep after 2:00 a.m. That’s bad news for night-shift workers: they can sleep a full 8 or 9 hours after work, but they’ll have a less restorative sleep than someone who sleeps during money time.
🎅 @keep_learning_english
First, we should respect our internal body clock by going to bed within 30 minutes of the same time every night.
The modern world of work encourages us to cut down on sleep during the week and catch up on weekends – but this wreaks havoc with our circadian rhythms. Our bodies don’t know when it’s Sunday; they just can’t adapt quickly enough to incorporate our late-night Netflix binges on weekends! If we hit the hay at a consistent time, our circadian rhythm will run smoothly, and we’ll find it much easier to fall asleep and wake up.
Second, we should tuck in and wake up early.
One 2008 study by researchers at the University of North Texas makes the case for early mornings. It found that students identifying as morning people achieved higher academic grades, averaging a 3.5 GPA, compared to just 2.5 for night owls.
The reason for this is encoded into our DNA. Humans are a diurnal species, meaning that we’re active during the day. And for most of human history, we’ve been hunter-gatherers. Our ancestors were programmed to sleep at sundown because snoozing during the day was a very effective way of being eaten by a predator.
So, for thousands of years evolution has conditioned humans to react to the Earth’s patterns of light and darkness. Only in the last 150 years have humans started to override this instinct with the invention of the light bulb. But 150 years is a fleeting moment on the grand scale of evolution, and our bodies haven’t caught up to our new nocturnal habits.
Third, we should take advantage of the magic window of sleep between 10:00 p.m. and 2:00 a.m. This is when our bodies reach their peak production of hormones such as melatonin and human growth hormone. This means that sleep during this time is deeper and more rejuvenating than sleep after 2:00 a.m. That’s bad news for night-shift workers: they can sleep a full 8 or 9 hours after work, but they’ll have a less restorative sleep than someone who sleeps during money time.
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We’ve all been there: waking up from a bad night’s sleep, we drift through the day like half-conscious zombies, yawning uncontrollably and unable to focus on our work. We dream about the moment we can get back to bed, but as soon as our head hits the pillow…
Understanding the biological aspects of sleep is an enormous help, but biology is only one side of the coin. To push our sleep game to the next level, we need to combine this knowledge with the right lifestyle.
First up, we need to set an unbreakable caffeine curfew.
Caffeine is a nervous system stimulant, one that on a molecular level is very similar to adenosine. Adenosine is a chemical that our brain produces while we’re awake, and once our adenosine levels hit a certain point, we start to get sleepy.
Because of its similar nature, caffeine fits snugly into the very same receptors in our brain that adenosine is trying to enter, blocking its path. That’s why we don’t feel tired after drinking a coffee.
But caffeine has a half-life of eight hours, meaning that 200 milligrams at 7:00 a.m. becomes 100 milligrams at 3:00 p.m., and 50mg at 11:00 p.m. In short, it sticks around a long time. That’s why we should refrain from caffeine after 4:00 p.m. It allows our bodies to flush enough of it out that we can rest.
Evening alcohol consumption is another thing we should curb.
Although a few drinks might help us to fall asleep, it’s highly disruptive once we’re away, limiting the amount of time we spend in the deeper stages of sleep. In particular, alcohol interferes with REM sleep – the sleep stage responsible for memory processing. This means that alcohol-laced snoozes are terrible for memorizing facts and fortifying intelligence. Sorry, students!
So if you’re out drinking, try laying off the booze a few hours before you hit the sack. Also, drinking a glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have will help combat the nasty effects alcohol has on your body.
Thankfully, though, there is some good news in this blink: you should have an orgasm before bed.
That’s because having a big O is a natural sedative, releasing a cascade of chemicals into your system, like serotonin and oxytocin. These two compounds are natural stress reducers, and they trigger the release of feel-good hormones called endorphins. With this cocktail of relaxing chemicals and hormones coursing through your system, you’ll find it much easier to drift away.
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First up, we need to set an unbreakable caffeine curfew.
Caffeine is a nervous system stimulant, one that on a molecular level is very similar to adenosine. Adenosine is a chemical that our brain produces while we’re awake, and once our adenosine levels hit a certain point, we start to get sleepy.
Because of its similar nature, caffeine fits snugly into the very same receptors in our brain that adenosine is trying to enter, blocking its path. That’s why we don’t feel tired after drinking a coffee.
But caffeine has a half-life of eight hours, meaning that 200 milligrams at 7:00 a.m. becomes 100 milligrams at 3:00 p.m., and 50mg at 11:00 p.m. In short, it sticks around a long time. That’s why we should refrain from caffeine after 4:00 p.m. It allows our bodies to flush enough of it out that we can rest.
Evening alcohol consumption is another thing we should curb.
Although a few drinks might help us to fall asleep, it’s highly disruptive once we’re away, limiting the amount of time we spend in the deeper stages of sleep. In particular, alcohol interferes with REM sleep – the sleep stage responsible for memory processing. This means that alcohol-laced snoozes are terrible for memorizing facts and fortifying intelligence. Sorry, students!
So if you’re out drinking, try laying off the booze a few hours before you hit the sack. Also, drinking a glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have will help combat the nasty effects alcohol has on your body.
Thankfully, though, there is some good news in this blink: you should have an orgasm before bed.
That’s because having a big O is a natural sedative, releasing a cascade of chemicals into your system, like serotonin and oxytocin. These two compounds are natural stress reducers, and they trigger the release of feel-good hormones called endorphins. With this cocktail of relaxing chemicals and hormones coursing through your system, you’ll find it much easier to drift away.
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