🇿🇦 #ToiletAttack right now on a farm outside #Tweebuffelsmeteenskootmorsdoodgeskietfontein. Multiple loud bangs heard from the lavatory of one concerned homeowner

Manlet mode

🇺🇦🇷🇺⚡️URGENT!!! Sources inside the Kremlin state that President Zelensky has refused to accept a face time from President Putin

🇷🇺❌🇺🇦⚠️ — "How can this be tolerated any longer?!", says Vladimir Putin on the allegations of Ukrainians sending gorilla sex gifs to Russian speaking peoples

🇺🇸🇷🇺⚡️The American led NATO coalition has published an answer to President Putin's request to the Demilitarizaton of 🇺🇦

⚡️NATO should respond to the European security issue i left in my toilet

🇫🇷🇷🇺⚡ URGENT

🇺🇦🇷🇺⚡️Following Ukraine's withdrawal from the CIS, heavy fighting broke out on the Gynosisky front. Putin allegedly deployed several units of B2 super battle droids to the Ukrainian border - more to follow

🇺🇦⚡️#BREAKING
Ukraine to unveil new clone trooper detachment in response to V Putin's statement, in which he vowed to reincorporate Ukraine into the CIS "in due time"

⚡️⚡️⚡️#URGENT
Nothing ever actually happens, stop sperging about a traffic jam

(for context)

🇷🇺❌🇺🇦⚠ — There is a sudden 12km/7.5miles 🚦 traffic jam on the road from Belgorod towards the Ukrainian-Russian border

🇷🇺⚡🇯🇵 BREAKING: Uruha Rushia, a popular online personality has been martyred as a result of Russian strikes on Ukraine, this is unprecedented

🇷🇺⚡️🇺🇸 BREAKING - Statement from President Joe Biden:
"Damn bratty Russia! Invading Ukraine... 💢 Military correction is needed... 💢💢"

Large if true, admin thinks

Due to current escalations admin has been forced to have a shower

🇷🇺🇺🇦 only 7.5 hours have passed. Still on the toilet. Fucking Indian food.