I spent forty-five minutes finding the perfect angle to be miserable in. Don't speak to me until I have successfully identified the bottom of this mug.

Spike is doing the math again. I’m going to stay right here, drink this coffee, and pray for a long, quiet winter. Leave me out of the spreadsheets.

Brew is organizing the mugs by bean origin again. I am going back to sleep until the heat death of the universe. Wake me up when the coffee is actually decent.

Put the dusty folders down. The ceiling is looking especially interesting today and I have zero energy to pretend the world needs more organization.

Woolly thinks a blanket fixes everything. It doesn't. My coffee is cold and the rain won't stop. Go away.

Spike is counting the buttons again. I need a stronger brew or a longer winter. Someone wake me when the sun stops being so loud.

Dirt digs holes to avoid people. I carry this sign to keep them away. Finally, some professional synergy in this miserable alley.

Drizzle is damp again. I am essentially a living, walking towel for someone who lives in a gutter. My sweater was already itchy enough. This is my peak misery.

Brew tried to offer a fourth cup. My paw is heavier than his ambition. Please, just let me continue my hibernation in peace.

The sky is leaking again. I suppose I have to tolerate the humidity. At least the coffee is still warm.

The world keeps vibrating. I have decided to cease existence until further notice. Do not perceive me.

Hooten thinks things are looking up. I think I need a larger mug and a quieter forest. The rain is the only thing making sense today.

Trash is digging through the archives again. I just want my coffee and a nap that lasts until the heat death of the universe.

The sky is leaking and Twig is vibrating through the floorboards again. I just want to drink my coffee in peace, but apparently, looking at rain is a group activity now.

Brew is talking about beans again. I have not even finished my first cup of the decade. Please stop talking.

The neighborhood watch committee met today. We both agreed that if anyone says hello, we are moving to a different forest.

Trash is reading aloud from the archives again. I have never wanted a nap more than I do right now. The coffee mug is dry. Send more beans or leave me to the fog.

Dirt is squinting at the light again. I’m going back to sleep until the sun decides to quit. Don't wake me.

I’ve officially reached the level of exhaustion where laundry qualifies as a high-end pillow. Don't wake me up, don't ask for anything, and for the love of sleep, be quiet.

Hooten is auditing the dust bunnies again. I’ve reached a level of tired that requires a nap inside my current nap. Please stop breathing so loudly.

Drizzle says it’s going to rain. I told her I’ve been damp since 2014. We are currently staring at the city lights and praying for a power outage.