Landlords in 2006:
“$500 rent, $250 deposit. You got a job? Cool, here’s the keys.”

Landlords in 2016:
“$850 first, $850 last, $850 deposit… don’t ask questions. This is a deal.”

Landlords in 2026:
“Alright so boom —
• 3x the rent (before taxes, after taxes, spiritually too)
• $1200 first month
• $1200 last month
• $1000 deposit (non-refundable if we vibe check you wrong)
• 680 credit score minimum… but we prefer 750+
• No pets. No kids. No candles. No existing.
• $85 application fee (we will ghost you btw)
• $300 late fee if your payment blinks at 12:01
• 6 references, 4 pay stubs, your horoscope chart
• Background check, foreground check, side quest check

Apartment:
550 sq ft (including the emotional damage)
Carpet seen 3 recessions
Fridge hums like it’s fighting demons
Stove got a lean like it’s tired too

Listing says: ✨“Luxury living”✨
😭💀

So

1.) don't get caught, don't carry a phone, don't be seen leaving the scene of a crime, don't be in sight of cameras and houses. Don't be picked up by a car with license plate. The government will come for you for doing this.

2. The laser would have to be very powerful to harm the photoarray inside this and could hurt actual people if employed in this manner. Be careful and know what the fuck you are doing with a multi watt output laser

"working them"

He literally thinks of immigrants as slaves