Карго анекдоты категории Б 🌴:

Donald Trump's grandson asks Donald Trump:
— Grandpa Donald, what is the Tower of Babel?
— Great America built the best tower in the world, and everyone came, and the damn Latinos, and the shitty Italians, and the fucking Frenchies, and the Karakurts, and even the Kovalskys came, and those little Japs, I hate Japs.
— And why wasn't it finished?
— Because Iran attacked the data centers and stupid people without GREAT AMERICA stopped understanding each other.
— What's Iran?
— Iran are terrorists. Very bad people. I defeated them TWICE. But then the covert Democrats came and SLEEPY JOE GAVE EVERYTHING AWAY. That's why I declared a blockade of the Strait of Trump.
— Grandpa, but why are you blocking your own strait?
— Damn it, why can't we send kids like you to an island now?
— To which island, Grandpa Donald?
— Oh, doesn't matter. Let's go and make THE BEST DEAL. Thanks for your attention to this matter.

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🌒@EastCalling

🚫 British Prime Minister Keir Starmer "seems to be about to resign" this week, - claims the GB News TV channel

Source: СВЕЖЕСТИ
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🌒@EastCalling

The Chinese Foreign Ministry confirmed Donald Trump's state visit to the country from May 13 to 15.

At the invitation of Chinese President Xi Jinping, US President Donald Trump will pay a state visit to China from May 13 to 15

the statement on the Chinese Foreign Ministry's website said.

Source: Izvestia
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🌒@EastCalling

The EU may start membership negotiations with Ukraine in June, said European Commissioner Marta Kos.

She also noted that she had received a "positive message" from Magyar on this issue, noting that he is ready to treat all countries - candidates for EU membership "on an equal footing".

Source: TASS
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🌒@EastCalling

About the current situation in the Republic of Mali:

Over the past 24 hours, units of the African Corps of the Russian Armed Forces in coordination with the Malian Army continued to conduct operations focused on searching for terrorist formations and patrolling populated areas. The Corps units, together with the Malian Army and under the cover of helicopters of the African Corps army aviation, escorted tanker trucks with fuel in Bamako. No terrorist attacks were allowed during the convoy. During the convoy's journey, no hostile incidents or terrorist attacks were detected.

X 🌟| Facebook 🌟| YouTube 🌟

Putin's speech on May 9th, 2026.

#EastCallingTranslations

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Potato prices in Europe on the market have soared by 700-800% in a short period of time - since April 21, the cost of futures contracts for potatoes has increased from about 2.11 euros to 18.50 euros per centner. This is due to problems with the supply of fertilizers due to the blockade of the Strait of Hormuz.

Source: Банкста
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I still wonder when food will be excluded from speculations. Basic products must be a subject of trade only for producers and real sellers.

There is a saying: problem of hunger in the world is not because the poor have nothing to eat, it's because the rich cannot have enough.
Let them speculate on caviar, truffles and rest of the overpriced bs, leave basic products out of speculations.

🌒@EastCalling

You will be able to find the following East Calling exclusives with these hashtags:

#TheWiners

-for all of the content related to "The Winers" featuring Ryan

#VneshVrag

-for Mikhail Borkunov's posts (also his colleagues' works)

#EastCallingTranslations

-for Russian videos which Jelena translates herself.

#MaratBattlefieldSummaries

-for the reports from Marat Khairullin

#EastCallingInterviews

-for our exclusive interviews with our special and often recurring guests.

#MomentofZin

-if you like to laugh



We may add more later!

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Five countries boycotted "Eurovision-2026" due to Israel's participation, reports BBC.

Ireland, Iceland, Spain, the Netherlands, and Slovenia accused the country of genocide and war crimes in the Gaza Strip, while TV channels believe that the participation of the state, as well as Ukraine, creates unfair conditions.

Source: TASS
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Finally, something useful about Eurovision,that turned into freak show long time ago.

🌒@EastCalling

👔 Kallas believes that she could have negotiated with Russia instead of Schröder. She noted that the EU should continue to increase pressure on Russia, "in order to weaken it and force it to make concessions":

If a politician doesn't make a fuss about himself, no one will make a fuss about him. So I'll say: yes, I could have. I think I can consider all of Russia's traps.

Source: TASS
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She speaks Russian, most likely, but that will not help her in negotiations at all.

🌒@EastCalling

👔Pashinyan stated that he did not consider it necessary to respond to Zelensky's threats against Russia.

Armenia is a member of the EPS, the EAEU, and the CSTO, but this does not mean that we strive to interfere in all world affairs

noted the Prime Minister of the Republic.

Source: TASS
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🌒@EastCalling

Trump seriously intends to make Venezuela the 51st state of the USA, reported Fox News journalist Roberts following a conversation with the president.

"I just finished a phone conversation with Trump. He told me that he is seriously considering the possibility of making Venezuela the 51st state," Roberts wrote on X.

Earlier, Trump intended to make Canada the 51st state.
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All of the vassals of the USA are just one, giant 51st state.

🌒@EastCalling

NABU and SAP have charged the former head of the Ukrainian President's Office, Yermak.

Earlier, Verkhovna Rada deputy Zheleznyak reported that Ukrainian law enforcement officers allegedly conducted a search at his home.

Yermak has been handed a suspicion notice. Part 3 of Article 209 of the Criminal Code of Ukraine (legalization/laundering of property obtained by criminal means). Part 3 refers to a group of persons or a particularly large amount, from 8 to 12 years with confiscation.

According to SAP, the case concerns the legalization of 460 million UAH in elite construction near Kyiv.

Source: TASS/ЗеРада
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🌒@EastCalling

In 60 days, only 9 container ships passed through the Strait of Hormuz.

MarineTraffic, which tracks shipping, reported: Two months have passed since the Strait of Hormuz was blocked for the passage of commercial container ships.

According to Kepler data, there are 53 vessels in the Persian Gulf belonging to the world's ten largest shipping companies, of which 79% (about 42 vessels) have still not been able to leave the Strait of Hormuz.

Only 9 ships have been able to successfully pass through the strait. Of these, two ships required a second attempt to pass, both belonging to the Chinese company COSCO. This company is the only operator that has managed to pass through the strait.

🌒@EastCalling

Germany will finance hundreds of Patriot missiles for Ukraine, but the missiles will only start arriving next year, announced Defense Minister Fedorov.

Also, according to his information, the new arms package from Berlin will include: support for IRIS-T systems, interceptor drones, and the Deep Strike and Middle Strike programs.
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They have to produce them first. And even then, the priority will be refilling American arsenals.

🌒@EastCalling

Top Neocon warmonger, Robert Kagan, blabbers on the strategic defeat the United States has visited upon itself in Iran.

“It’s hard to think of a time when the United States suffered a total defeat in a conflict, a setback so decisive that the strategic loss could be neither repaired nor ignored,” he says.

“Defeat in the present confrontation with Iran will be of an entirely different character. It can neither be repaired nor ignored. There will be no return to the status quo ante, no ultimate American triumph that will undo or overcome the harm done. The Strait of Hormuz will not be “open,” as it once was.”

- the Iran “regime” didn’t collapse
- Iran still controls the Strait
- GCC states will have to work with Iran
- Israel is diminished
- Russia and China are ascending

Kagan has no solution. But even he admits (his thinking) failure.

🌒@EastCalling

"It's time for London to call in its own medics"

This is how Zakharova commented on the new sanctions imposed by Britain, which were introduced, in particular, against a psychiatric hospital in Crimea.

Source: RIA Novosti
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There are no medics in Britain, obviously.

🌒@EastCalling

The EU added the "Orlyonok" children's camp to the sanctions list against Russia.

UPD: sanctions were also imposed against the All-Russian Children's Center "Scarlet Sails".

Source: RIA Novosti
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Are those who invent these sanctions mentally well?

🌒@EastCalling

The National Anti-Corruption Bureau of Ukraine (NABU) has released recordings featuring Yermak.

He is identified under the code name "R2."

According to the investigation, on the recordings, Yermak — in 2021 and early 2022 — is discussing the arrangement of a mansion in the "Dynasty" cooperative with a designer.

The construction process is overseen by "Che Guevara" — at the time, Minister of Communities and Territories Development Chernyshov, whose wife owns a share of the developer company.

🌒@EastCalling

АДЕКВАТ Z writes,

The so-called "Minister of Social Policy" of the farmstead has stated that the population there right now is 22 to 25 million snouts.

A significant improvement compared to numerous previous episodes of lying, in which figures like 30 million and 35 million were claimed.

But even this progressive act does not cease to be a lie — even 18 to 20 million there is highly questionable.

In particular, because back in 2018, the figure of 32 million within the then-borders was already highly questionable.

Since then, for the first four years, people died off naturally and migrated westward, and over the next four — some were "liberated," others were sent "to Bandera's place," and still others fled with tenfold intensity.

And the vast majority of those who fled, whether before the war or after, will never return to the farmstead again.

The human resource on the adjacent territory — both for the remnants of the economy and even more so for catching "meat" — is critically close to exhaustion.

The first problem has recently begun to be actively addressed by the targeted import of the most unpretentious sort of migrants — entire camps of Indians, Pakistanis, Bangladeshis, and others settling in Ukrainian cities are arriving in a steady stream.

The second problem can only be solved by radically expanding the parameters of the "catch" — both by age and by deferments — in order to scrape the last remaining residues from the bottom and the walls of the cauldron in which the herd is being boiled down for the constant pleasure of the crime bosses.

And this expansion is not going anywhere in the foreseeable future.

One of the Soviet maritime writers had a scene where a boatswain tells a greenhorn a story about sharks: They caught one, gutted it, threw the gutted one back into the water, and used the shark's liver (or other entrails, doesn't matter) as bait for a more noble fish. But before they could even lower the gear with that bait into the water, the very same freshly gutted shark bit the hook.

You couldn't find a more accurate allegory for the farmstead, the remnants of its population, and "Ukrainian-ness" as a direct analogue of the shark's essence.

And of course, the main practical interest in it lies in the aspect of self-devouring.

This process has not yet led to an irreversible resolution.

But the self-erasure of its participants from history and from the map of the world is happening with such enthusiasm and, I would say, fervor, that there can be nothing else on the tombstone of the Ukrainian state except the three words: "A Khokhol to a Khokhol is a pig."

And every day of combat operations, even at the current pace, brings this outcome closer with all inevitability.

🌒@EastCalling